The Felinity of Bliss~

2nd week of work!

2011-03-21T12:52:00.002+08:00

At the rate things are going now, I think I should be able to blog everyday.

So yes... I've started on a new job. Web content specialist has such a nice ring to the ears, no? Except for the knowledge that I am no expert at all haha. Spent the first few days worrying because I thought I was also responsible for the company's website design... I even sent out a SOS text to hubs, wondering if I am the right fit for the company!

So far so good, Alhamdullilah. My direct boss is busy for the day, and I am left without much to do. Seriously bored right now. I will probably regret saying this, but I want to do something! Give me some work! :P

Oh well. Might as well enjoy it.

Obviously now that I am working, Hamzah is taken care by someone else during the day. We'd like to get a maid or a babysitter that can come to our house daily, but since its so hard to find any of the two options, we decided to send Hamzah to a nursery for the time being. To be honest, at this moment, I'm not very happy with a few things, but as long as Hamzah is not affected by it, then I'm happy. We did get an allergy-reaction scare last week, but its under control now.

I do miss him terribly, everyday. I'd go to my Facebook account every now and then to see his videos pictures. Which reminds me... I ought to take more pictures of him.

Ok going off to the bank to open up an account. Tambah koleksi.

celebrating big numbers!

2011-01-06T13:31:00.002+08:00

Our birthdays are at the end of the month, and I am busy procrastinating haha.

Seriously need to start the planning soon. As of now, we have only order one dessert, and Hadi has agreed to take charge of the barbecue. But still no barbecue pit (which is kinda essential in BBQ parties), no cake, no cupcakes, no idea on the theme. No nothing.

Oh, I need to find a hand-puppet performer. Anyone knows where I can find one?

no longer ours.

2011-01-05T01:48:00.002+08:00

From tonight onwards, Zoey is no longer ours.

Hubby first got Zoey when she was just a little kitten. About 2-3 months old I believe, back in June 2006. She is a result of an 'accident' that happened between two show cats; one Persian, the other Himalayan. She has luscious gray fur, and as a kitten it looked almost blue-ish.

When we first booked her via a friend, there was no way of telling what sex she was, so we opted for the name Kenzo. Why Kenzo? Coz my Sayang had a thing for Kenzo's Pour Homme perfume. He said that we would call the kitten Kenny if its male. You can't believe my relief when Kenzo turned out to be female! Kenny is so e-yew!

The kitten Zoey was playful. She liked playing with anything that moves haha. And naughty too; once I had to take care of Hubs' house when the family was away (hubs went for his Subway training in Australia and his parents were mostly in Indonesia at that time), and I would come to the house every two days greeted by Zoey's poop. Every single time. Its not that she doesn't know where the potty is - she hated being left alone with no one to attend to her. So she rebelled. I'd get so upset, but I knew that she's stressed out, and in the end I'd just be sorry for not being able to do much.

But as she got older, she's more... hmm... solitary. She's manja, but only when she wants to be. If she's not up to a tummy rub, she'd just ignore you. But if she wants someone to play with her or rub her to sleep, she would come to you and get on your tummy (if you're lying down) or on your lap.

We could always trust her to not wander too far and come back home in the end. She's not much of an explorer, that Zoey. Oh but she does like to occasionally drop 'gifts' for us. It started of with dry leaves. She'd purr to us to get our attention, and when we go to her, she'd drop one in front of our feet. And then she graduated to house lizards - at one time, it was still alive! Thank goodness she didn't bring us any rat!

She's not great with other cats. I don't know if its a Persian thing or if there's any reason to it, but if Zoey sees another feline, she would get defensive and/or run away from the cat. It'll take a while for her to adapt, and when she does, she'd take the 'i-don't-bother-you-so-you-don't-bother-me' approach. And she is scared of little toddlers too! Well this is understandable, of course... Kids that age tend to treat cats as they would their teddy bears or other toys.

So many other things I could write about Zoey. About how she likes to be rubbed between her eyes gently as a way to lull her to sleep. How she gave us tiny massages on our tummy when she's finding the perfect location to land herself and nap. And how she slides on the floor and sometimes can't stop immediately after running coz the fur on her paws are too long! Oh gosh I'm so going to miss that.

We had to give her up. She wasn't being treated fairly, and she wasn't getting the same attention as before. On our part, when Hamzah came into the picture, we couldn't allow her to enter our room anymore coz we didn't want Hamzah to develop any allergies. There were other factors as well that I don't want to mention, changes that she couldn't adapt to... and so she started rebelling. Hub's mom isn't too keen about having her around anymore, and so... :(

But Zoey's new family are wonderful, Alhamdullilah. The three children adore cats, and quite responsible. The mother seemed like a nice person too - she even told us that we're more than welcomed if we want to give Zoey a visit. So Insya Allah... Zoey will be very well taken care of.

But still... the idea of not seeing her everyday made me cry. I mean... 5 years. She's family to me and Hubs. But now she is someone else's family member... and that just tears me apart.

But we know its for the best.

2010-12-21T23:09:00.002+08:00

So very nervous about tomorrow's interview. I'm telling myself not to be, because some things that makes me nervous in the first place (such as the lack of experience) is beyond my control, but that kinda made the whole thing worse.

This is my third interview since I first job-hunted, though the first one doesn't count coz it was with a headhunter firm looking for customer service reps for their clients which I declined. Midnight shifts are not very appealing. But anyways, I don't know what to expect for tomorrow's interview. I'm just hoping to be able to keep my act together and not make any major screw-ups or slip-ups *fingers crossed*.

Truth be told, getting the job and acing the interview is a long shot, and believe me I'm not exaggerating. I just hope to be able to make an impression deep enough to at least have them consider me to be part of their team.

one obscure blog post, coming up!

