So.

I think its pretty much set (kot?) that I will soon start look for a job, possibly to begin in December or January. Which also means sending Hamzah to a daycare/nursery.

Initially I wanted to start working a few months after giving birth to the little Lion, but hubby wasn't keen on sending him to a nursery, so we waited till mommy finds a permanent nanny/maid to look after Hamzah. But he's already 8 months old, and there is no sign of a new maid, so I guess its time to stop waiting.

Working with hubs is great and all... I am only busy at the beginning of the month! But there has been changes in Subway as whole that made that early month workload easier to handle... It seems silly to continue with the company when I don't really do much.

But truth be told... I don't know how I'm going to deal with the fact that I won't be taking care of my Hammyboy for 8-9 hours each weekday. The thought of it honestly scares me. But then again... not being able to provide the best for him is much scarier. And how can we afford buying our own place by the end of 2011 with the money we make currently?

I don't know lah. In an ideal world, I want to be a stay at home mom and make a substantial amount of money so I don't have to go to work. But the ideal world is not realistic for us at the moment.

I hope I'll be able to find work in an industry that I love. Writing is top of the list, of course. Communications, too. Insya Allah :)

Right now, I'll continue enjoying waking up to Hamzah's smiling face, bathing him with his giggles filling the room, watch him crawl (he's getting so good at it already!), mimic him when he cries for attention (yes I am a bully :P), and sleep by his side.

Hah. Camne nak kerja ni.

the obligatory new year blog post

Seriously, I am still grasping with the idea that its already a whole new different year.

I felt like 2009 just sorta passed by me. Like there's so much more that I could've done to make it a better year, but time ran out.

I did not achieve any of my resolutions that i made last year; I did not lose weight, I did not find any sports that I enjoyed doing, and I'm kinda lacking in the 'do more stuff' part as well. I find it funny, and only a tad bit disappointed. Resolutions senang camtu pun susah nak keep, kan? :P

So what happened last year?

I worked only until the first seven months at RedMoney, where I stayed for a total of a year and four months. The weekly deadline took its toll on me, and I find myself unable to offer them any more than what I already was. I plateaued at work. And it seemed so obviously unfair to the bosses who had high expectations of me. :/ Plus, I was a lousy business writer. And that fact is emphasized by the fact that I have not much interest to write about the banking and finance sector anyways.

So what did I do? I left the company, and joined my hubby handling his Subway shops. I have more time now. And admittedly, sometimes more than what I needed. I miss the hustle and bustle of having a 9 to 6 (sometimes 9 to whatever-time-we-finish-with-the-newsletter) job, but I love love love spending time with my Boo. And I definitely appreciate the free time I have... my pregnancy is not exactly a breeze, and there are a lot of days when I just couldn't get up on time to go to work.

Its one of the perks of working with your husband as your boss :)

Ah. And the pregnancy. We confirmed my pregnancy on Tuesday, 7th July. Our baby was detected at a very early stage of pregnancy... 4th week to be exact. It has been such a rollercoaster ride so far; emotionally and physically. But I remind myself to always be thankful for Allah's huge gift for me, even when I was puking my guts out in the bathroom :P

Less than 2 months and a half to go. 9 weeks to be exact. I remember having a conversation with one of my bestie Ikin, when she was telling me online that she had 9 weeks to go, and I thought, "9 weeks? It's still a long way for me to go." Dang it, it felt like yesterday!

And how could I forget, the US trip! It was one of the best 2 weeks of my life! I still wish for more time to be able to go to more places and do more things, but I'm being hopeful for another trip to the States, insya Allah. New York City and Washington DC was obviously the highlight of the trip. Atlantic City was kinda dead at that time of the year, so there was nothing to really shout about. Lyana is singing a different tune I'm sure; she's over in NJ/NY for new year's eve! *reeks with jealousy*

What else, what else. hmm. Tu je kot?

As for things that I look forward to this year - there are a few. Parenthood is obviously top of the list. People tell me that I will make a great mother, that my Sayang will be an awesome dad. To be honest, I don't know that yet. I don't think taking care of nephews and nieces would be sufficient practice (if at all) for parenthood... It's going to be a whole different ball game. I do believe, however, that we're going to do our very best. We have so much to learn, but with the many people we trust and love around to give us pointers, insya Allah it won't be a daunting task.

