mira, the red-nosed kat.

I usually get the sniffles when most people are already recovering from the flu. I guess you can say that I'm a late bloomer during the season. Someone else always get sick first in the household, and I'd get it from that person.

But not this time around. The first day I honestly thought that it was just my sinus, something I get on and off, usually when there's a drastic change in the weather [from sunny to rainy in a matter of minutes, or staying in with the air conditioning on and go out under the hot sun the next very second]. But then the next day the runny nose didn't go away, plus I got myself a bonus - a damn annoying sore throat. That's pretty much the deal breaker for me; I knew I'll be attaching myself to a box of tissue for the next few days.

... Did I just type out two lengthy paragraphs on flu? blergh.

OK so let's focus on something more cheery. Like the Bukit Merah trip I took! woohoo! Honestly, the 'open mind, open heart' mantra I held on to like my life depended on it [yes I'm exaggerating] worked like a charm. It was actually a very decent trip.

We arrived on Christmas day at around 3pm, and had one of the lousiest laksa ever, at a supposed kopitiam near the apartment where we were staying. I say supposed coz it looked more like food court than a kopitiam. Waited for the rest of my family to arrive, settled down for a bit, and off we go to visit my auntie and her family at a small town nearby, in Bagan Serai.

The next day was tiring! Went to the Orang Utan Island in the morning, and that was actually... fun. Especially since that was the first time ever I saw orang utans! Went to the Ecopark next, and I had fun there as well, surprisingly. Of course, there's nothing to shout about really... it's just a zoo with many trails to follow, and an animal show every 30 minutes [which was entertaining!]. And I had a good walk as well. Walking back to the main area, which was about 15 minutes from the Ecopark, was an even better exercise as I was carrying Fadlan in my arms. Penat k? Whoever invented the baby stroller is a genius. But Lalan [as we sometimes call him] behaved really really well, so it was very very pleasant :)

We were really tired by the time we finished our lunch, so we decided to have a little fish spa experience instead. It was the first time for my sisters and my Sayang, and although it was the second time for me, IT STILL TICKLED LIKE HELL. My Babe liked it, so yeay! We can go to the one in Midvalley together woohoo!

And that night, we decided to go crazy and head to Penang island for dinner. We didn't know any good spot in the area, so we just thought since Abang Wan is familiar with Penang, we might as well try our luck. The traveling took a little longer than we expected, but the food at Padang Kota was pretty decent. Well, not for Abang Zul and Kak Syisya I guess. Other than that, it was a very nice, impromptu dinner outing.

So yeah. I had fun at Bukit Merah. But in all honesty, I wouldn't really recommend to people to go there. You really ought to have an open mind and an open heart in order to enjoy the place. Yes, I had fun at the island and the park, but I don't think they offer much more that what you can get at any zoos. The apartment itself was quite a disappointment. And the crowd.... well, I'm just not gonna go there.

But to enjoy/endure all that with the person you love most, and to share it with your family is priceless.

Pictures will be up soon. :D

Anyways, we came back yesterday, and reached home around 2.30pm. My sinus has graduated to full blown flu by this time, and my Babe and I almost decided to not go to Faezah's [Lyana's sister] wedding! But I don't want to risk being sorry for not attending the reception, or the wrath of Lyana, so we went anyways.

It was one of the most relaxed wedding I have ever been too. It was held in such a small scale, but lovely nevertheless. Faezah was radiant, and Lyana was equally gorgeous! Nawar, the groom, didn't look too bad himself. sigh. Too bad I forgot to bring my camera!

ugh my head's feeling a little heavy. I hope I'm not getting a fever.

i wish i can sleep and type at the same time.

There's a huge zit a little on the left side of my forehead. Besides from being super huge, it is also super annoying and painful.

I'm currently taking a break from packing up things and clothes to bring to my family's Bukit Merah trip tomorrow. Well... not really a break la, more of a halt as I am effing sleepy and I'd rather continue in the morning with a much clearer mind.

I'm kinda excited about the trip, despite remembering that a few people I know told me that the place sucked. I googled the place, and found out that they mostly have nature-related activities. Now, to be honest, that's not really my thing. But who knows... It might be fun walking at the Ecopark.

Open mind, open heart. I'll probably have the time of my life.

I think my bed is calling out to me.

Merry Christmas, everyone :)

hahaha.

I did a double-entry on the three things I love, related to the award. Oh well. Malas nak betulkan. :)

i wonder how long this post is going to be?

haha I just realized that I was supposed to list three things that I love and nominate other bloggers I deemed worthy of the Kreativ Blogger award. My bad!

My list is as below:

a) I love the people I have around me; my great family, my best girls, my good friends, and my Baby Boo, definitely :)
b) I love cats (our Zoey Schmoey especially!)! I adore anything cat-related! Except for cat poo.
c) I love good food. Sometimes too much. heh :D

And for the award, I shall nominate:

a) Azzura - http://wickedrossored.blogspot.com/
b) Moqh - http://blog.mukhrizlatif.com/
c) Ili fm - uhh, what's your blog address?
d) Suffianr - And what's yours?

I'd name Najeeb, Kusa, Ikin and Saddiq as well, but they have all already been nominated at some point for the same award, so I don't want to be redundant.

Okay so let's move on.

You may realize from the date of my blog and the time, that I am blogging from the office right now, which is somewhat of a rarity. If you didn't, then you should already know since I just typed it out haha. The reason for this such rare, privileged occasion is...

THERE IS NO IFN NEWSLETTER FOR THE NEXT TWO WEEKS! woohoo~

There's no real reason to celebrate here, coz it's not like I won't have anything to do until January comes. But hell, I won't have to go back home late for the next two weeks, so I'm psyched about that. There's still reports to be written, and possibly people to interview, but I'd like to know how it feels to have a lil bit of a work-less Friday.

I hope my bosses won't kill me, if ever they found out :D

Especially since I'm kinda promoted, effective from January onwards :)

haha yup. No more Editorial Executive, hello Senior Writer! It's not really a promotion, coz we didn't have that position in IFN before (although there is a Senior Writer in IFA, another one of REDmoney's publication). Its more like a new position for me, with more work. And a bit more money.

Uhh. I think I just described a promotion. But anyways.

Azzura and I decided to meet up today for lunch to kind of celebrate my new appointment. And in a way to make it up to her for not being able to join the gurls yesterday, when they went shopping for bridesmaids' material for Noran's wedding. Azzura asked Noran, Animz and Along to come as well, but they're busy so nevermind. We'll have fun anyways.

Had a somewhat good lunch at Chakri Palace in KLCC; I say somewhat coz I had better Phad Thai in The Gardens. Bitched for a bit, walked and oogle over shoes and handbags and makeups for a while (while bitching duh), then settled at Starbucks for a bit for coffee (juice for Zura; no coffee! gila unlikely for her ok?!) and cake. And yes more bitching.

Of course, its great to hang out and just lepak with her, even for a couple of hours. Would love to lepak with her longer, but I still needed to drag my lazy bum to the office.

And oh, my office had the Xmas dinner on Tuesday, and my secret santa (Shashi, my copy editor. Gila terer hide it from me!) gave me A Thousand Splendid Suns! yeaayyyy~! I was the santa for Raphael, my editor, and I got him Philips' earphones. He told me he love them. Hopefully he told me the truth :P

And the dinner was great. It was held at The C Club in Pavilion, a jewelry boutique -cum-fine dining restaurant, owned by The Carat Club. The ambience was nice... We had the terrace all to ourselves! The food... well, it depends. Personally I find that there's nothing special about the mushroom soup, but the fish for main course was amazing. Took only a bite of the brownie ala mode, coz by then I was already too full.

And some of you may know how much I like watching people act silly... And I had a ball of a time that night! haha I dunno why, watching drunk people making little sense amuses me.

Okay I'm done. Only 45 minutes to go before I head to Kelana Jaya. Will be going out for a date with my Sayang later... We're having Bubba Gumps. :)

i crave for some meat.

Its not too bad spending time alone at home on a Sunday. Well okay that's a lie; I'm kinda bored, but it's only for a few hours. I'm not exactly alone, actually... the girls [i.e the maids] are downstairs.

Why am I alone? My Babe and his bro, Chik, were invited to a friend's BBQ party. I didn't want to go coz I don't know anyone there, and I know there's a big chance that I'll just stick around my Sayang and socialize very minimally. So why not just let him do his own thing for a change and let them boys bond over a little game called WOW? That's how they know each other anyway.