2010-11-09T22:53:00.002+08:00

This is going to be one of those hazy, ambiguous blog post that I tend to do at times. It is not going to be hard to understand, so do read, ya? You just may not know what I am really writing about.

I have decided to not be bitter anymore. Some things happened in the past that made me question the intention of people close to me, when they decided to make big decisions regarding yours truly without really seeking my opinion.

But I see now that they want to help. I still don't agree with how they chose to do what they did, but I understand that they mean well.

I still worry of the future repercussions - if any - of agreeing to them, but someone dear told me that I shouldn't be too concerned about it. And he's right. I don't know what may happen in the future. Things may work out to be totally opposite of what I've been worrying about.

Furthermore, I don't see how I am going to happy if I keep on worrying like that. This decision they made is to benefit me, and will insya Allah last well into the future. The real problem I have is not the decision itself, but how they came to the decision.

So I've decided to place that part behind me. But admittedly, still keeping it closely behind so I can check on it once in a while. One can never be too safe or too sure.

So... that's it with the bitterness. I can choose to be bitter and spiteful about this whole thing, but no one will benefit from that. I am afraid it will only drive me away from the people I love.

I certainly don't want that.

Bore.

2010-11-06T10:40:00.002+08:00

Next time my husband plays paintball out of state, I'm tagging along. Sure I'll be bored coz I can't be at the field for too long with Hamzah around, but at least I won't be missing my Sayang too much.

Plus, its boring to just stay at home too.

But oh well. Lyana may be able to provide me with a little salvation tomorrow, if she recovers from her flu and cough in time. She's going to start work again on Monday, and I'm not sure how her weekend schedule are going to be like at her new workplace, so it might be a while before I get to see her on a Sunday again.

So here's hoping for a healthy Lyana! *crosses fingers*

while waiting for my son to wake up, i ramble.

2010-11-04T13:31:00.002+08:00

I need to find a job. Like... yesterday.

I got one interview sometime next week, Alhamdullilah. After sending out about 25 job applications, but still. Persistence is key, Insya Allah.

I was suppose to have another one, but I think the lady who called me up 'merajuk' with me for not being able to talk to her there and then. I was busy, nak buat macam mana kan? And I did call her afterwards and for the next two days after that. But hey, I took the hint. Their loss! Nyahahah~

I'm kinda hoping I'll be able to send out more resumes, get several more interviews (in case the one next week doesn't work out), and get a job within the next 2-3 months. The idea of working and not being with Hamzah during the day gets more and more unappealing with each passing day. But the fact that with more money, we will be a lot nearer to our dream of having our own home - and maybe a sibling for the Lil Lion - pumps me up.

Ada sesape tak nak hire a Communications graduate who hasn't worked for a year and a half? Lemme know okeh? :D

i make no apologies for the way i feel.

2010-10-22T00:26:00.003+08:00

Here's my policy when it comes to helping people: Be sincere and don't expect the person you've helped to reward you.

Namanya pun tolong, kan. So why in hell are you all emo when that person couldn't do a favor for you? What, you expect him to simply give you what you want just because you helped him before? And its not like he doesn't appreciate what you've done for him. Quite simply, you're asking for way too much. And seriously, you rubbing it in his face and reminding of all you've done to help in the past is quite disgusting.

And dude please la. Just because you do some stuff to help people, doesn't mean you can freeload on them whenever you want to.

And oh, here's another policy of mine: Don't drop any last-minute bombs that in the end could only make things worse for the person you are helping.

You wanna help, but there's strings attached to it, jangan bagitau at the last minute. Or financially, if you can't help out 100% of what the other person is asking of you, don't act like he knows he won't be getting what he wanted when you've said nothing to indicate anything of that sort. Your help is very much appreciated regardless of the amount you can give or the time you can spend, but lay down the rules earlier on so he can make informed decisions. Don't wait till the last minute.

I'm ranting. People frustrates me sometimes. Pisses me off.

Ate Prayed Loved :)

2010-10-19T17:47:00.003+08:00

Had a girlie movie and dinner session with Lyana last Friday, and we watched Eat Pray Love. I had reservations about the book, with the author being paid in advance to experience the stuff she's going to write about and all, but I love Julia Roberts. So I decided to leave my preconceptions behind, and to just enjoy the movie.

And I have to say, its rather good.

I describe the movie to Azzura as 'food for your soul', coz its not really a romantic comedy (romance didn't come till much later), and its not really a chick flick (although its main character is a woman). I'm not going to dwell too much about the story, but personally I think it has a very empowering message to everyone out there who is stuck in a rut and wants something else in their life - get off your ass and do it. I do find Ms Roberts' character Liz as a little ruthless sometimes, but when it comes to happiness, you gotta be selfish a little, no? Especially when its for everybody's good.

But I do have one beef with the movie - durian does not smell/taste like stinky feet! I'm not sure about Indonesian ones, but the good stuff from Malaysia is hella awesome! And to diss the fruit just coz one smooth talking Brazilian man with a heaven-sent smile said its not good is so chicken of Liz, since she went traveling to different countries in different continents alone. Durian seulas takleh plak try? hish.

But I digress.

Lyana's favorite part of the movie was Italy - where Liz ate. Looking at the food will make even anorexics change their mind and dive into a plateful of spaghetti. Bali - where she loved - is the most romantic part of the movie, I guess. I find that part of the movie as mediocre. I didn't find it as exciting as Liz's previous experiences.

But my favorite was India, the pray part of the movie. I don't know what I can say here that wouldn't give it out too much - so lets just leave it at emotional, shall we?

I wonder if the movie did the book justice. Anyone read the novel oops I mean memoir yet?

in a timely manner.

2010-10-16T21:49:00.003+08:00

Maybe it's just me, but I find time to be moving faster nowadays.