And if possible, I want to travel a little bit more. Yes, with a little one on tow. And when our boy is bigger, I hope to be able to decide as to whether I should go back to school, take up a short course on writing (I wonder if there's any available in Malaysia?), or get back into the working world. Makeup artistry class has to wait... I don't think I'll be able to come up with the money for it yet.

I hope to see my Babe win more medals in paintball tournaments. And... I want to lose a significant amount of kilos by the end of the year hehe. And ooh, to get my pavlova before my bun pops out of the oven! haha :D

Okay this post is long enough.

Happy 2010, people. Regardless of whether you make resolutions or not, I hope you'll achieve everything you hope for this year. But do remember that your family and loved ones are your pillar of strengths, so don't go breaking their hearts.

Old is gold.

Watched the animated movie Up with my hubby tonight when we were at my dad's. I've heard that it was sad, but I didn't expect to cry buckets within the first 5 minutes of the movie.

For a few seconds I thought that it was my hormones overreacting, but even my babe said over and over again: 'This movie is sad!'

For the remainder of the movie and afterwards, I keep on thinking about the relationship between Carl and Ellie. Circumstances are different, but I pray and I hope that my Sayang and I will grow old together as loving and caring in our golden years, as we are right now. Even more so, Insya Allah.

Just like Carl and Ellie.

Amin.

almost like a miracle.

Today, Friday 27th November 2009, on Aidiladha, I finally felt my baby's first kicks.

Not the fluttering kind that friends and baby books said I would feel initially (at my stage, its a bit too late for flutters), but these are real, solid bumps on my tummy. Three times, at least.

I was wondering when I would feel it. I wondered the most, I think, yesterday. It has already been 25 weeks, and by this time usually moms-to-be would already feel some kind of routine activities from the baby. Me? Not much. Close to nothing, in fact. Frankly speaking I was not too worried about the inactivities; I was anxious for it to begin.

But today was... wonderful. The first that I realized was in the morning when I just woke up, then at my Sayang's grandparents' place while I was lying down, and the last was when we were in the car on the way back from my dad's.

Hoping - and praying - for many more. :)

Alhamdullilah. It makes me even more thankful and in awe of Allah and His gift. :)

the tale of the three kittehs

Alia has become some sort of an adoptive parent to three little kittens we found in a box outside our house on Saturday morning.

Now, the box was not left by some inconsiderate stranger who did not want to care for little kittens outside our gate. Instead, the box was actually moved from our house in Shah Alam from the old house in Cheras two days before. Initially we didn't know how that could've happen. One of our most popular assumption was that the mommy kitty has moved the kittens from its original birthing place due to a threat, and found our little box outside the kitchen door the best place to hide her babies.

But upon investigations (chewah!), we found out that the mommy kitty gave birth to the kittens at our old house in Cheras, and we've brought the kittens to our place in Shah Alam by accident. How did we come to that conclusion? Because we went to the old neighborhood today for a wedding, and found that one of the windows on the house's first floor was open, and there were cat's pawprints all over that area.

It is still an assumption, but its the only one that makes the most sense.

I can't imagine the stress the mommy is going through. She's probably frantic right now, searching for her little ones :(

But at the moment, we've decided to focus on the problem at hand: how to take care of these kittens. They're newborn, and their eyes are not yet opened, and feeding them started out as a bit of a challenge.

For my babe and I, there's a sense of dejavu in the whole situation. We were here before. About 2 years before our princess Zoey came into the picture, we took in three little kittens left abandoned at my college in Langat to our place, and we tried so hard to take care of them. But then one by one... they didn't survive :( So when the both of us found out about these new kittens, we were wary. But worried. We are still hoping. And in my case, I try very hard not to get attached to them. But at the same time... its so hard to keep a distance!

Anyway Alia persisted, and the maids are helping out a lot, and Alhamdullilah it seems like the kitties are responding well to Alia's brand of TLC. Well... at least two of them are. The third one is looking a little bit sicker and frailer than the other two. But no bad thoughts! Must stay positive :)

Hopefully, Insya Allah, we will get to nurse them to health. And keep them, love them, play with them.