Furthermore, I don't want to be like one of those people who insist on having their significant other do everything with them, and I feared that I was already becoming one. I know that weekends are our only real 'us' time together, but we'll get many more chances. :)

I got myself an award from Najeeb about two weeks ago. He thinks that I'm creative enough to be considered a Kreativ Blogger. Honestly, I don't know if I deserve to be called creative, coz to be honest, I don't have a single creative, artisitic bone in me! But I try to be in my writings, and Insya Allah I'll be able to channel it better in the future. So thanks Jeeb for thinking of me, and I am really really really happy! yeay! Its my first ever!

So anyways. The award.


As a rule, the recipient has to lis three things that he/she loves, and my list is as the following:

- I love my dad, my sisters and my little devils. I've said it before and I'll say it again; I am nothing without them. They have been with me through thick and thin, and they know for the person I am.
- I love my girls to tiny bits and pieces. Azzura, Animz, Noran, Along, Adik, Lyana and Ikin. You girls are my rock.
- My baby boo. My Sayang. My Husband. And Insya Allah, father of my child. wah gila babi corny haha~

Ikin also tagged me to post seven random things about myself. I'm pretty sure I did it before, but for the life of me I couldn't find it in my archive. I'm just gonna try find it one more time, and will do the tag if that doesn't work out as well.

Hmm. Almost 2pm. I think I'll watch a movie.

8.30pm on a Thursday night, and I'm doing nothing.

I realize today that I've been doing most of my shopping alone lately. Its not much fun, especially during those crucial moments when I need to choose between two tops, or when I need a reasonable voice telling me that I have enough shoes as it is (which rarely gets through my head anyways haha).

Why? I don't know. My husband is not a mall person, I don't have much free time anyways on weekends, and so I resort to shopping on my home from work at KLCC.

However, solitary shopping does have its perks: I get some alone-time, and I find myself making good buys without other people influencing my decision.

But given the choice, I'd take shopping-cum-makan-cum-bitching session with my gurlies anytime, baby.

Talking about shopping, my company will be having a Christmas dinner in the middle of this month, before the bosses go for their holiday break (no bosses for 2 weeks! woohoo!). We're going to have a Secret Santa-thing that day; where you buy a gift for someone whose name you picked out randomly. I get to ask for something that I want in our wish list, and I know that I want a book. Question is: what book?

Any suggestions? I'm thinking of either A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini or Mark Haddon's The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. What do you think?

4 cups of coffee made me a zombie.

I know, I know... a proper update is due.

Been living a pretty much uneventful life as of late; things and shits do happen, but nothing big enough to blog about.

The big things that do occur are not my stories to tell, and so I keep mum.

The weekend was pretty much... slow. Didn't do much on Saturday, but had a blast hanging out with my sisters on Sunday. A drastic change from the busy-ness of the previous weekend.

And today was spent at Concorde for training. Went back relatively early, but had to go to town, and I just got back home like 15 minutes ago. So crazy tired, but I need my Internet fix.

I need to organize my life better. Things are not messed up, but it will be if I don't keep myself straight. There's this feeling that everything will just tumble down, or I will go crazy if I don't do something about the current state I am in.

I'm being vague, I know. I'm trying to figure out what I'm saying myself.

Or maybe I just need to sleep.

ps: Finished reading Love in the Time of Cholera. Awesome book. Everyone who knows how to read should read it. Also read Memories of My Melancholy Whore. Will start on A Hundred Years of Solitude soon.

just a short one.

Thank you so much for the wishes and support some of you gave before my appraisal. It really means a lot to me.

It went well; it was still scary as feck, but no major screw-ups. All in all, I'm happy with them, they're happy with me, so for now we have a good relationship and hopefully it'll stay this way for a long time.

Alhamdullilah.

Can't type a long one, I'm determined to finish reading Love in the Time of Cholera this weekend. Has it already been two months since I bought it? Dang it, it usually takes me about 4 days to finish up a book!

Oh well. Wish me luck!

the nerve of me.

I'm freaking out.

They tell me I have nothing to worry about; the appraisal is about getting my feedback on how I am in the company, how I feel, what I want to change, and what I want. That's what they say.

But there's this feeling. I'm anxious. Like I'm going to screw up somehow tomorrow.

Like they're going to realize that Elmira Azlan does not belong in the company.

*sigh*

I worry too much sometimes.

saturdays will no longer feel like saturdays for the next six months

Went for my first non-managerial finance class today. Eight hours of accounting and shares was overwhelming, to say the least.

I hope I'll get something out of it. But if my cluelessness and sleepy state of being were any indication, I'm in for a rough ride.

Anyhoot. Here's one thing I miss the most about not living with my family anymore: the fact that I'm not living with them anymore.

Sure, we fight like cats and dogs [sometimes cats and cats], but making stupid jokes with them, being bullied by the little ones and gossiping with my sisters are always great. We're slightly dysfunctional, but we perform best that way.

Now that the class has begun, we're going to be making less visits to Serdang, but my Sayang and I are going to try. Like tomorrow. We're going out for breakfast at Raju in Jalan Gasing. It's like, millions of miles away from Serdang, but we thought it'll be nice to do something together since we don't have much chance to anymore.

Need to pack up some things. Gotta go!

a bad day, but a great night.

If it wasn't for the date I had with the girls last night, I probably would have gone home and bang my head against the wall, screaming 'Why the fuck was I so stupid?!' over and over again. And I've been coughing like mad, so much that my chest hurts with every cough, so my day was definitely horrible. And that's an understatement.

I screwed up for the latest issue of the newsletter. Going into details would be lengthy, unnecessary and painful for me, and so I won't. And it's not something that I would want to remember either... though I know it's not something that I can easily forget. I'm pretty sure Melisa and Karen, two of my colleagues, as well as my boss are freaking stressed about it despite telling me to chill and not let it bother me too much; in the words my boss, 'shit happens'.

Suffice to say [in this blog at least], that it was the biggest fuck-up I ever did, and I'm surprised - but VERY thankful! - that I still have my job.

Moving on.

Azzura, Noran and I planned the outing since we met up at Zura's open house three weeks ago, so I wasn't going to let my depressed post-screw up state and my coughing stop me from having a great time. Anim joined in as well, although she just arrived from Perak.

We started off with dinner at Rak Thai in The Gardens. The food was, hmm... well, it depends on who you ask. If it's me and Zura, then we say its really good coz our dishes turned out really really yummy. Animz and Noran would say otherwise about theirs though.

Afterwards, off we go to Kenko to have the dead skin on our feet nibbled by little fishies. I didn't really have much reservations when we went there... I mean, I know it's gonna be ticklish, but how bad can it be? I seemed to have forgotten that I am EXTREMELY ticklish, until Noran and Azzura dipped their feet in first, and squirmed. When the three of them have completely soaked their feet in the water, mine was still a quarter way there, only dipping the cracked heels part of my feet.

I did manage to distract myself by taking photos, but I will probably need a book the next time around to completely divert my thoughts from the tickles.


The verdict? My cracked heels are really bad, so the 30 minutes was not enough for me to see any visible results. My feet did feel refreshed though, so it wasn't a complete waste. The girls said that they feel the results... I guess it works for those with not-too-serious cracked heels.

And we're definitely coming back again.


We've decided to make these little indulgence, such as this trip to Kenko, a permanent fixture in our monthly calendar. It's something that we have to do I guess, with our busy schedule not permitting us to meet up as much as we used to.

We finished off by having desserts at Secret Recipe. [by the way, its funny how I crave for ice-cream when I can't have any.] We talked and bitched; the perfect way to end the night, me thinks.

So thank you girls for brightening up my otherwise lousy day. Can't wait for the end of November for our next beauty trip. :)

the last Raya weekend this year...

... Was spent by going to open houses. Today's Deepavali, so it's a public holiday, which meant an extra day off. But not really, considering that it was the last weekend of Syawal, so we made full use of it.

Went for two open houses on Saturday night; one at my Sayang's granduncle's place in PJ, and the other at Lyana's. Stayed on a tiny bit longer than we should have at her place, but I missed her, so I hope they didn't mind all that much. Didn't eat all that much since we already binged out at Tok Chik Rashid's, so it was more of lepak-with-Lyana kinda thing than it was a open house.

Sunday was spent in Ipoh, for my Wan Saha's [my dad's younger sister] open house cum doa selamat, as she is leaving for Mekah to perform the Haj early next month. Since we were already in the area, we decided to give Arnie a lil visit at her home in Kampar, and I finally tasted the finest Laksa Penang EVER. Seriously, if I didn't have too much too eat already, I would have asked for seconds!

And Monday was spent at home. Not leisurely, though. My Babe's parents invited my family over [excluding Abang Wan, there were 12 of them including the little ones!] for a little get together. It was noisy, the food was great, and there was a bit of drama as well - typical of most Syed Nor Azlan clan's get together.