I'm always surprised when the weekend is here, and suddenly its a new Monday (I consider Monday as the beginning of the week and weekend as the sweet sweet ending). It's kind of... terrifying.

I wonder if it'll feel the same once I start work, Insya Allah? haha I'm sure I'll be hoping for the day to end a lot sooner, so I can get back home to Hamzah :)

So.

2010-10-09T00:54:00.003+08:00

I think its pretty much set (kot?) that I will soon start look for a job, possibly to begin in December or January. Which also means sending Hamzah to a daycare/nursery.

Initially I wanted to start working a few months after giving birth to the little Lion, but hubby wasn't keen on sending him to a nursery, so we waited till mommy finds a permanent nanny/maid to look after Hamzah. But he's already 8 months old, and there is no sign of a new maid, so I guess its time to stop waiting.

Working with hubs is great and all... I am only busy at the beginning of the month! But there has been changes in Subway as whole that made that early month workload easier to handle... It seems silly to continue with the company when I don't really do much.

But truth be told... I don't know how I'm going to deal with the fact that I won't be taking care of my Hammyboy for 8-9 hours each weekday. The thought of it honestly scares me. But then again... not being able to provide the best for him is much scarier. And how can we afford buying our own place by the end of 2011 with the money we make currently?

I don't know lah. In an ideal world, I want to be a stay at home mom and make a substantial amount of money so I don't have to go to work. But the ideal world is not realistic for us at the moment.

I hope I'll be able to find work in an industry that I love. Writing is top of the list, of course. Communications, too. Insya Allah :)

Right now, I'll continue enjoying waking up to Hamzah's smiling face, bathing him with his giggles filling the room, watch him crawl (he's getting so good at it already!), mimic him when he cries for attention (yes I am a bully :P), and sleep by his side.

Hah. Camne nak kerja ni.

Hello, blog. I've missed you.

2010-10-05T00:06:00.002+08:00

I read on Wikipedia that the author of Eat Pray Love, Elizabeth Gilbert, was paid in advance to write the book. Which is normal lah kan.

But wait a second. The book is a memoir, right? Of her life experiences following her divorce. So being paid in advance... How sure can we be that she did not seek out to experience things in her travels that would fit the book, and that she truly unbiasedly go through everything?

Seems kinda messed up.

But I haven't read the book, so maybe I shouldn't judge prematurely. And I am looking forward to catching the movie. Julia Roberts is almost always a delight to watch. (Except for her role as Tinkerbell in Hook. I don't get that one.)

And I shall end this post with a photo of my son. Gila takde kena mengena, I know. But he's sooooo enseemmmmmm~

Emran Hamzah is love.

2010-08-17T01:18:00.004+08:00

So many words to describe how much I love him, that I am speechless. My obsession, my everything, my reason to live.

I'm considering shutting this blog down. I don't mind having just one reader - counting myself - but my posts are lately very few and very far between.

Or maybe I'll keep it for the occasional rantings.

Decisions, decisions.

6 days late, but Selamat Berpuasa everyone.

Al Fatihah.

2010-06-24T13:16:00.004+08:00

Grandpa passed away on 6th June 2010.

20th June marked the 5th year anniversary since Mama's passing.

Then a dear uncle, Yop Taib, pulang the Rahmatullah on the very next day, 21st June.

June 2010 is a sad, sad month for me. Can't wait for the 29th to come (Hamzah will be 5 months old!), and then get this month over and done with.

I know that a new month does not make much difference - they are still gone and there's not much I can do about it. But I want to get this awful vibe off me, if that is even possible.

Furthermore, there are several things to look forward to in July - Hubby's birthday and our wedding anniversary just 3 days after that.

And maybe I can finally celebrate something this year. I realized a few days ago that I have yet to properly celebrate any special days of mine since 1st January 2010 - discounting my birthday of course, since I was busy having contractions and getting cut open and all that.

And off I go~

random thoughts.

2010-06-19T00:43:00.006+08:00

This post is not triggered off by anything anyone said to me or something that I've seen recently. This is just my personal observation.

Anyhoot.

I hate it when people say things like "Nanti dah kahwin tau la macam mana", or "Let's see if you can do things better when you have children". Or something along that line in any situation at all.

I can get quite concerned sometimes when when I see something that's a little bit off. Sometimes I voice it out. And then I get retorts like this... which I think is rude, and downright offensive.

Just because you are dealing with the situation poorly (either by doing/acting/saying too little or too much), that does not mean other people who have yet to experience married life/parenthood/fill-in-the-blanks will do the same. I believe I speak for the most of us human beings when I say that we try to learn from other people's mistakes. There's a possibility that we might repeat them, but I honestly don't get the negative attitudes that usually comes with those remarks. Gila tak supportive kot.

At the same time, I hate it when people voice out their dislikes over things that they are not experiencing themselves, just because they do things differently. I am not being hypocritical - there's a difference between having an opinion and being a bitch about it. If you don't like it, fine lah. But unless you are in their shoes, then you wouldn't know the real deal in its entirety. What you see is not always what you get.

So don't be stubborn about your ideals being the only right choice, and accept the fact that there are different routes to reach the same destination. No one likes a Ms./Mr. Know-It-All, anyways.

I wish.

2010-05-08T22:56:00.003+08:00

It really doesn't matter if you celebrate Mother's Day tomorrow, as long as you always appreciate her and have her best interest in your heart.

Furthermore, everyday is mother's day. But just like Valentine's, it is nice to have a specific day to do something special for that special lady in your life. Or, give her a break and send her off to a fully-sponsored spa. And I'm sure most moms would agree; a simple wish and a kiss on the cheek will do as well.

It'll be my first time. And I would love nothing more than to celebrate it with my own Mama. My God how I miss her. Celebrating it with her would be so different this time around. Not just because I will no longer take her and the day for granted. But also because now I KNOW what she went through to have all five of us. What she did for us. I'm sure my sisters felt the same when they had their kids.