Amin!

celebrate good times, come on!

Hello all~

I had quite an eventful weekend. The family celebrated Kak Hani's belated birthday with dinner on Saturday at Madam Kwan's. It was a great night because of my awesome family... but the food was a letdown. It wasn't that bad, it's just... average.

On Sunday afternoon we went to Dina's kindergarten's year-end party/concert. She was absolutely adorable! She is also the top of her class among five-year olds, so we we're beaming! Like seriously beaming! Its amazing how the kindergarten teachers get the kids to behave during the concert... But of course, all hell broke loose when the concert ended and the buffet began.

And later that night a birthday dinner for my babe's brother, Fen (who shares Hani's birthdate!). Dinner was held at The Ship... Awesome sirloin steak! I was too full for dessert, but still managed to finish up Alia's vanilla ice-cream haha.

I thought it was a great weekend of celebration. The celebration of life, its progresses, and how we grow older (but not necessarily wiser!).

Talking about birthdays; Insya Allah if all goes well, today will mark the arrival of a very adorable and loved baby boy into the world! Congratulations in advance to Bad and Ikin! I pray for a safe labor and delivery for both mama and baby, Amin! Can't wait to see the three of you soon :)

And a moment of reflection:
Kak Hani said something to me and Kak Azfa in the car on our way back home from Dina's concert; that birthdays should be celebrated by celebrating the mothers that gave birth to us. I was struck by how obvious and simple that notion is, but somehow most of us -including me - fail to notice that. We shouldn't be asking our moms for birthday presents; we should be giving them flowers, chocolates, that bottle of perfume she's been eyeing, etc. Or visit her grave if she has passed on.

I'm not saying that we should do without partying for our birthdays from this moment onwards, but that we should include our mothers, one way or another, in it.

:)

hello.

Yeah I know. Its been ages! As to why, well... the same old reason lah. Nothing much to write about, so I didn't.

But today, something popped up. One of my bestie Lyana wrote a letter for my child, and I just have to share it.

Click here, and you'll see.

It made me cry. Not one of those boohoo tears everywhere kinda cry, but one where you were smiling one minute and suddenly OMG there's water in my eyes!

It made me so grateful that our baby - who might be a boy ;) - is so loved even when he is still in my womb by Lyana. And by other friends and family as well, and the realization made me want to cry even more.

I'm feeling like gold at the moment :)

But not so golden is the fact that my hubby's right ankle is hurting pretty bad since Sunday. Totally unrelated, I know... but it worries me. And do you know how frustrating it is to see someone you love moan in pain, and there's nothing you can do to make it better?

And oh, its kinda belated I know, but Syawal is a month-long celebration, so Salam Aidilfitri to all!

haha.

the first in '09

It seems like not blogging for long periods of time has become a habit of mine. It's not because that I don't have any time at all to spend in front of the pc, typing away; I just don't have enough of it. I'm not the kind of person who would get online for the sake of blogging, hence I only update the blog only when I am truly free, and I don't have much to do, online or off.

Getting back on the time factor... its just insane. Like I said, not to the point that I don't have time for anything, but it takes a lot of in-advance planning just to have dinner or lunch with my babes, for instant. Its been a long while since my Sayang and I ever went on a proper date, and besides KLCC, I haven't been to malls for the longest time.

This is not acceptable when, Insya Allah, a baby comes our way.

Hopefully, things will improve once we move permanently to Shah Alam [and no, its not our own house but the in-laws']. And come April, once the finance class is over and done with, we'll have two extra evenings during the weekdays to play with. Maybe then I'll have time to do things I want to do, and to do things I know my Babe wants me to do more of...

It'll come through, I hope.

It will be the 18th day of January in a few moments. I've been meaning to do sort of like a lowdown of the significant happenings in 2008 to me and my Sayang. I haven't had the chance, and Ikin kind of did it a lil bit late into the month as well, so why the hell not?