And now I'm beat. But happy. And I blog about my weekend, which may be mediocre by some people's standard, as a way to say 'so long' to Syawal. And also because I don't have much to blog about haha~

So now, I shall dread for the things to come tomorrow: Work, and more work. *grumbles*

And because this is my blog, here is a photo:

With Fadlan and Dina. Comel terlampau.

13th July 2008

And then, there was my Sayang's reception. At this point, I was done stressing out, and chose to just relax. We took our time to get ready, and I WAS SO GLAD I CHOSE KAK FIDA for this reception. She did a grand job, don't you think?

My Babe's parents took care of pretty much everything because... well, this is more for them than it was for us. And we understood that from the very beginning. You can say that we had the best of both worlds; a nice, simple, informal, modern-ish reception on my side, and a formal, grand, traditional event for his side. If you ask me to choose which one I like best, I honestly wouldn't be able to choose. Both were different in theme, in etiquette even.

My only qualm is that I did not get a family shot with my dad, siblings and little ones. Sucked as heck, but it was late by the time the reception ended, so we can't blame them.

I am vain. So sue me.


On the pelamin. Something we chose not to have on my reception. Kak Pa was my pengapit terjun haha!


Just Noran and Animz this time. Lyana, Along and Azzura couldn't make it.


The US Army. Nana, we look good!


Siblings-in-law and... siblings-in-law to be? Insya Allah :)

*Edited: By the way, having the best man sing a song for us after the reception simply ROCKS. haha. I just had to mention it.

12th July 2008

The preparation was one of the most stressful experience I had ever endured; one with countless tears, sleepless nights, anxiety, and fear.

But the end result was one of the most beautiful, perfect time of my life; I was surrounded with (almost) all of the most important and treasured people in my existence, and I don't remember a time where I felt truly, truly blessed like I did on the 12th of July.

We wanted to keep it as simple as possible, and I think we managed to do so. There were hiccups, due to the lack of experience to managing/arranging something of that scale. The solemnization ceremony was especially stressful, especially when I found out that the mak andam forgot to about the banquet chairs for the bride and groom, when I was up on stage ready for the akad! And yes, my Sayang said the lafaz [just once! he rocks!] on stage. And then there was the one-hour interval, which was not enough considering that I had to change clothes, touch up on my make up, re-do my hair within that short period of time. (by the way, my hair and make up sucked. but in pictures, it didn't look too bad).

But the most memorable part ought to be that cheeky poem Fadhil [Kak Pa's friend] recited when we were eating. My Sayang even covered his face in... I don't know... what's the english word for segan? But yeah! It was the most random thing ever. But actually, I like that poem. Melayari bahtera. fuh!

The solemnization. When he said the lafaz, I thought he was rehearsing!

It was our day, so we'd be silly if we want to!

Alhamdullilah :)


My girls. What would I do without them? Even at the last minute, they pulled through for me.


My family. My rock.

To be honest, I fretted for a while, thinking about the things that I could have done to make the event better. And yes, I sighed ever so often, hitting myself mentally about how stupid I was to choose the mak andam. But then I looked at these photos, and I really couldn't ask for more.

It was more than enough. It was... yes, perfect.

:D

So much for one lengthy post over the weekend. blergh.

The weekend wasn't too busy, but between catching up with my sleep, hanging out at my dad's with the most precious but naughty Dina, lepaking with Lyana and furniture shopping, I didn't really have the time to update my blog.

Hence a serious update is postponed, yet again.

I'll make it worthwhile, and that is a promise I can safely make.

But for now, its sleepy time~ haha. Seems like I do nothing but sleep, huh?

pledge.

So many things to say, but alas sleepiness takes precedence.

This weekend. I'll blog this weekend. About my wedding [I know, almost three months overdue], my honeymoon, and tanjung mental. Right now, I'm sleepy. And tired.

By the way, for the first time since I began working with REDmoney, I felt like running off and just leave things be. And not care.

But of course, I didn't. And I do care. haih.

So this weekend. At least one lengthy post, I promise.

reminisce.

I never realized that eating can be tiring.

But still, samprits and makmurs call out to me every time, at every houses I go to.

But Alhamdullilah. For the food, my family, and those I'm newly related to now that I am married to my Babe.

I miss the Raya I had when I was younger. The trip back to Ulu Kinta, playing bunga api to my heart's content [not mercun though, I'm such a coward], my late grandma's dodol, the image of my mom as she prepared the casing for the ketupat. All that hoopla.

I gradually grew up, but Raya was still an event I look forward to. We stopped making a priority to balik kampung a few days before the first of Syawal, but we try to go back when we can.

Then Mama passed away, and Raya became incomplete.

It's probably a stretch to say that the meaning of Raya has returned now that I am married. I won't lie. But things have definitely improved when compared to last Raya, for instance. Hopefully, things will further improve with each passing Syawal.

But one thing is for sure. I want my children [Insya Allah] to have great Raya celebrations. With bunga api, home-made ketupat, running around and making nuisance with the cousins, and so on. Yes, all that hoopla.

Who knows. Maybe by then Raya will have a new, better meaning.

Salam Aidilfitri!

Just a quick one, to say:

Selamat Hari Raya everyone! If I ever crossed you, made you upset, say things or do things that might hurt you, I am sorry. I hope you are having a blessed and wonderful Eid with your family and loved ones. If you eat kuih samprit, ingatlah daku. That's my favorite kuih raya EVER!

Now. I think I go lie down. The only solution to four different servings of raya treats that I know of is sleep.

By the way, first Raya as a wife ROCKS. Well to be honest it really is no different than spending Raya with your family, but being together with your soulmate on the first day of Eid is just... splendid.

Ok. I go now.

no, i didn't lose any weight this Ramadhan.

For as much as I love the idea, albeit a false one, of losing weight during Ramadhan, and having berbuka with my in-laws, my family, my friends and my Sayang, I honestly can't wait for the month to be over with. I don't mean it in a disrespectful way; I am simply glad that I will be able to get my normal sleeping hours back in three days' time. And I am looking forward to not being sleepy at 12 noon. Oh, especially that.

This week has been somewhat eventful. Had berbuka with the rest of the REDmoney people on Tuesday at Traders Hotel [which was really good], met up with Zara, Kak Dalin and her boyfriend on Wednesday, baked honey cornflakes cookies on Friday night [my first attempt, and a successful one at that!], and today at noon, I made some chocolate chip cookies [another successful first time!]. Okay, so it wasn't all that, but all these little things made me happy, so its something :P

Next week, I expect more happy happenings. It's Eid on Wednesday, whee~! It'll probably feel a little weird not waking up to my sister's screams and nags to get up early on the first day of raya, and then the little 'arguments' we have about who gets to use the bathroom first. We usually go to arwah Mama's kubur by noon, and that's something I'm going to have to do in the evening next Wednesday, with my Sayang instead of one big family in three separate cars. Before going to the kubur is the ritualistic salam session, but I'll get to do that with a different - and new - set of family this year.

Insya Allah, everything will turn out well.

Other things happening next week will be the return of Ikin and Bad from Japan for Raya, as well as the double-honeymoon we're having on this coming weekend. Will elaborate on that after Eid.

Uhhhh I have more things to say, but dang I need to sleep.

haih.

Just ended a phone call with Ili. She's leaving for Liverpool tonight, pursuing her Masters degree in Music Management. [Music Management, I kid you not. To echo the words of a mutual friend, Wirda, Ili's going to be the only friend we know to actually marry a rock star.]

I couldn't send her off due to some other obligations, as well as the lack of transportation, so I thought I'd give her a call just to let her know. It was just a simple 'sorry I can't make it, good luck' etc kind of conversation. But i iz still sad :(

We have never been tight-knit-bound-together-for-life kind of friends. Not in a normal sense anyways. But we've always been in touch. And I've known her, as well as Azzura, since our primary school days. To say that we go way back is an understatement.

So the sudden tear and sniff that came after [well, during] the phone call, was a bit, how to say... out of the blue. But at the same, it didn't surprise me at all.

To Ili, we may have taken the years after high school for granted, meeting up only when it is convenient or for really important occasions. But you know that I got your back, and I'll miss you a hell lot in the next one year.

xoxo.

a quickie.

Went out with Azzura, Animz and Noran to KLCC yesterday on a supposed shoes and handbag shopping trip. Had berbuka first at Signatures before pursuing our mission to spend money. Zura and I end up not buying anything, though Animz did get a pair of shoes and Noran got herself a sleek new MNG bag for work. Went to Starbucks afterwards to re-fuel, and most importantly, to gossip.

As usual, going out with these girls are fun, crazy, and loud. Gelak tak ingat. It usually gets even louder if Along is around.