What would I do? I would arrange for a sisters-and-Mama outing, have a hearty lunch at a cozy place where we could talk and chat and bitch. I would ask her how did it feel like when she had my eldest sister, how did she feel with five daughters... and with an adopted son. What did she find most challenging as a mother? How was I as a baby? What was my favorite food? When did I first give her a smile? Do all babies' poo smell as bad as Hamzah's?

And then we would all laugh together.

Wishful thinking.

I should stop before my tears starts to flow.

Deep breaths, Mira.

I won't be celebrating tomorrow, because my Boo is down with dengue. Its mild, but mild dengue equates to bad fever, coughing, back pain, joint aches, loss of appetite. Poor Sayang. But Alhamdullilah, his platelet count has increased. Rasa macam nak peluk dia and comfort him all the time, but its kind of impossible with a 3-month old infant.

But its ok. I will still be spending the day with my boys. And like I said, even a little wish and kisses on the cheeks would do. For now. Nyahahah.

So remember kids. Go hug her if you guys are in the same house. If you guys are not, then take a drive to her place, and then hug her. If she stays too far (and by too far, I mean in different states/countries all together; however, you in KL and she in Selangor DOES NOT COUNT) give her a call, and tell her how much you love her.

Coz you'll never know when the ability to do so will be taken away from you. And no amount of tears and wishful thinking can ever bring it back.

Happy Mother's Day.

heylow!

2010-05-05T12:00:00.002+08:00

Hey all~

I have to admit, the lack of posts here is not because I do not have the time... but Twitter has proven to be so much easier when I need to vent out ASAP or make a quick statement. But alas, when you have a lot to say, 140 characters is not going to cut it.

So here I am. Blogging away~

I just want to apologize to those who have been victims of my 'kejap ada kejap tak ada' online self. It comes with being a mother of an infant; Hamzah has a pretty predictable schedule, but there are times when he just cries and wants someone to hold him. So to those who feels like I've been abandoning them when they're about to tell me stuff - sometimes very important stuff - I am sorry!

Also, apologies for not being able to commit to outings as often as I used to. I simply don't want to go out too much... Siapa nak jaga chunky boy kan? I will usually go out if my Sayang can take care of him... or Mommy, if she's available. And this is why sometimes I have to plan my outing in advance. I don't like to depend on Mommy's maids too much. I trust them... but only to an extent. They're not very experienced when it comes to caring for a baby, so kalau setakat buat susu and tukar diapers tu boleh la lagi.

Furthermore... I'm quite particular about the way things are done when it comes to Hamzah. Hubby dearest called me a control freak. I call it being a mother.

This is also why I sometimes ignore well-meaning advice by some very good people. Well, some of the advice tu actually memang tak boleh pakai pun, but a rare few do makes sense... but its just that I choose not to go down that road. Like using a buai to lull babies to sleep, for example. I hear that babies sleep better and longer with swings. I'm sure it works for other people, but holding Hamzah to sleep and singing to him works well for us. And the little lion is beginning to sleep longer at night for the past few days... So why change a good thing?

Lain orang, lain la cara dia. Doesn't mean you are wrong... Doesn't mean I am, too.

I'm gonna stop for a while... Hamzah's due for susu anytime soon.

Till later~

warning: this is a baby-related post.

2010-03-27T14:00:00.000+08:00

... Well, most of the content is. :)

My confinement ended almost 2 weeks ago... and I haven't been able to stop eating sweet treats since then haha. Yeah I know I'm suppose to be losing weight and not add on to it, and really, I have no excuse for myself. Shame on you, Mira! I'm just waiting for the phase to go off... Assuming that it'll go away eventually :P

My Sayang and I went out last Monday to satiate my craving for Chili's, and in a way to 'celebrate' my new-found freedom. Wish I didn't binge on those artichoke dip, coz when my ribs arrived I could only eat like 5 small bites before giving up. Haih rugi. Oh well. Will be going out tomorrow to buy Hamzah's stroller (Quinny Buzz yeay!), and then a quick stop to Midvalley. Maybe Japanese for lunch? hmmm.

Hamzah has doubled his birth weight yeay! He was born 1.82kg, and last week he hit the 3.5kg mark. We expect his weight to be about 4kg by now. He's having a bit of a reflux problem, but not too much. One of the cons of formula-feeding I guess.

Oh and he's going to be 2 months' old on Monday whee! As for his milestones... he's begun cooing already, but not to anyone directly. He can hold his gaze on a person/object for longer now, and he tends to reach out to grab stuff sometimes... usually when he's angry haha.

And yes, I realize that at his age he should be able to do a bit more, like giving out a social smile and laughter, but Hamzah's adjusted age is only 2 weeks... so I pretty much treat him like a newborn when it comes to his developments.

Ooooh. He can also fit into some of his day clothes already! yeay! haha.

By right, I should be going back to work on 30th March... but ntah la. It seems that being a stay-at-home-mom is an option as well, if certain things go to plan. hmm.

By the way, expect a lot of baby posts from now on. Hamzah seems to be the only topic I talk about with passion nowadays.

Makan time!

oh baby.

2010-02-14T16:46:00.004+08:00

Emran Hamzah is 16 days old today. :)

The day of his arrival was a rollercoaster of emotions for me, and I bet for my Sayang too. He's premature by 6 weeks, and that alone sent me on a low so low it was unbelievable that I got back up. And then there were the other complications: my water leaked about a week before that, which could lead to an infection, the medication (Ventolin, I think that's the name) they put me on to prolong contraction was giving me palpitations and a fever, and to top it all off our baby's heartbeat was fast as well.

This is why the good doctor advised us to go for emergency Cesarean rather than normal delivery.