A lot of things happened this year. On the very bright side, I am now a wife. I am surprised at how much being married does not shock me; I was prepared to go through some serious changes. But so far there has not been much difference in how I conduct my daily life. Except for the fact I see a lot more of my Boo. I guess it has a lot to do with how I am not able to do a lot of 'wifely' stuff. Insya Allah, when we get our own place, I will.

I also got a my first stable, real paying job this year. And roughly 9 months later, I got promoted. Its a big deal to me... I wasn't expecting any increament or promotion until at least a full one year. It means more work, of course, but at the same time more trust from my bosses. So yeay! And an achievement of mine that is work-related is.... that I made several reports on Islamic finance without any financial background whatsoever. haha. Not recommended, though.

Other highlights include our Langkawi and Penang trips, as well as the arrival of Fadlan Ilham.

The lows? I left a job in March 2008 which I kind of had high hopes for. On the outside, it sounded like the perfect job for me. I got to write, and I got to learn so much. But I was late to realize that some things did not feel right: there was no confirmation letter after my internship ended, my pay was in cash with no documentation, I had to do a job meant for two people, and the editor of the magazine has no experience in editorial. Publishing is NOT editorial! blergh.

Also, someone close to me was - and still is - suffering some complications due to an ailment the person had two years ago. It does not seem to get better, but am hoping for the best this year.

Can't seem to think of anything else to add to this list. But all-in-all, it has been a wonderful year for me, and was quite stressful for the first half mostly due to work and wedding preparations. The second half fared better, but the stress didn't exactly lessen. Such is life.

As for my resolutions, well, it has never really been my thing. But I tought, what the heck?, so this year, I resolve to:

• Be fitter, and lose some weight in the process. Yes I know I say this often.
• Find a sport that I enjoy doing.
• Do more - bake, cook, write, theatre, movies, etc.

I'd add more to the list, but I'd like to keep this realistic.

So now I am off to bed.

And oh, by the way, its my birthday in roughly 11 days. ;)

reminisce.

I never realized that eating can be tiring.

But still, samprits and makmurs call out to me every time, at every houses I go to.

But Alhamdullilah. For the food, my family, and those I'm newly related to now that I am married to my Babe.

I miss the Raya I had when I was younger. The trip back to Ulu Kinta, playing bunga api to my heart's content [not mercun though, I'm such a coward], my late grandma's dodol, the image of my mom as she prepared the casing for the ketupat. All that hoopla.

I gradually grew up, but Raya was still an event I look forward to. We stopped making a priority to balik kampung a few days before the first of Syawal, but we try to go back when we can.

Then Mama passed away, and Raya became incomplete.

It's probably a stretch to say that the meaning of Raya has returned now that I am married. I won't lie. But things have definitely improved when compared to last Raya, for instance. Hopefully, things will further improve with each passing Syawal.

But one thing is for sure. I want my children [Insya Allah] to have great Raya celebrations. With bunga api, home-made ketupat, running around and making nuisance with the cousins, and so on. Yes, all that hoopla.

Who knows. Maybe by then Raya will have a new, better meaning.

i want cupcakes.

So much to do, so little time.

Seriously, if it was up to me [like, really up to me and I don't have to consider how others feel but I know I have to coz I respect my dad and I'm nice that way sometimes], I'd forgo the reception and have a nice, intimate akad nikah and lunch/dinner instead. None of this worrying about things that may screw up, or about arguments that will probably happen.

None of this worrying about not having enough money to pay off things.

Let's hope that after the wedding, I'll be able to recall my wedding preparations and remember the good parts of it instead of the negative ones. Amin.

Less than three weeks away till the big day. I think Time finally discovered wings and decides to fly and leave me behind. But you know, I can't wait for the things to come after three weeks. Of course, it means that I don't have to deal with this stress anymore, but it also means that I get to be Mrs. Ezham Hafiez.

[I am right now trying to stop to say something silly to refute the romantic-ness of the above line. Kusa does that all the time; say something sweet and then ruin it by saying something like 'fuh ayat power'. I will NOT be like him! I will prove to him that we can be corny if we want to! Admittedly, this is hard. sigh.]