But I seriously need a pair of heels to wear with baju kurung, dang it. But no, I don't think I'll ever get desperate enough to look for shoes in Vincci during sale. Not ever again.

i should catch up with my sleep, not updating my blog!

Thank God it's Saturday.

It has been crazy at work this week. I guess in the end of the day, it was not something that I couldn't handle, but I wanted to do nothing but just pull out my hair at times. But I had two reasons not to:

1- It's not worth it, and
2- I love my locks!

To be fair, there were other things outside work that added up to the stress as well, but I don't want to indulge. Safe to say, you just can't change some things and some people, so it's best that you live with it the best that you can. At the of the day these things that annoy the crap out of you are just small things, and you just have to learn to see the bigger picture.

The stress will still be there, but you live better when you stop sweating the little stuff.

I am currently in page 44 of 'Love in the Time of Cholera'. Slow, I know, but I don't have much free time to read as I I liked to... not in Ramadhan at least. My sleeping pattern is way off - by the time I get home from work it's already time to break fast, afterwards is usually quality time with my Babe, then I have to sleep to wake up at 4.30am for sahur. The most I read in one sitting was yesterday at the office for 30 minutes I think, only because the network was down and I couldn't get any work done.

But I love it so far. It's a possible entry into my List of Favorite Books of All Time.

On another note, my dad has pneumonia. But minor I suppose, he wasn't admitted to the hospital, but he did get two different types of inhaler for his asthma. He's very stubborn, my dad; my sisters had to go through persuasive measures to get him to agree to go. He was still vacuuming the home! Not that he didn't want to, but he just has his own way of doing things. Plus he's degil. Of course, we didn't know it was pneumonia until they went to the hospital.

Alhamdulillah, it wasn't anything more serious. But the thought that it could be sure is scary.

And I just realize that, in this post at least, i start off a new topic with a lengthy paragraph, then finish it with a one- or two-liner.

I wonder if this is a pattern that I usually use. Hmm.

Anyways, I look forward to a semi-long weekend. Will be going to Ikano in the morning to do some errands for Mommy dearest, and possibly window-shopping for furniture for our new room in Shah Alam. Am likely to shop a little as well, but temptations need to be fought full-on. That is what Ramadhan is about, kan?

And ooh, buka puasa with the girls on Sunday! whee~

heaven is on earth.

Just came back from a little shopping trip with Lyana. I needed a pair of flat work shoes pretty badly, but since the ones I really like are expensive, I decided to buy something cheap just to get by while I save money for the real deal. Also bought another pair of reasonably-priced flats to be worn for leisure, which I like even better than the first pair. Oh well.

But the best purchase I made today were three - and I really mean three - books by Gabriel García Márquez for RM69: One Hundred Years of Solitude, Love in the Time of Cholera and Memories of My Melancholy Whore.

Seriously, it was almost like the books were calling out to me. I mean, I've been wanting to read the first two books and was prepared to pay more than RM100 for them, but to pay RM69 and get another book by Márquez is a freaking, definite plus.

I'm on cloud nine.

six days.

Ah... finally, Saturday is here. I plan to do nothing (well, not much anyways) for the weekend. I'm just looking forward to making up for the lack of sleep I've had these past week. 

I'm seriously considering not having anymore rice for sahur. Or maybe not having sahur at all. Of course, the second one is not really an option. My stomach would growl in hunger by 2 pm. I never thought I'd say this, but there is such a thing as too much rice, after all. Today is the second day that I woke up without much of an appetite, but I ate anyways coz there was no bread and no cereal. 

Oh well. So there is one thing for me to do this weekend. Grocery shopping. 

Besides that, puasa has been kind to me this year. And surprisingly, I don't have the urge to splurge on food and buy unnecessarily for berbuka, so far, unlike previously. And taking some supplements during sahur helps a lot. My Sayang says I lost some inches. I don't know, but that sure sounds good. 

Zoey just walked up on my lap... she wants to sleep I guess. A manja Zoey is rare, so I'm taking full advantage. 

Till later!

update - on the event of a break-in

He was released last night around 11pm after spending two nights in the lock-up. My Sayang and Padel decided not to press charges; his wife has returned the laptop and the money, so it didn't seem necessary. The bag's fate, however, is yet to be known.

Some people are not happy with his decision, I'm sure. And the what ifs did run through my head for a while: What if we're not the last of his victims? What if he's not remorseful? What if the wife is just as bad, but the fact that she was pregnant made us feel sorry?

But I respected my Sayang's decision. And I believe that this is wise of him. The wife deserves the benefit of a doubt. And we're hoping that maybe he will learn from this. We retrieved back most of what he took, and that was the agreement to have him released anyways.

[But the human that I am was annoyed when the wife kept on sms-ing my Sayang, creating sad sap stories to have him released and to settle things soon so that her husband can return home. For a while yesterday, I did feel like telling my Sayang to just pursue the case, but at the same time I thought, "Wouldn't I be doing the same if it was my husband?" But of course, if it was Kusa, I would've smacked his head hard first and warned him of the hell he'd get at home before doing all I can to have him released.]

It was noble of my Sayang to have made that decision. Judging from some people's reactions when I told them that the guy was released, I can honestly say that there's not many people who can do what my Sayang did.

I am proud of him.

Merdeka Day, Eve of the 1st of Ramadhan.

Its the 51st year of independence for Malaysia. I wanted to write a short paragraph of how I feel about the country and all, but the I read Najeeb's entry and he pretty much sums up what I wanted to say.

Nevertheless, Happy Independence Day to Malaysia and all its citizens.

And tomorrow is the first day of Ramadhan. I'm very excited about it; with this being the first time with my Sayang as husband and wife. But I do feel a bit scared though, because when most wives are busy preparing food for their families, I will most probably be stuck in an LRT to get myself home. And a bit bummed possibly, because I won't get to berbuka with Baba and my sisters on a much much lesser frequency now.

I'll look forward to the weekends though, when I hope I will be able to at least cook up something simple for my Baby, and I plan to make one or two kuih raya as well. And maybe we can sneak in a day or two for berbuka with Baba. And maybe, just maybe... this year, Aidilfitri will feel like how Aidilfitri was when I was smaller, with more things to look forward to.

I hope everyone will have a wonderful Ramadhan, and may the blessings of the Almighty gives you strength in this holy month.

on the event of a break-in

Some of you may have already know that someone broke into my Sayang's Subway store on Wednesday night. The culprit? A relatively new staff who hasn't been showing up to work since Saturday. His modus operandi makes me believe that he has been planning for this for quite some time, or worse, he did this before to a previous workplace.

He came in about 10 minutes after the night-shift staff closed down for the evening. He wore his Subway t-shirt, so that people around the area wouldn't get suspicious. We believe that he made a copy of the padlock keys using another staff's keys under the pretense of borrowing his bike [the staff had all his keys bunched up together]. He knew where to go and what to take; we lost some cash from the register, the small-change bureau [well that's what i call it], and of course, Padel's brand new laptop. He even took my Sayang's Braun Buffel bag to put the laptop in. He broke the grill at the back of the store to make it look like an outside job. Pretty smart huh? But at one point, he must've suddenly remembered that the store has CCTV cameras installed almost everywhere, and I bet he got scared. So he took a container, fill it up with water, and 'showered' the monitor with it.

And I mean just the monitor. He did absolutely nothing to the CPU which holds all the information. And that is seriously the dumbest thing.

Padel went the police station before my Sayang arrived at the store; at this point, we didn't know that the CCTV was not affected, and we didn't have a suspect. When Kusa arrived, he took the CCTV's CPU, borrowed a neighbor's monitor and plug it in, basically just trying if it would work. And then we saw him, and what he did.

Later on that day, the ever-so-smart husband of mine decided to try something to lure the fucker to the shop next day. He called the man's number, knowing that his wife would pick up, and asked the wife to tell him to collect his pay tomorrow and bring the Subway t-shirt along as to terminate his employment. It was a chance my Sayang took, and at this point we didn't know if it would work.

But it did. Boy, did it work.

I don't know what made him come to the shop this morning. Maybe it's sheer stupidity, maybe he really thought that we would never find out. From what my Sayang told me [from what his staff told him], when he came in, a couple of my Babe's staff were already waiting, one with a stick in his hand just in case he tries to run away. And, according to my husband, the fucker already had a resolved look on his face. When my Sayang finally got to the shop, two plain-clothed policemen were already there. When they showed the CCTV footage, he didn't even try to deny.

Maybe its the spirit of Ramadhan that has gotten into my Sayang and I, or maybe we truly are nice people [chewah], but the first thing we thought of is how difficult life is going to be for the wife, as she is four months' pregnant. We feel sorry. But at the same time a lesson must be taught. Nevermind that my Sayang said that the wife didn't look to shocked, and her reaction was too calm. Life is never easy when your significant other is behind bars. The police said that its too late to drop charges now as a case has been filed, so we need to pursue. We're meeting the sergeant today, so I'll update you on the progress.