And the contractions. Oh my the contractions. Yes, I do realize that my threshold of pain is low compared to most people, and to some what I experienced may have been mild, but it was my body, and it was me who was taking all the pain, and those contractions were NASTY. They were only 2 minutes apart, and after about 15 hours dilation was only at 2cm. The epidural was necessary!

I remember thinking as we were driving to the hospital at 2am, "So this is how I'm going to celebrate my birthday, huh?" Lying on the hospital bed, being monitored by nurses with machines and devices to keep a close watch on me and the little one inside me. Somehow it didn't occur to me, while we were driving by Subang Parade, then I would be sharing my birth date with my son. Not only that, I was born 29th January 1981 at 4:10pm; Hamzah arrived at 4:43pm. The time was only apart by 33 minutes. How cool is that?

:)

In a way, I was glad that the doctor opted for emergency C-sec, rather than knocking me out completely. They made sure I couldn't see anything during the op, but from the moment the doctor said "Congratulations, its a boy!" to that time when I heard his cry for the first time, and to when the nurses and paediatrician check on him behind me and finally when he was presented before my eyes... I was fed on a natural high that kept on rising up. I was so happy he's arrived, I forgot that he was still a preemie.

And I thought to myself (or did I say it out loud in the operating theatre? hmm.) that this is the best way to celebrate a birthday ever.

And now at home, 16 days later, and he has been the reason for so many smiles and happy faces around the house. His Nenek and Tok Ayah can't seem to get enough of him, and his Mak Chu happily takes the duty of "Hamzah's Official Photographer" away from us. Even the boys' heart are melting... so does ours. For a premature baby, he is healthy, and Alhamdullilah fully formed physically. Not much else we could ask for, really.

Of course, caring for a child is not without its challenges. And this boy challenges us every night from 10pm to about 6am. I've cried and sighed and dozed off while trying to coax him to sleep, but in the morning I wake up, and I don't need any reminder that this is all worth it.

And my support system has been great. My Babe stays up with me when Hamzah cries and whines, and Mommy is always just a phone call away. I can just call my sisters when something is troubling me (and believe me, there is always something that troubles me everyday), and friends have offered helpful tips and advices.

I doubt myself sometimes, if I am really prepared and capable for this. I admit to wishing that things would be easier, that I can somehow know what would happen next. I fear about his development, about whether he is drinking enough milk, what would happen when I start work in April/May. But then I catch a glimpse of his smile, his frown, his pout, the movement of his chest as he breathe, and all my fears would somehow just disappear, albeit for just a brief moment.

I honestly never knew that love could ever feel like this.

the obligatory new year blog post

2010-01-01T22:35:00.003+08:00

Seriously, I am still grasping with the idea that its already a whole new different year.

I felt like 2009 just sorta passed by me. Like there's so much more that I could've done to make it a better year, but time ran out.

I did not achieve any of my resolutions that i made last year; I did not lose weight, I did not find any sports that I enjoyed doing, and I'm kinda lacking in the 'do more stuff' part as well. I find it funny, and only a tad bit disappointed. Resolutions senang camtu pun susah nak keep, kan? :P

So what happened last year?

I worked only until the first seven months at RedMoney, where I stayed for a total of a year and four months. The weekly deadline took its toll on me, and I find myself unable to offer them any more than what I already was. I plateaued at work. And it seemed so obviously unfair to the bosses who had high expectations of me. :/ Plus, I was a lousy business writer. And that fact is emphasized by the fact that I have not much interest to write about the banking and finance sector anyways.

So what did I do? I left the company, and joined my hubby handling his Subway shops. I have more time now. And admittedly, sometimes more than what I needed. I miss the hustle and bustle of having a 9 to 6 (sometimes 9 to whatever-time-we-finish-with-the-newsletter) job, but I love love love spending time with my Boo. And I definitely appreciate the free time I have... my pregnancy is not exactly a breeze, and there are a lot of days when I just couldn't get up on time to go to work.

Its one of the perks of working with your husband as your boss :)

Ah. And the pregnancy. We confirmed my pregnancy on Tuesday, 7th July. Our baby was detected at a very early stage of pregnancy... 4th week to be exact. It has been such a rollercoaster ride so far; emotionally and physically. But I remind myself to always be thankful for Allah's huge gift for me, even when I was puking my guts out in the bathroom :P

Less than 2 months and a half to go. 9 weeks to be exact. I remember having a conversation with one of my bestie Ikin, when she was telling me online that she had 9 weeks to go, and I thought, "9 weeks? It's still a long way for me to go." Dang it, it felt like yesterday!

And how could I forget, the US trip! It was one of the best 2 weeks of my life! I still wish for more time to be able to go to more places and do more things, but I'm being hopeful for another trip to the States, insya Allah. New York City and Washington DC was obviously the highlight of the trip. Atlantic City was kinda dead at that time of the year, so there was nothing to really shout about. Lyana is singing a different tune I'm sure; she's over in NJ/NY for new year's eve! *reeks with jealousy*

What else, what else. hmm. Tu je kot?

As for things that I look forward to this year - there are a few. Parenthood is obviously top of the list. People tell me that I will make a great mother, that my Sayang will be an awesome dad. To be honest, I don't know that yet. I don't think taking care of nephews and nieces would be sufficient practice (if at all) for parenthood... It's going to be a whole different ball game. I do believe, however, that we're going to do our very best. We have so much to learn, but with the many people we trust and love around to give us pointers, insya Allah it won't be a daunting task.

And if possible, I want to travel a little bit more. Yes, with a little one on tow. And when our boy is bigger, I hope to be able to decide as to whether I should go back to school, take up a short course on writing (I wonder if there's any available in Malaysia?), or get back into the working world. Makeup artistry class has to wait... I don't think I'll be able to come up with the money for it yet.