By the way, I've given up on trying to lose weight for my wedding haha. There's just so much stress going on, that I need my sugar and fatty food! :P

Work-wise, I am finally confirmed at my new workplace yeay! My two bosses, AM and AT [they're both Andrews so we sometimes refer to them by their initials] literally sang me praises in the confirmation letters. Not to brag, but I did improve a lot, and I'm hoping to improve a lot more so I can talk to them about more pay sometime soon. haha. And I love love love writing. Although admittedly, I find it hard to fall in love with the subject matter. [Islamic finance? Me? Srsly?]

I'm prompted to do the little meme that Ikin did on her blog. But alas, time my not permit me. Future in-laws are meeting my dad tonight.

Wish us luck!

a bridezilla in the making

Okay. Enough relaxing after finishing up the report. From this week onwards, it's full-on wedding planning, baby.

Two months. Two short months.

You know how crazy these few months had been? I was so busy and tied up with stuff, I didn't even realize until about 4 days ago that my anniversary is coming at the end of the month. And that 2 weeks ago (27th April to be exact) was supposed to be me and my Sayang's own version of Valentine's. I never forget details like these. Never.

Oh well. I'll have a lifetime to remember. And a lifetime to keep on reminding him and hit him on his arm if he doesn't.

It's not right, but it's OK

It's not easy to plan for a wedding, look for a new job, and working full-time all at once. Come the end of March, things will be a lot more hectic when I start doing my internship report. There were tears, screams and fights along the way, and admittedly I went through two days of mentally giving up on everything, but despite it all I am feeling very optimistic right now.

There has been a few callbacks and more interviews are expected, but I do hope that the callback I'm going for tomorrow will result positively, and I can then stop my search and concentrate on finishing my tasks at Fusionmind. But until it's finalized, I'm going to resist indulging too much information, and just take it as it comes.

I've decided to take full-charge of the wedding planning [although I haven't really spoken to my dad about it, don't know how he's going to feel about it]. I have a much clearer vision of my reception right now, and I am loving the image that has been conjuring up in my head. I don't know how to really explain this feeling; I'm nervous as feck, and yeah I do get too stressed about some details, but I'm actually feeling very, very good.

By the way, Ikin and freaks... the realization that I AM GETTING MARRIED IN FOUR MONTHS is slowly, but finally, hitting me.

I think I'm hyperventilating.

dejavu

So I was doing the questionnaire that Ikin tagged me to do, and then I got to question number 20, and it said "Do you make up your own word?" My answer of course was YES... and then I thought, hey... this is WAY too familiar. Checked my blog for a little bit under the tag 'random stuff', and sure enough I answered the same questionnaire on December 24th last year. haha.

So if you're curious, read it here.

On another note, things are happening that made me question a lot of things, and though I have made my decision of what my next course of action will be, the necessary measures to implement it has yet to be taken. But I'm getting there. Thanks to my Babe, Ikin, Lyana, Azzura, Animz, and a few other people for lending me an ear, a shoulder, and a little spot in your heart for me. I feel so blessed.

I am so blessed.

Okay I should be writing a longer post, I know. And I will! hehe :D

chocolate fudge with cherry on top

My weekend started on Wednesday.

Yup... Wednesday. It was a public holiday... Thaipusam, to be exact. The next day, Thursday was actually a working day. But I had a terrible headache [been having it every day for the second week in a row, in fact] so I took the day off and just... slept. Woke up around the eve and decided to do some things for the impending wedding. Didn't do much, but at least something to get moving.

Went to work the next day, only to find that THERE WAS NO INTERNET CONNECTION in the whole of UTM City Campus. Since my work are mostly online, I had no choice but to do nothing. It may sounds fun to some - whee no Net connection, no need to do work! - but it wasn't. I was bored, and the fact that I knew when Monday comes I'd be swarmed with things to do only made matters worst. But in the end, I went off to home from the office around 8.30 pm anyways; decided to help the others out with the magazine [and I found one thing to do that doesn't require the Net].

And then, Saturday. Ahhh. Did nothing but watch TV the whole day. Basically I watched movies that I've seen over and over again. I don't know about you, but Enough starring Jennifer Lopez isn't too bad. With all that female empowerment theme going on, it's actually a decent movie. Found out that Alia was admitted to Ampang Puteri due to high fever from her brother, my Sayang, and decided that I'll visit her after the outing with my girls the next day.