For now, we are grateful that the laptop is safe [its with the police now], but there is no sign of the bag yet, and we're not too hopeful about the money. And Alhamdullilah, he's caught.

What a way to start Ramadhan, eh?

not-so-instant dinner

Alhamdullilah.

I was supposed to have dinner with Noran and Azzura (and Animz too, I guess) to have a belated 'welcome to the age of 27' get-together for Zura, but I cancelled in the 11th hour as I thought I had to stay back at the office. But that didn't work out, and to sms them and say "eh let's have that dinner anyways" would be beyond rude on my part. Left with a few extra hours on my hand, and what did I do?

I made dinner for my Sayang.

Refering to the title of my post, I made him instant dinner that didn't exactly turn out to be so quick after all. The Betty Crocker tuna fettuccine alfredo I made him did save me time; and it didn't really taste that bad, considering that cream-sauced pasta is not on my favorite food list. But I wanted to give him a bit more than just out-of-the-box dinner, so I tried my hands on mug cake - basically moist chocolate cake in a mug.

It took a while longer than I expected to prepare it, probably because I was too worried about messing it up. Or maybe I was just slow. haha. The baking part was really easy and fast; only 3 minutes for each mug [I made two]. But it didn't turn out to be moist [so in the end I did sort of messed up], but it was really fluffy, and filling. And YUM! It wasn't too sweet, but 11.30pm is not really the best time to be eating cake, no?

My Babe and I ended up sharing 1 mug of cake. The other one is left alone in the kitchen, waiting to be eaten. Kesian.

It's a quarter after midnight. I should sleep.

Lo and behold! Its the new blisskat!

After much procrastination [which is not new], I finally came around to actually start looking for a new layout for the blog. But I'm the least bit creative, and I really don't know much about using templates from other sources except blogger's.

After hearing my plight [more like after I whine like a schoolgirl], Ikin took it upon her to do something about it, and kind of surprised me by doing the new layout herself, and placing it together and make it look like what it is now.

I WUBB U IKIN!

It has ALL THE THINGS THAT I LOVE. And I didn't even request for any of these details from Ikin! Shows how much she knows me. And that we really don't have much friends hahaha.

First of all, there the colors... combination of pink and brown, and red. There are books, which I totally love, and a cat! And the jewelries are pretty much spot-on; the wedding ring, the necklace arwah Mama gave me, the earrings! The Mary Janes' shoes... they may be out of style, but I love them still! And I always put my hair up like that [when I actually have time to do things to my hair]. Ikin even got my mata buntang right! You rock, babe!

My Sayang said that it's cleaner now, and not so heavy anymore. So that's a definite plus.

I'm gonna go and do more 'oohs' and 'aah' over the blog.

Yeay!

a day before production deadline

... and miraculously I managed to find time to do some memes. haha. Procrastinator at work!

1. Your nicknames given by loved ones:
- Mama Mia
- Merah
- busuk (but I will never acknowledge!)

2. You are a person who...
- wishes that she can run around wearing heels.

3. That someone special. Describe what makes him/her your special someone:
- He is the only person who can make me laugh even when I'm totally annoyed/pissed at him.

4. Your favorite food:
- Neng's cooking (she took care of me when I was a baby till I was 18)
- Baba's sambal tempoyak ikan bilis
- Chicken anything

5. Favorite color
- RED
- combination of pink and brown
- midnight blue

6. All-time favorite songs:
- There's a whole bunch of it, but Accidentally in Love by the Counting Crows is our official song.

7. A person's attitude or behavior that irks/annoys you:
- People who act like they know everything. No one does ok?
- People who act like they like they're the only two person in love in this whole wide effing world. Yes, I'm referring to one specific couple.
- Pushy people.

8. 3 "must-have" things in your handbags:
In this particular order
- Mobile phone
- Wallet
- Make-up bag

9. When was the last time you cried your heart out... and why?
A couple of months back, when I was preparing for my wedding. My dad and I see things differently. So we argued, we shouted, I cried.

10. Tag 5 of your friends:
- Freaks!

rollercoaster.

I went back to work last Monday with a heavy heart. Seriously. It was so hard getting ready for work, and it had nothing to do with being sleepy! But the 2-week break did feel like it was longer... When I came in to work, I felt like I left my desk for far too long than a fortnight. But it was good to come back to something that I'm [pretty] good at. And despite all the dramas and stress, REDmoney is a good place.

But one of my sisters called me that night, and told me that my grandmother on my dad's side passed away. To be honest, despite being really frail and old, Pah U's passing was a huge shock. I was not particularly close to her, and she was not my biological grandmother; she was my dad's stepmom. But she was always kind, and a wonderful cook. Her small, slim frame can somehow light up the whole room with her presence. She always had nice things to say about everyone.

And on Saturday night, I found out that my granduncle on my mom's side passed away. Tok Halim's wife is my late mom's auntie. My second sister, Hani, is close to their daughter, Kak Dzuha. I call her Kak, or sis, as she is only a few years older than I am. His death must've been hard on the family. But he too was sick, but I have faith in what the Almighty has planned for us.

These news kind of gave me a reality check. There I was, a newly wed with a good job, good people surrounding her, and enough happiness to share with 100,000 people. And suddenly two members of my extended family passed away, and left us filled with tears and sorrow.

But then again, there is never a perfect timing when it comes to death.

And, I am reminded of what it was like when my mother left. Though I still have memories of her in me, admittedly I've been thinking of her on a much lesser frequency now. But whenever I remember that fateful Monday night in June three years ago, my heart gets tied up in such a knot that I have to tell myself to breathe. People go through so much shit and hardship in their life, but I can't think of anything worse than losing the person you love, depend on, and look up to leave before you are ready to let go.

Post-wedding FAQs

I think I should make printouts and distribute them when people ask me any of these questions:

Question: How's life now that you're married?
Answer: It's pretty much the same, except that I get to see Kusa/Along/Hafiez more often.

When are you going for your honeymoon? or Where is your honeymoon?
We haven't made any firm plans for a honeymoon yet, but we had a 'mini-moon' in Melaka a few days after the wedding.

Where are you guys staying at?
At his parents' place.

Are you guys planning to live on your own?
Yes we do. But there are things to consider before we move out. So we're waiting for the right time. And money.

When are you starting a family?
Once we have our financials straightened out. Not so much about having money to burn, just enough to live comfortably. There's no point in having a baby if we're not sure how to pay for the baby's expenses as she/he is growing up!

i am married. omg.

Alhamdullilah, everything turned out well. There were a lot of hiccups during my reception especially, but everything fell into its place eventually. I was surrounded by the people who were my pillars of strength during the months of the ordeal commonly known as 'wedding preaparation'.

There was my dad, with whom I had numerous arguments with during the whole process. We don't have the normal typical father-daughter relationship, but when he said during the merenjis ceremony that he wanted to kiss my cheeks, I had to fight the urge to cry and bawl there and then.

There were my sisters as well, without them I wouldn't be able to hold my reception. They joke that they provided the money for my majlis, but without them I honestly wouldn't know what to do. Kak Syisya and Kak Diana helped pointed out the mistakes I did and the mistakes that would have happened if certain things weren't addressed, and Kak Hani were in the picture quite late in the process, but she was there nonetheless. Kak Azfa was my replacement pengapit, since Azzura, who was supposed to be the maid of honor during the reception in KL was down with a terrible flu.

There were my niece and nephews, who despite their naughtiness, are the most adorable kids I know.

And finally, but never the least, there were my friends. The people who I depended on a lot during the whole planning process. I don't want to be biased, but Azzura was the go-to girl when I had to do things last minute. But that does not mean that Lyana, Hanim, Along and Noran did not help a lot! They did, and for that I am forever grateful.

The ceremonies were beautiful. The nikah was the event with the most hiccup, but it all went well. My Sayang said the lafaz in one breath, and took only one take! Funny thing is, I thought he was rehearsing! But he did very well. For that, I am very proud. Woohoo~

My reception afterwards was simple and intimate. There was not a lot of hoopla about it, but the turnout was pretty good. My Sayang's family reception, on the other hand, was in a much bigger scale, and very nicely done. It was grand. And honestly, I love my make up on Sunday much much more than the make up on the reception the day before. Thank you Kak Fida for making me feel like a queen!

Pictures will be up soon, insya Allah.

A new chapter has begun (chewah). But for now, let me just get used to the idea of calling my Sayang as Husband, and my in-law as Ayah and Mommy. It'll be fine insya Allah. I have five clearing days to register it all in.

i want cupcakes.