I hope to see my Babe win more medals in paintball tournaments. And... I want to lose a significant amount of kilos by the end of the year hehe. And ooh, to get my pavlova before my bun pops out of the oven! haha :D

Okay this post is long enough.

Happy 2010, people. Regardless of whether you make resolutions or not, I hope you'll achieve everything you hope for this year. But do remember that your family and loved ones are your pillar of strengths, so don't go breaking their hearts.

Old is gold.

2009-12-14T00:41:00.005+08:00

Watched the animated movie Up with my hubby tonight when we were at my dad's. I've heard that it was sad, but I didn't expect to cry buckets within the first 5 minutes of the movie.

For a few seconds I thought that it was my hormones overreacting, but even my babe said over and over again: 'This movie is sad!'

For the remainder of the movie and afterwards, I keep on thinking about the relationship between Carl and Ellie. Circumstances are different, but I pray and I hope that my Sayang and I will grow old together as loving and caring in our golden years, as we are right now. Even more so, Insya Allah.

Just like Carl and Ellie.

Amin.

almost like a miracle.

2009-11-27T22:42:00.003+08:00

Today, Friday 27th November 2009, on Aidiladha, I finally felt my baby's first kicks.

Not the fluttering kind that friends and baby books said I would feel initially (at my stage, its a bit too late for flutters), but these are real, solid bumps on my tummy. Three times, at least.

I was wondering when I would feel it. I wondered the most, I think, yesterday. It has already been 25 weeks, and by this time usually moms-to-be would already feel some kind of routine activities from the baby. Me? Not much. Close to nothing, in fact. Frankly speaking I was not too worried about the inactivities; I was anxious for it to begin.

But today was... wonderful. The first that I realized was in the morning when I just woke up, then at my Sayang's grandparents' place while I was lying down, and the last was when we were in the car on the way back from my dad's.

Hoping - and praying - for many more. :)

Alhamdullilah. It makes me even more thankful and in awe of Allah and His gift. :)

the tale of the three kittehs

2009-11-23T01:24:00.003+08:00

Alia has become some sort of an adoptive parent to three little kittens we found in a box outside our house on Saturday morning.

Now, the box was not left by some inconsiderate stranger who did not want to care for little kittens outside our gate. Instead, the box was actually moved from our house in Shah Alam from the old house in Cheras two days before. Initially we didn't know how that could've happen. One of our most popular assumption was that the mommy kitty has moved the kittens from its original birthing place due to a threat, and found our little box outside the kitchen door the best place to hide her babies.

But upon investigations (chewah!), we found out that the mommy kitty gave birth to the kittens at our old house in Cheras, and we've brought the kittens to our place in Shah Alam by accident. How did we come to that conclusion? Because we went to the old neighborhood today for a wedding, and found that one of the windows on the house's first floor was open, and there were cat's pawprints all over that area.

It is still an assumption, but its the only one that makes the most sense.

I can't imagine the stress the mommy is going through. She's probably frantic right now, searching for her little ones :(

But at the moment, we've decided to focus on the problem at hand: how to take care of these kittens. They're newborn, and their eyes are not yet opened, and feeding them started out as a bit of a challenge.

For my babe and I, there's a sense of dejavu in the whole situation. We were here before. About 2 years before our princess Zoey came into the picture, we took in three little kittens left abandoned at my college in Langat to our place, and we tried so hard to take care of them. But then one by one... they didn't survive :( So when the both of us found out about these new kittens, we were wary. But worried. We are still hoping. And in my case, I try very hard not to get attached to them. But at the same time... its so hard to keep a distance!

Anyway Alia persisted, and the maids are helping out a lot, and Alhamdullilah it seems like the kitties are responding well to Alia's brand of TLC. Well... at least two of them are. The third one is looking a little bit sicker and frailer than the other two. But no bad thoughts! Must stay positive :)

Hopefully, Insya Allah, we will get to nurse them to health. And keep them, love them, play with them.

Amin!

celebrate good times, come on!

2009-11-16T09:10:00.004+08:00

Hello all~

I had quite an eventful weekend. The family celebrated Kak Hani's belated birthday with dinner on Saturday at Madam Kwan's. It was a great night because of my awesome family... but the food was a letdown. It wasn't that bad, it's just... average.

On Sunday afternoon we went to Dina's kindergarten's year-end party/concert. She was absolutely adorable! She is also the top of her class among five-year olds, so we we're beaming! Like seriously beaming! Its amazing how the kindergarten teachers get the kids to behave during the concert... But of course, all hell broke loose when the concert ended and the buffet began.

And later that night a birthday dinner for my babe's brother, Fen (who shares Hani's birthdate!). Dinner was held at The Ship... Awesome sirloin steak! I was too full for dessert, but still managed to finish up Alia's vanilla ice-cream haha.

I thought it was a great weekend of celebration. The celebration of life, its progresses, and how we grow older (but not necessarily wiser!).

Talking about birthdays; Insya Allah if all goes well, today will mark the arrival of a very adorable and loved baby boy into the world! Congratulations in advance to Bad and Ikin! I pray for a safe labor and delivery for both mama and baby, Amin! Can't wait to see the three of you soon :)

And a moment of reflection:
Kak Hani said something to me and Kak Azfa in the car on our way back home from Dina's concert; that birthdays should be celebrated by celebrating the mothers that gave birth to us. I was struck by how obvious and simple that notion is, but somehow most of us -including me - fail to notice that. We shouldn't be asking our moms for birthday presents; we should be giving them flowers, chocolates, that bottle of perfume she's been eyeing, etc. Or visit her grave if she has passed on.

I'm not saying that we should do without partying for our birthdays from this moment onwards, but that we should include our mothers, one way or another, in it.

:)

time for change.

2009-11-15T10:09:00.005+08:00

GAAAHH! My blog layout is all crazy!