Sunday came, and is leaving in an hour or so. I have to admit, this is one great Sunday. Went out with my freaky babes for a pre-birthday lunch, where Along paid for my lunch, Zura and Animz got me presents from Australia, Noran entertained me with her wackiness, and the eating frenzy of a loverly chocolate mousse cake bloats me till now, courtesy of Azzura [who actually took the trouble to go back to the car after settling in at the restaurant as to not ruin the cake surprise]. Walked a little after the nothing-to-shout-about lunch at Lemon, The Mines, and decided to sit down again at a kopitiam to discuss some wedding-related things. Not just mine, but Anim's as well. We didn't get to talk much as my Sayang picked me up after only 30 minutes [the fact that we tend to have 'intervals' during the kopitiam session didn't help too haha!], but it made me see something. Something that I've known, but being reminded of it gave me warm, fuzzy feelings inside.

I have a wonderful set of support system.

These are the girls that I know I can count on. They're prepared to go the distance for me; namely to Nilai 3 haha. They threw ideas at me, made me think about things for the wedding I otherwise didn't have a clue about, and they're here for me when I need them. When they in all honesty do not have to be. We're even having meetings now to plan the weddings!

But of course, if Ikin - and Lyana too - were around today, it would have been perfect. But I'm not complaining.

Like I said... warm, fuzzy feelings.

a hindsight on the year that was 2007

hehe no. There's no hindsight. I made the title up just for dramatic effect haha.

But then again, oh my goodness. It's a new year already?! Now this is no drama, people! This is for real! It's already 2008!

Oh well. I can't say that the year has passed me by; there were a lot of things that happened to remind me of 2007. I guess I'm just reacting towards the fact that this year I will only be 3 years away from turning 30. Good news is, my birthday is less than a month away heheheheh~

So what happened last year? In a nutshell; I finished my studies, I graduated, I got engaged, and I've started working. The year had a rocky start, there were things that happened to people that I extremely care about, that I won't even wish upon my worst enemy. Towards the middle, things seemed brighter. And it was; within the last few months, more good things happened to me and the people closest to me in any other year.

And Insya Allah, more good things will happen in 2008. Kak Diana is giving birth to another baby (it's a boy!) at the beginning of May, and me and my Sayang's wedding date is set on a July weekend.

And I know I'm a day late for a new year wish, but here goes anyways: 2007 was a wonderful year for me, with great events and new possibilities. I hope that the year had been great for you as well, and may 2008 brings us grander things. Happy New Year! Much love, hugs and kisses, Mira~

hiatus mode: off

YESYESYES an update is due!

Why have I been silent for all this while? Everything, and nothing. haha. The major reason for my absence in the blogging scene is the simple, plain reason that I do not have any Internet connection at home, and I no longer come over to My Sayang's house as often as I did before.

So what have I been up to? Well, the highlight would be, of course, Ikin and Bad's nikah and wedding receptions. Here's a taste of what kind of loveliness I was surrounded with on one of the days:


This is taken on the day of the nikah, or solemnization ceremony. And this one is Ikin being oh-so-modelesque on the day of her reception in Melaka:



Thanks Arnie for the pictures. By the way, you still haven't given me the ones from the hotel reception.

[By the way, notice Ikin's luscious new locks? :P]

Another thing that has been taking my time is the preparing of my resume and cover letter for my internship. I've yet to send out any as I still need my testimonials and sorts from my lecturers, but insya Allah I'll start sending by middle of the month. I'm looking for a spot in a PR/advertising agency... so if you can help me out, holler at me! :)

There's also this other little thing that has yet to take up any of my time yet, but it sure will. Will let you guys know as soon as something is confirmed.

I'm missing a whole load of people right now; mainly Azzura and Ikin. It's damn obvious why I miss Ikin; she is after all my girlfriend. And her living in Tokyo... well. That's just like the bad, evil, negative version of icing on the cake. haha.