So much to do, so little time.

Seriously, if it was up to me [like, really up to me and I don't have to consider how others feel but I know I have to coz I respect my dad and I'm nice that way sometimes], I'd forgo the reception and have a nice, intimate akad nikah and lunch/dinner instead. None of this worrying about things that may screw up, or about arguments that will probably happen.

None of this worrying about not having enough money to pay off things.

Let's hope that after the wedding, I'll be able to recall my wedding preparations and remember the good parts of it instead of the negative ones. Amin.

Less than three weeks away till the big day. I think Time finally discovered wings and decides to fly and leave me behind. But you know, I can't wait for the things to come after three weeks. Of course, it means that I don't have to deal with this stress anymore, but it also means that I get to be Mrs. Ezham Hafiez.

[I am right now trying to stop to say something silly to refute the romantic-ness of the above line. Kusa does that all the time; say something sweet and then ruin it by saying something like 'fuh ayat power'. I will NOT be like him! I will prove to him that we can be corny if we want to! Admittedly, this is hard. sigh.]

By the way, I've given up on trying to lose weight for my wedding haha. There's just so much stress going on, that I need my sugar and fatty food! :P

Work-wise, I am finally confirmed at my new workplace yeay! My two bosses, AM and AT [they're both Andrews so we sometimes refer to them by their initials] literally sang me praises in the confirmation letters. Not to brag, but I did improve a lot, and I'm hoping to improve a lot more so I can talk to them about more pay sometime soon. haha. And I love love love writing. Although admittedly, I find it hard to fall in love with the subject matter. [Islamic finance? Me? Srsly?]

I'm prompted to do the little meme that Ikin did on her blog. But alas, time my not permit me. Future in-laws are meeting my dad tonight.

Wish us luck!

shh. i'm blogging from the office. don't tell anyone.

I wish there's a device that lets me blog just by thinking about them. If there is such a device, then I wouldn't have gone into a month-long [well, almost] hiatus.

It's 11:42 pm, and I'm still at the office. This is so far the most late I've stayed back at the office. My work was done by 10pm, which is still quite late, but I have to keep a colleague company.

Oh damn. Just when I want to blog, my friend decides to go home! haha.

Well. Lets hope this weekend will fare better, for the sake of my sanity.

Ciao~

a bridezilla in the making

Okay. Enough relaxing after finishing up the report. From this week onwards, it's full-on wedding planning, baby.

Two months. Two short months.

You know how crazy these few months had been? I was so busy and tied up with stuff, I didn't even realize until about 4 days ago that my anniversary is coming at the end of the month. And that 2 weeks ago (27th April to be exact) was supposed to be me and my Sayang's own version of Valentine's. I never forget details like these. Never.

Oh well. I'll have a lifetime to remember. And a lifetime to keep on reminding him and hit him on his arm if he doesn't.

relieved!

I have so much to tell, but at the same time I'm so tired I don't know if I can go for a long post this time. But here goes:

Alhamdullilah, my internship report has already been sent this evening. It's a whole load of burden off my chest, and my back, the whole of me. This means that I can concentrate on my wedding plans right now, and I have more 'me' time. And hopefully, I'll get to see Lyana after sooooo many times of pulling out at the last minute; either by herself or me.

Some of you may know, some may not; my former employer has given me my pay last week. Alhamdullilah! Met up with him yesterday to get his signature on my report, but some shit happened but at the end of the day, I'm glad that I don't have to ever deal with him again. Seriously.

And to celebrate the good week that I've had, I decided to cut my hair whee~

I'll take pictures [insya Allah] and show it to the world. It's basically shorter, the shortest since the past couple of years kot. No drastic change here; I'd save radical haircuts until after my wedding, thank you very much!

Ooh. I also had a celebratory dinner as well. I treated my Sayang [and myself, duh~] to some Fatty Crab! Ohmygod it's the best ever! My Sayang said that my method of cracking open the crabs is 'brutal', but dang it, that's how you enjoy your crab, kan? I had SOOOO much, that I think I've had my quota for at least a few months. I woke up this morning glowing from a good dinner. haha. My Baby would believe me; he knew how much I wanted to eat crabs for the past week or so.

Hmm. So what else yea? Oh, I've shifted to a new office. I'm with the same company, but since the old building will be demolished to make way for some new development, REDmoney has been shifted to Menara KUB, in Jalan Yap Kwan Seng. It's more spacious, and there's a lot of places to eat... but the convenience shops suck big time. There's two, and they're both small. It's nothing like the one we're used to in Angkasa Raya. Back at the old building, Kenda [that's the name of the shop] has TONS of things we can buy. International magazines, a selection of sandwiches including turkey ham, fruit tarts, crystal bracelets, good meehon goreng, and the best yet, collectors' old currency notes. I'm hitting myself for not getting that ancient 10 sen [or was it 50 sen] bill for Baba. I don't know from what year it's from, but Baba would have loved it.

But anyways. Some may assume that by the thing's I've listed, Kenda must be a sort of chic convenience shop. But I tell you it's not. It's seriously similar to one of those Kedai Runcit Ah Chong, only cleaner and more organized. I haven't been there that long to miss the building, but I sure will miss uncle Kenda.

Okay. I gotta go find the answer for life's biggest and most difficult question: What to have for dinner tonight?

Ciao all~

new baby makes 5!

After spending 12 hours of my day in front of the PC in the office, I decided to spend more time in front of another PC, but this time to blog.

And it's all because I love you, dear readers. All 5 of you.

Work is good, and tiring. My pay from my old job I still have yet to receive. Wedding plans are moving, albeit very slowly. So basically, I've nothing new to tell. Well I do. But it's not about me.

My sister Diana gave birth yesterday to one of the cutest baby boy I've ever seen in my life! They haven't decided on the name yet, but I'll keep you posted. They're torn between Zaidan or Aidan Ilham. I personally like Aidan, but Zaidan has a nice ring to it. Furthermore Zaidan in Arabic means growth/bountiful [me thinks], but we can't seem to find what Aidan means.

I can't wait to hold him!

So other than work, wedding plans, internship report, and gushing at a newborn baby, what have I been up to?

I read. It's a way for me to catch up on my readings while at the same time kill time whenever I get on the train to or from work. I'm currently re-reading The Cider House Rules. Up until a few days ago, I was reading The Time Traveler's Wife. And that book is now officially my all time favorite novel.

It is about a time traveler who meets a woman at the library where he works at one day, and was told that the future him have visited her in the past since she was six. The movie progresses from there; how their relationship develops, the impact of his frequent MIAs, how they both deal with it. It was a complex, yet simple love story. It is one of the most beautiful stories I have ever read.

I love books, and close friends will know which makes to my lost of all-time favorites. But I have never feel so strongly about any other books, like the way I feel about this one by Audrey Niffenegger. I love the book so much, that I googled the author! Seriously! I NEVER google a writer before! And I keep the book by my bed, for times when I feel like I want to read on a chapter or excerpts that I like.

And there isn't many books where I actually imagined how it will look like on the silver screen. I imagine watching beautiful things, but then again, movies based on novels hardly ever work out great, don't you think? [Apparently the movie rights was bought by New Line Cinema and Plan B, owned by a particular Mr. Pitt and his ex-wife Ms. Aniston. Will we ever see the movie out? Hmm. maybe it's not meant to be.]

GO READ THE BOOK. Seriously. Requests to borrow mine will be entertained, eventually. haha. What does that mean? I don't know :P

Gotta go get showered. Ciao all~

i'm not gonna write you a love song

And a week has since passed.

Hello all! The week has been ultra busy for me. Starting from next week onwards, work will be piling up as I'll be given more responsibilities, such as writing reports, and a journalism duty on Tuesday which gets me excited, but oh my God I'm so afraid I'll screw things up! So wish me luck, people!~

Got myself a new pair of Levi's today after uhm... 4 years? I've always seen the brand as one of the must-haves in my wardrobe, but the price does put me off a little bit. But thanks to my Sayang, a new pair is now mine! Yeay! haha.

Wedding plans are okay. Its going on, but at a slower rate. Things happen that makes me wanna settle for a nice little solemnization ceremony instead, without all these planning for a reception. Seriously. Coz in the end, its the marriage that matters, right? Furthermore, I'd prefer a small, intimate ceremony that's perfect, rather than planning for a reception that in the end I can't call my own.

But I've made peace with the demons in my head. Whatever will be, will be. I should focus my energy on bigger things that I can control.

Like my internship report. ugh. It's on a standstill right now. I know I should be finishing them up real SOON, and I will. At least I hope so!

I'll be meeting up with my ex-boss tomorrow. He has to give me my internship evaluation, and possibly the one month and a half pay that he owes me. Wish me luck people, and do send in a few doa my way!