Will get it fixed by the end of day, insya Allah. In the meantime, sorry for the tomatoes!

------------

Oh yeay! Blog layout is fixed! Thank you Ikinnnnnnnn~ *muahsandhuggles*

updated 7:11pm

what would Freud say?

2009-10-25T11:43:00.002+08:00

I've been having weird dreams lately.

Two nights ago i dreamed that i was pregnant, which is not unusual since I am expecting (duh), but weird because I was 16 and in high school. The night before that a friend got angry at me after I gave the person's significant other an earful due to a disagreement, whereas a few weeks ago I dreamed that I was shot and killed. And that particular dream scared me living shit out of me. I've never had dreams like that before. I remember waking up immediately after I... uhmm... died.

I've had weird, creepy dreams before. Weirder than being pregnant and discussing my pregnancy during school assembly with my girlfriends. But I hate it now that the dreams come quite frequently, and though I don't give my dreams much thought, I really hope these dreams will be gone soon.

hello.

2009-10-15T18:42:00.002+08:00

Yeah I know. Its been ages! As to why, well... the same old reason lah. Nothing much to write about, so I didn't.

But today, something popped up. One of my bestie Lyana wrote a letter for my child, and I just have to share it.

Click here, and you'll see.

It made me cry. Not one of those boohoo tears everywhere kinda cry, but one where you were smiling one minute and suddenly OMG there's water in my eyes!

It made me so grateful that our baby - who might be a boy ;) - is so loved even when he is still in my womb by Lyana. And by other friends and family as well, and the realization made me want to cry even more.

I'm feeling like gold at the moment :)

But not so golden is the fact that my hubby's right ankle is hurting pretty bad since Sunday. Totally unrelated, I know... but it worries me. And do you know how frustrating it is to see someone you love moan in pain, and there's nothing you can do to make it better?

And oh, its kinda belated I know, but Syawal is a month-long celebration, so Salam Aidilfitri to all!

haha.

i like 'em simple and sweet.

2009-08-22T00:31:00.002+08:00

Ramadhan is here, everyone!

Selamat berpuasa!

I was hoping to be able to fast without missing any days, but judging from how I've been for the past few weeks, it may not be likely at least until the first trimester is over.

By the way, sorry that this blog has been lacking in new, relevant content as of late. I've only begun to feel more like myself in the past few days, but I still don't have much to blog about.

Later, ya'all.

oh my.

2009-07-31T11:18:00.002+08:00

There is not much happening in my life for me to blog about.

I'm not doing nothing. Just not much, I guess.

Being nauseous almost all the time makes me lazy. Which I usually fight off by trying to do things.

Which sometimes doesn't work.

Oh well. I'm off to my dad's for the weekend, while my husband will battle it out in a paintball tournament in Melaka.

Now lets finish packing.

better late than never.

2009-07-19T10:54:00.004+08:00

My last day at the office was eventful.

Kicked it off with lunch at Chinois KLCC with Ayu Aziz (who left the company on the same day as I did) and Ayu Musa (who left the company about a month before we both did). It was a good lunch - great food, awesome company. We mainly bitched and gossiped and talked and laughed... the usual ingredient for a girly lunch. :P

Ayu and I were fashionably late when arriving at the office at 3pm... haha. We then went out for tea with Shashi and Mr. Siva, which was kind of sad as it would be the last tea-break we would have together.

Went back to the office, finish up on clearing my stuff on the table as well as my PC, and then a lil get together with everyone for a proper farewell. Mr. Siva talked, then AM talked, got our going-away gift, and then for some reason they forgot that Ayu and I were supposed to be saying something as well. Which kinda worked to my advantage. I was feeling emotional.

Took loads of photos with almost everyone, before heading down to Stadium Negara for a farewell party. Which was actually just another reason to get drunk, smoke and laugh at the silliest thing.

They're sweet to smoke from a distance of me, so even when the wind blew towards me I didn't smell much of the cigarettes... except when most of them smoked at once. But still, its not something I'd like to go through again for the next 8 months or so.

A little mishap happened before the party animals moved their asses to Marketplace, which made everyone worry for about 15 minutes. Once the situation was under control, almost everyone was back to their jovial self, and then my Sayang picked me up from outside the club (and no, I did not step into Marketplace, just in case someone wonders why I would when I'm pregnant).

So thanks Mel for organizing the party, and much love to everyone who came. Admittedly, there's one person or two that I could do without, but hey, I'm not complaining.

I'm sorry that this blog post sounded so much like a narrative. I guess I want to remind myself of what happened... so that I don't forget :)

I'm honestly going to miss most of these people. And this may be hard to believe, but to an extent I am going to miss Thursday nights as well. Yeah the stress drove me away, but there's also the bond that we share.

OK emo mode is on.

jengjengjeng!

2009-07-12T17:52:00.002+08:00

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BABY! woohoo!

ok tak sempat nak buat post panjang-panjang. bai!

never have a tiny dot-like being made me feel so happy.

2009-07-07T20:17:00.005+08:00

Nak blog pasal apa eh?

Well, obviously I should be sharing my good news. That I am pregnant. Kusa and I are, insya Allah if things goes well, having a child. After so much angst on my on my 25th June post, I will be able to say to the naysayers to shut up.

Or maybe I shouldn't say anything to them. It is my pregnancy. I like to share, but I'm afraid it'll lead to more other angst-ridden post because someone said something that angers me.

Needless to say, I am ecstatic. Especially after the first check-up with my gynaecologist earlier today. Its not just a urine test thingy with a little positive sign. This is an actual, little dot that I can see.

I am scared of course; the first trimester is the most trying of the entire 9 months, they say. And the fact that our little dot is so very new... I'm taking extra precautions, even though the doctor said that 'life goes on as usual'.