Azzura. I miss our mindless chatter on YM. The fact that I hardly get online now, and the fact that she doesn't get online as often as well until Friday is the only reason why I haven't spoken to her as I would normally would since like a week before Ikin's wedding. Emails are just not the same when you have to wait days for a reply, don't you think?

And I miss Lyana. Ohmygod I so wanna hang out with her! It's been a little bit close to impossible to see her now that she's working. And I've been canceling on her too... thousands of apologies, babe. But weekends are your days off, and I know you want to hang with Michael too, so we just have to be patient and wait till our time comes, okay?

So. Is this post good enough after a month plus of silence?

And also, I had a haircut yesterday! whee~

another college post. have i nothing else to talk about?

This week marks the last week of full time college-hood. Yes I have my final exams next week, but only for 2 days. And then there's my final semester starting from mid-August, but for 3 1/2 months my classes will only be on Monday. The end of the year is still quite a distance to go, and already I'm anticipating. For what, I've yet to discover.

I know that I complain about having to do assignments towards the end of every semester, and of presentations and exams and other college-related shit. And true, I just can't wait for all this to be over.

And by golly, I will miss it.

It's hectic as heck, but at least I still have time for things that I like to do, like catching a midnight movie on Thursday, or window shopping at 2 p.m. in the afternoon. By my own experience of 2-odd years working at The Body Shop and UPM's Graduate School, I know such carefree time will soon come to its end.

And I believe this is why it's important to have a job that you love; to minimize the days that you drag yourself to work.

But anyways. I guess it's one of those cases where you gotta give up something to gain something else. My free time for a secure financial status, self-actualization, and interestingly, freedom.

I think it's a fair deal.

future.

It's a nice feeling to know that prior to telling the class your age, they thought that you're at least 3 years younger, and one guy even went as far as saying that you look 18.

It's a nice feeling when they judge that solely on how you look alone, but I don't think you'll have the same fuzzy feeling inside if they said that based on how you've been behaving in class. [Which I hope is not the case coz obviously it's me I'm talking about.]

The end of the semester is nearing, and I'm getting an anxiety attack. Yes I am exaggerating, but the mere thought of doing my internship in [insya-Allah] August/September is exciting, but scary as heck. It'll be the phase in my life that I would call Long-Overdue; I should be at this stage in life at least 2 years ago. And that's what makes it so exciting, but the same reason is making me nervous. With no real previous employment and a few years of my life wasted on being young and stupid, the prospect of me doing PR is thin.

There's also the fact that I am rekindling my little hobby for writing, and though I still think my stronger point is talking endlessly rather than writing extensively, it does put pressure in one's mind to choose one passion over the other.

AND don't get me started on my dream of owning a make-up artist consultancy business!

Really, I don't feel like doing one thing and a few weeks, or even months into it, hitting myself so hard and say, "Lord why did I ever do this for?!"

But according to William Whewell, "Every failure is a step to success".

So I guess, here's to many many failures to come, and may I reap what I sow as soon as possible.

procrastinator at work.

my mid-term exam started today, and my first paper was Interpersonal Communication which ended 2 1/2 hours ago. it went better than i thought it would, and i wish i could say the same about my Philosophy paper on wednesday. i'm so worried! and yet i'm not doing anything about it! arghkt! haha. no one else to blame but me la kan?

i probably won't be getting my Disco Boogie, after all. i don't feel like explaining now, coz there is still a chance of me getting it... so i'll let you guys know when everything is confirmed. let's just wait and see whether i smile, or cry... okay?

it's getting late... i should head home now. more news later, Insya Allah.

ciao~

let's boogie all weekend!

yeay! my babe kusa is getting me a blythe for my birthday present, and ikin has placed the order on the net for me! which blythe, you ask? the Disco Boogie! i'm ecstatic! i'm getting a new girl, and it's a Disco Boogie! i've been wanting it since FOREVER, but the price in KL is murder, mainly because Disco Boogie 1st came out in 2002, so now it's limited in the market! ikin has managed to place the order and all i have to pay is the normal price blythe lovers pay for a normal, least expensive one! i'm so happy! happy happy happy! BLISS!

now... for the question that we always ask when a new girl comes: what should i name her?

hehehe. i wanna go somewhere, and give little jumps of joy for a while. later~