Okay. Gotta do some work now. A little for the office, and a bit for my internship report. Off to dinner with my Baby after that, then home and straight to bed.

Later people. Have a great week! Ciao~

duit merah.

Hello people~

It's been a while since my last post. My new job with the Islamic finance events/publishing company is terribly hectic, I can only spare a few quick messages through Gtalk to keep me in touch with Ikin or Azzura and whoever was online. I don't check my blog, my facebook, and my other emails other than Gmail.

It's hard to say if I love my job. I do like it coz it involves writing word play. But sitting in front of the pc for a minimum of 7 hours everyday, and doing the same thing for the whole time... it gets really mundane. Especially when you don't really know what some of the terms mean. For instance, subprime mortgage. What the...?

But I LOVE the environment. The office is not that big, but it does seat around 20 people comfortably. There's a proper feel of an office attached to it... I have a table with ample space, my own telephone, and I've received my first pay although I've been at the place for only one week. We have our own pantry and, and today - well this is lame, but still exciting - I get my own stationaries; pens, ruler, stapler, the whole works. I even have my own access card! COOL!

haha.

But of course, there's also a bit of a office 'he says, she says'. Basically some people don't like some other people. and the other people feels the same way towards the first group of people. It's not too much that I can't handle, but being a person who tries not to get involved [though I'm sure at one time I'll probably will], I hope they will just sort out their differences.

But then again, you can't really escape these things no matter where you work. If it's not one thing, it's another, right? And this isn't too bad... It's still normal. Nothing too bad.

Dang it. Why am I talking about my jon when I should be relaxing for the weekend anyways? [Yeah, like I'll relax... there's still the wedding planning and the damned internship report! blergh!]

Alia made cupcakes today. Well, she prepared the cupcakes in advance and we did the icing together a few hours ago. It's so obvious we're newbies at it, but I don't think it turned out too bad.

Oh goodness. I'm tired. Maybe I shouldn't have started talking about my job first. Sigh.

Oh well. Till the next time [most probably next weekend]... Ciao~

staying strong is hard to do.

It was easy for me to vent out my anger and frustration. About my job, about the wedding, and till last year about college.

An on-going correspondence with a friend through facebook kind of set my feet on the ground again. I am not saying that what I'm going through is easy, or to say "ohmygod I have it soooo good, I shouldn't be fretting!" We all have different priorities in life, although some are more serious than others. And as time go by, as we get older, and things evolve around us, our priorities will shift. Mine are important for me, as it is to each and everyone of us.

But when I whine and vent, and thinking that my life sucks, I somehow pushed the thought that there are other bigger things in life, that other people need to let it out and cry as well. And yes, I am still venting, but I need to listen to others too, especially when it is as serious as what my friend is going through.

Her situation is tough. I empathize with her with a few of the issues she is going through, though on a few others... I can only imagine how she manage.

My prayers go out to you, Sha, and I have faith that you will persevere amidst all the madness.

shortie

Nothing too long this time, just a short one to give you guys an update on what has been happening.

Got myself a new job as an Editorial Executive in a company specializes in Islamic finance news, training and events. I'll start work at the end of the month. I know my employer isn't too happy about me leaving, but the choices I make are for my future, and mainly for my sanity. I deserve a job that pays, and they deserve an employee who doesn't diss them.

I was kind of freaking out at the thought that I probably won't be getting the job... the first interview with the Editor was fine, but the second one with one of the company's Managing Director was unnerving! But Alhamdullilah, the Editor must've put in a good word for me; seriously if I could, I would have danced when I got the news haha.

So wish me luck at my new workplace! woohoo!

It's not right, but it's OK

It's not easy to plan for a wedding, look for a new job, and working full-time all at once. Come the end of March, things will be a lot more hectic when I start doing my internship report. There were tears, screams and fights along the way, and admittedly I went through two days of mentally giving up on everything, but despite it all I am feeling very optimistic right now.

There has been a few callbacks and more interviews are expected, but I do hope that the callback I'm going for tomorrow will result positively, and I can then stop my search and concentrate on finishing my tasks at Fusionmind. But until it's finalized, I'm going to resist indulging too much information, and just take it as it comes.

I've decided to take full-charge of the wedding planning [although I haven't really spoken to my dad about it, don't know how he's going to feel about it]. I have a much clearer vision of my reception right now, and I am loving the image that has been conjuring up in my head. I don't know how to really explain this feeling; I'm nervous as feck, and yeah I do get too stressed about some details, but I'm actually feeling very, very good.

By the way, Ikin and freaks... the realization that I AM GETTING MARRIED IN FOUR MONTHS is slowly, but finally, hitting me.

I think I'm hyperventilating.

whee~

Most [if not all] would know by now that I am looking for a new job, and that I've tendered my resignation at my current workplace, so I'll be leaving at the end of this month. I don't wish to go into details on why, but suffice to say, they can't provide me with what I want, and I don't feel its necessary for me to contribute to the company anymore. My boss took it like a man, and he responded in a very gentleman-like way.

I find it a pity to leave the job [coz I do love it], but pity alone doesn't roll money into my bank account now, does it?

Been called for two interviews last week, and one for tomorrow. Sent out numerous resumes through different channels, and I'm hoping that I'll hit the jackpot soon. But of course, I'll be sending many more... so if you know any company that's hiring, do let me know yea?

Wedding plans are going pretty well, but am stalling a little bit with all the employment thing going on. Need to finalize at least a few things by the end of the month, and of course I'm hitting a few bumps, but generally am not freaking out yet [should I be worried for not being worried? hmm]. I'm particularly glad with my decision to not have the solemnization and reception at my home, as My Sayang's reception has been pushed to the next day at noon instead of evening. So yeay me! We're going to be dead tired as it is, and I'm just thankful that we get to minimize any fatigue haha.

Had a weird dream last night, about how on my wedding day, everything was not properly planned. Freaked me out a little bit, but then I actually woke up wanting to laugh out loud rather than going "oh no it's going to be a disaster!" I remember someone told me that, if you want your dream to come true [if it's a good dream of course], don't talk about it for 2 weeks. If you talk about it before the 2 weeks period ends, then the dream won't come true. Why 2 weeks, who knows. But I'm not taking any chances.

So there you go. An update. Till later!

tagged by ikin. fun.

Here are the rules:

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog

I love spicy food, but I can't really stand the heat.
I always ask for extra chili, and you can bet that I love any Malay dish with the word sambal in it. When eating out at TGIF or Uno or anything similar, Tabasco sauce is a must. So is a glass of plain water. Well, a jugful is more like it.

I also love the taste of petai, but I hate eating it on its own!
I like it as it adds additional taste. It's not like I hate petai because of the smell my body would emit [and we all know how gross that can be], but I just hate the taste of the veggie.

My Sayang and I have NO IDEA the exact date we got together.
Seriously. We know that it's sometime at the end of May, or early June 2001, but we just can't pinpoint the exact date. So we did the next best thing: celebrate on the 31st of May.

I can't stand the taste of chocolate combined with lemon or lime, though separately, I can't live without them.
Hmm. Another one on food. I wonder what that says?

I fidget. A lot.
Nothing new here.

I haven't bought my own phone since the Nokia 3310 model back in 2002.
Thanks to My Baby's hand-me-downs whee~

I am accident-prone.
Occasionally, I get bumps and bruises that I just can't remember where they come from.

The seven people I'm tagging are:
Azzura
Noran
Adik
Along
Anim
Saddiq
Najeeb
(Noran, Adik, Along, buat kat supcendawan k? hehe)

That's all. I kind of had to really think about them, so that sucked. haha.

I WANT TO RIP SOMEONE'S HEAD OFF.

Ikin, you spoke too soon about the whole positive blessed thing. It's not your fault, it's not mine. It's hers... she's the one who got me into this mess from the very beginning, and she can't be found.

I do hope I'm wrong. For my sake, for everyone's involved sake, and especially for her sake. Coz if it's true, if indeed she did what I heard she did, oh she is going to get a piece of my mind.

I thought she would be able to help me out... We know each other's situation. I don't fucking care about why she's doing this. All the thoughts that went on my mind earlier on, about how could someone I consider a friend do this to me and leave me with not even a clue of what I'm supposed to be doing. Seriously, I realize now that it's not worth my time. But damn it, have the decency to be honorable about it. So she has problems, and yeah she should be thinking of herself first before anyone else's well-being. I'm with her in that. But leaving things behind unannounced and not picking up phone calls... that's fucking low.

Like I said, I could be wrong and I PRAY that I am wrong.

