celebrating big numbers!

Our birthdays are at the end of the month, and I am busy procrastinating haha.

Seriously need to start the planning soon. As of now, we have only order one dessert, and Hadi has agreed to take charge of the barbecue. But still no barbecue pit (which is kinda essential in BBQ parties), no cake, no cupcakes, no idea on the theme. No nothing.

Oh, I need to find a hand-puppet performer. Anyone knows where I can find one?

no longer ours.

From tonight onwards, Zoey is no longer ours.

Hubby first got Zoey when she was just a little kitten. About 2-3 months old I believe, back in June 2006. She is a result of an 'accident' that happened between two show cats; one Persian, the other Himalayan. She has luscious gray fur, and as a kitten it looked almost blue-ish.

When we first booked her via a friend, there was no way of telling what sex she was, so we opted for the name Kenzo. Why Kenzo? Coz my Sayang had a thing for Kenzo's Pour Homme perfume. He said that we would call the kitten Kenny if its male. You can't believe my relief when Kenzo turned out to be female! Kenny is so e-yew!

The kitten Zoey was playful. She liked playing with anything that moves haha. And naughty too; once I had to take care of Hubs' house when the family was away (hubs went for his Subway training in Australia and his parents were mostly in Indonesia at that time), and I would come to the house every two days greeted by Zoey's poop. Every single time. Its not that she doesn't know where the potty is - she hated being left alone with no one to attend to her. So she rebelled. I'd get so upset, but I knew that she's stressed out, and in the end I'd just be sorry for not being able to do much.

But as she got older, she's more... hmm... solitary. She's manja, but only when she wants to be. If she's not up to a tummy rub, she'd just ignore you. But if she wants someone to play with her or rub her to sleep, she would come to you and get on your tummy (if you're lying down) or on your lap.

We could always trust her to not wander too far and come back home in the end. She's not much of an explorer, that Zoey. Oh but she does like to occasionally drop 'gifts' for us. It started of with dry leaves. She'd purr to us to get our attention, and when we go to her, she'd drop one in front of our feet. And then she graduated to house lizards - at one time, it was still alive! Thank goodness she didn't bring us any rat!

She's not great with other cats. I don't know if its a Persian thing or if there's any reason to it, but if Zoey sees another feline, she would get defensive and/or run away from the cat. It'll take a while for her to adapt, and when she does, she'd take the 'i-don't-bother-you-so-you-don't-bother-me' approach. And she is scared of little toddlers too! Well this is understandable, of course... Kids that age tend to treat cats as they would their teddy bears or other toys.

So many other things I could write about Zoey. About how she likes to be rubbed between her eyes gently as a way to lull her to sleep. How she gave us tiny massages on our tummy when she's finding the perfect location to land herself and nap. And how she slides on the floor and sometimes can't stop immediately after running coz the fur on her paws are too long! Oh gosh I'm so going to miss that.

We had to give her up. She wasn't being treated fairly, and she wasn't getting the same attention as before. On our part, when Hamzah came into the picture, we couldn't allow her to enter our room anymore coz we didn't want Hamzah to develop any allergies. There were other factors as well that I don't want to mention, changes that she couldn't adapt to... and so she started rebelling. Hub's mom isn't too keen about having her around anymore, and so... :(

But Zoey's new family are wonderful, Alhamdullilah. The three children adore cats, and quite responsible. The mother seemed like a nice person too - she even told us that we're more than welcomed if we want to give Zoey a visit. So Insya Allah... Zoey will be very well taken care of.

But still... the idea of not seeing her everyday made me cry. I mean... 5 years. She's family to me and Hubs. But now she is someone else's family member... and that just tears me apart.

But we know its for the best.

So very nervous about tomorrow's interview. I'm telling myself not to be, because some things that makes me nervous in the first place (such as the lack of experience) is beyond my control, but that kinda made the whole thing worse.

This is my third interview since I first job-hunted, though the first one doesn't count coz it was with a headhunter firm looking for customer service reps for their clients which I declined. Midnight shifts are not very appealing. But anyways, I don't know what to expect for tomorrow's interview. I'm just hoping to be able to keep my act together and not make any major screw-ups or slip-ups *fingers crossed*.

Truth be told, getting the job and acing the interview is a long shot, and believe me I'm not exaggerating. I just hope to be able to make an impression deep enough to at least have them consider me to be part of their team.

one obscure blog post, coming up!

This is going to be one of those hazy, ambiguous blog post that I tend to do at times. It is not going to be hard to understand, so do read, ya? You just may not know what I am really writing about.

I have decided to not be bitter anymore. Some things happened in the past that made me question the intention of people close to me, when they decided to make big decisions regarding yours truly without really seeking my opinion.

But I see now that they want to help. I still don't agree with how they chose to do what they did, but I understand that they mean well.

I still worry of the future repercussions - if any - of agreeing to them, but someone dear told me that I shouldn't be too concerned about it. And he's right. I don't know what may happen in the future. Things may work out to be totally opposite of what I've been worrying about.

Furthermore, I don't see how I am going to happy if I keep on worrying like that. This decision they made is to benefit me, and will insya Allah last well into the future. The real problem I have is not the decision itself, but how they came to the decision.

So I've decided to place that part behind me. But admittedly, still keeping it closely behind so I can check on it once in a while. One can never be too safe or too sure.

So... that's it with the bitterness. I can choose to be bitter and spiteful about this whole thing, but no one will benefit from that. I am afraid it will only drive me away from the people I love.

I certainly don't want that.

Bore.

Next time my husband plays paintball out of state, I'm tagging along. Sure I'll be bored coz I can't be at the field for too long with Hamzah around, but at least I won't be missing my Sayang too much.

Plus, its boring to just stay at home too.

But oh well. Lyana may be able to provide me with a little salvation tomorrow, if she recovers from her flu and cough in time. She's going to start work again on Monday, and I'm not sure how her weekend schedule are going to be like at her new workplace, so it might be a while before I get to see her on a Sunday again.

So here's hoping for a healthy Lyana! *crosses fingers*