But until she apologizes to me, nothing is stopping me from being pissed about it.

dejavu

So I was doing the questionnaire that Ikin tagged me to do, and then I got to question number 20, and it said "Do you make up your own word?" My answer of course was YES... and then I thought, hey... this is WAY too familiar. Checked my blog for a little bit under the tag 'random stuff', and sure enough I answered the same questionnaire on December 24th last year. haha.

So if you're curious, read it here.

On another note, things are happening that made me question a lot of things, and though I have made my decision of what my next course of action will be, the necessary measures to implement it has yet to be taken. But I'm getting there. Thanks to my Babe, Ikin, Lyana, Azzura, Animz, and a few other people for lending me an ear, a shoulder, and a little spot in your heart for me. I feel so blessed.

I am so blessed.

Okay I should be writing a longer post, I know. And I will! hehe :D

thank yous

To Noran, Azzura, Animz and Along:
I know I've mentioned this in my previous post, but thank you so very much for a wonderful pre-birthday lunch. Thanks for being there for me... and the presents too! You guys are my rock!
And I am really really grateful that you guys are willing to sacrifice some time in helping me out with my wedding. Anim, I know my preparation freaks you out a little bit, but you know that I - well, we actually - are more than happy to help you with yours.

To my sisters and Baba [although you guys won't be reading this probably]:
I'm not much of a Victoria's Station fan, but that you for a great dinner! The cake filled me up so bad, but who cares?! haha. Thanks Kak Hani for those lovely shoes. The thought that in 5 months I will no longer be staying at our home, actually makes me sad... though I know that you guys are rejoicing that I won't be asking for money anymore! And the length you guys would go for July... well that goes without saying...

To Lyana, Michael, Johan, Ko Ko and Chan:
hahahaha honestly, I saw the surprise coming from MILES away! I wasn't sure of course, so it wasn't a complete failure. I didn't know that caramel cheesecake tastes so good! And thanks for the perfume Lyana... the reason why it reminds me of you is not only because you bought it for me, but because the smell is so you!

To Ikin, Adik, Nana, Arnie, Alia:
Your birthday wishes means so much to me, even though you guys couldn't be there with me. I do wish that you guys were though... *sad face* hehe.

Last, but of course, never ever the least... My Sayang:
Dinner at PJ Hilton was great, the books are a great addition to my little library. I don't know how to say this without being all mushed yup, but here goes: I love you lah. You're so annoying it's endearing, and I don't know anyone else who can love another person by being jahat. Not jahat in its truest sense of course, but... oh well you know what I mean.

--------

haih. I heard a saying once, that true friends not are not the ones who stay with you during your tough times, but those who would also share your good times with you. I can't be sure where I read it, or who wrote it... and I definitely can't that the saying is valid haha. But think about it: If your friends doesn't even share your happiness, what's the guarantee that they would stick with you when you're down and under?

chocolate fudge with cherry on top

My weekend started on Wednesday.

Yup... Wednesday. It was a public holiday... Thaipusam, to be exact. The next day, Thursday was actually a working day. But I had a terrible headache [been having it every day for the second week in a row, in fact] so I took the day off and just... slept. Woke up around the eve and decided to do some things for the impending wedding. Didn't do much, but at least something to get moving.

Went to work the next day, only to find that THERE WAS NO INTERNET CONNECTION in the whole of UTM City Campus. Since my work are mostly online, I had no choice but to do nothing. It may sounds fun to some - whee no Net connection, no need to do work! - but it wasn't. I was bored, and the fact that I knew when Monday comes I'd be swarmed with things to do only made matters worst. But in the end, I went off to home from the office around 8.30 pm anyways; decided to help the others out with the magazine [and I found one thing to do that doesn't require the Net].

And then, Saturday. Ahhh. Did nothing but watch TV the whole day. Basically I watched movies that I've seen over and over again. I don't know about you, but Enough starring Jennifer Lopez isn't too bad. With all that female empowerment theme going on, it's actually a decent movie. Found out that Alia was admitted to Ampang Puteri due to high fever from her brother, my Sayang, and decided that I'll visit her after the outing with my girls the next day.

Sunday came, and is leaving in an hour or so. I have to admit, this is one great Sunday. Went out with my freaky babes for a pre-birthday lunch, where Along paid for my lunch, Zura and Animz got me presents from Australia, Noran entertained me with her wackiness, and the eating frenzy of a loverly chocolate mousse cake bloats me till now, courtesy of Azzura [who actually took the trouble to go back to the car after settling in at the restaurant as to not ruin the cake surprise]. Walked a little after the nothing-to-shout-about lunch at Lemon, The Mines, and decided to sit down again at a kopitiam to discuss some wedding-related things. Not just mine, but Anim's as well. We didn't get to talk much as my Sayang picked me up after only 30 minutes [the fact that we tend to have 'intervals' during the kopitiam session didn't help too haha!], but it made me see something. Something that I've known, but being reminded of it gave me warm, fuzzy feelings inside.

I have a wonderful set of support system.

These are the girls that I know I can count on. They're prepared to go the distance for me; namely to Nilai 3 haha. They threw ideas at me, made me think about things for the wedding I otherwise didn't have a clue about, and they're here for me when I need them. When they in all honesty do not have to be. We're even having meetings now to plan the weddings!

But of course, if Ikin - and Lyana too - were around today, it would have been perfect. But I'm not complaining.

Like I said... warm, fuzzy feelings.

omg six more months.

1. Was 2007 a good year for you?
It was fine. The last quarter was especially good for me.

2. What was your favorite moment of the year?
There's a few. Graduation, engagement, Ikin's wedding, Kusa's shop opening... I'm fickle, so don't ask me to choose!

3. What was your least favorite moment of the year?
There's a few of that also. I don't want to elaborate.

4. What are your plans for 2008?
Work, get enough money to get married HAHA.

5. What countries did you visit?
haha NONE. Which reminds me... my passport expired last September.

6. What date in 2007 will remain etched in your memory?
21st October 2007, duh.

7. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
FINALLY graduated woohoo~

8. What was your biggest failure?
Not learning how to make a Subway. :D

9. Did you suffer any illness or injury?
Nay, nothing serious.

10. What was the best thing you bought?
hmm. Nothing extraordinary worth mentioning.

11. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
A certain person who was supposed to be a friend. But when she stop making effort to contact me, I guess I should stop calling her a friend already.

12. Where did most of your money go?
Transportation. And the occasional shoe-indulging activity. And food.

13. What did you get really really really excited about?
My engagement yeay!

14. What songs will always remind you of 2007?
Umbrella haha, and Hey There Delilah.

15. Compared to this time last year are you:
a) Fatter or thinner? Pretty much the same. I should be thinner. sigh.
b) Happier or sadder? HAPPY YEAY!
c) Richer or poorer? I earn my own money now, no longer depending on welfare :P But that does NOT mean I have money to burn!

16. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Lose weight. Play bowling with my Sayang. More sisterly-bonding with the other Syarifahs within the family.

17. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Whine. haha.

18. How will you be spending Christmas?
uhm sleeping. I don't know.

19. Which LJ/MySpace users did you meet for the first time?
I don't use LJ, and my Myspace is messed up.

20. Did you fall in love in 2007?
YES! Bobby's purring makes my knees go jelly~

21. How many one night stands?
Nyet none.

22. What was your favourite TV show?
Entourage, House, Grey's. I'm a TV junkie.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Such a strong word... but no.

24. What was/were the best books you read?
I wish I read more books last year... :(

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Eisley! Ingrid Michaelson!

26. What did you want and get?
To be graduated.

27. What did you want and not get?
A no-yelling relationship with my dad.

28. What was your favourite film this year?
American Gangster, Transformers.

29. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
Class till 7 p.m, then dinner with my Babe at Chili's, One Utama. It was my 26th, and I'll be 27 in 17 more days yeay!

30. What one thing would have made your year more satisfying?
To be able to graduate with honors boo >:(

1. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
A cross between ultra feminine and "beggars-can't-be-choosers" chic. haha.

32. What kept you sane?
Freaksters and my sisters. Why not my Sayang? Or Ikin? Coz they drive me CRAZY.

33. Which celebrity did you fancy the most?
Daniel Wu. He is delish~

34. Which political issue stirred you the most?
blergh. Not because I'm not interested, but... blergh.

35. Who did you miss?
My Mama. And oh, Azzura. But now she's back!

36. Did you treat somebody badly in 2007?
Hmm. I don't think so. If someone begs to differ, please let me know :D

37. Did somebody treat you badly in 2007?
Yes.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned this year?
When a friend decides to no longer be a friend, just let the person be and forget about him or her. You can fret and whine all you want, but what's the point when they don't feel the same way?

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year..
So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health in good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth, it was worth all the while
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right
I hope you had the time of your life.

-- Good Riddance, Green Day