And through it all, I'm glad I have my Babe with me. Alhamdullilah... for both the little dot and the man Ezham Hafiez ;)

Happy happy happy!

OK lets move on.

I am currently - or should I say hopefully - on my second last week at work. I say 'hopefully', since that the powers that be (my bosses I mean) have yet to find my replacement.

I really really want to leave by the 17th July. Mainly because that was the deadline I gave myself, after one of the bosses' assurance that they are 'looking at mid-July' as my final day. I'm afraid that if I am to stay longer, my already-lacklustre job performance would just go out of the window and commit suicide, rendering the company unhappy in the end that they might just kick me out anyways.

There are other reasons of course, but it wouldn't be nice of me to say anything.

Shower. That's what I'll do now.

why, facebook, why? why won't you load?!

2009-06-29T21:13:00.004+08:00

Thanks Jeeb for the meme I shall call...

Tag Bahasa Melayu yang mencabar minda~
haha.

TAG 1

Bekas kekasih saya adalah : seseorang yang tidak tahu erti persahabatan.
Saya sedang mendengar : Alia membebel kerana saya tidak larat untuk menonton DVD dengan dia.
Mungkin saya patut: tidur. Akan tetapi, saya perlu menunggu Azzura datang kerana saya perlu memulangkan buku-bukunya, dan mengambil DVD Grey's Anatomy.
Saya suka : makan, tidur, membeli belah, membaca (tidak semestinya di turutan yang diberikan)
Sahabat-sahabat baik saya : adalah mereka yang tahu keburukan saya, tetapi masih setia bersama saya. whee~
Saya tak paham : kenapa saya ketagihan Pet Society.
Saya kehilangan : masa yang boleh saya gunakan untuk bermain Pet Society.
Ramai yang berkata : yang muka saya tidak menyerupai arwah mama saya. Memang betul pun.
Makna nama saya : ialah Puteri dalam bahasa Arab.
Cinta itu adalah : suami saya, si bengot yang bernama Hafiez.
Di suatu tempat, seseorang sedang : membuat keputusan sama ada mahu berjumpa sahabatnya atau tidak untuk mengambil buku dan memberi DVD Grey's Anatomy musim yang keempat.
Saya akan cuba : untuk menjadi isteri yang lebih baik (huuu jiwang!)
Ayat SELAMANYA membawa maksud : forever di dalam bahasa Inggeris. Ia juga merupakan tajuk lagu dari kumpulan Innuendo. Saya suka lagu tu!
Telefon bimbit saya : berjenama Sony Ericsson.
Bila saya terjaga dari tidur : saya akan bangun dengan berat hati (dan badan) untuk mandi.
Saya paling meluat apabila : orang yang saya tidak suka bercakap tanpa henti dan menyangka saya ambil kisah dengan apa yang dikatakan olehnya.
Pesta/Parti adalah : sesuatu yang mahu saya adakan untuk harijadi suami saya Julai nanti.
Haiwan yang paling comel yang saya pernah temui ialah : kucing saya, Zoey.
Peringkat umur yang paling menyeronokkan bagi saya ialah : di sekolah menengah, di mana saya berjumpa dengan ramai sahabat baik saya.
Hari ini : sudah berakhir.
Malam ini saya akan : tidur, selepas berjumpa Azzura (dia sudah menghubungi saya dan akan tiba sebentar lagi!)
Esok pula saya akan : bekerja :(
Saya betul-betul inginkan : komputer riba milik saya sendiri.
Ketika anda lihat wajah anda di hadapan cermin pagi ini : saya dapati bahawa muka saya masih seperti biasa, Alhamdullilah.
Pusat membeli-belah atau arked permainan : Pusat membeli-belah. Arked permainan tidak ada menjual baju jenama Dorothy Perkins.
Makanan Barat atau Jepun : kedua-duanya sekali.
Bilik yang terang atau gelap: terpulang pada keadaan.
Makanan segera adalah : makanan yang cepat untuk disiapkan. Khasiatnya masih dipertikai.
Ayat terakhir yang anda katakan pada seseorang? Pandu kereta dengan hati-hati (tetapi di dalam bahasa Inggeris)

TAG2

Apakah perasaan anda sekarang? Bercampur-aduk di antara gembira, sedih, menyampah dan sebagainya.
Saya nak makan? Ketam, tapi tak tahu bila.
Saya tak suka? Orang yang suka mempersendakan orang lain, tapi tak dapat menerima apabila dirinya menjadi bahan lawak. Sengal kan?
Impian saya? Untuk mempunyai perniagaan sendiri, dan pada yang sama menjadi penulis cereka fiksyen yang sukses. haha.
Haiwan yang saya tak suka? Tikus!
Saya harapkan? Yang terbaik untuk saya dan suami, serta keluarga.
Jika boleh putarkan masa? Saya tidak mahu fikirkan kemungkinan itu, kerana saya tidak mahu merosakkan peluang saya untuk berjumpa suami saya.
Saya pada 10 tahun akan datang? Akan tetap dengan pendirian saya, insya Allah.
Handphone saya adalah sebuah? Sony Ericsson Z610i berwarna biru.
Saya pernah bercinta sebanyak? beberapa kali; dengan keluarga, teman-teman, lelaki yang tidak layak pun pernah juga.
Kawan-kawan saya? kebanyakannya sengal belaka.
Pernah dikhianati? Ya.
Apa yang hendak anda lakukan terhadap orang yang mengkhianati anda? hmm. Entah. Yang pasti, saya gembira kerana tiada pengkhianat di dalam hidup saya sekarang ini (Agaknya lah)
Siapa yang anda nak Tag? Kusa, Azzura (kalau dia masih ber'blog'), Lyana, Nik, Charles (haha!), Deepa, Arnie, Alia, Ikin, Saddiq dan sebagainya.

I can do better than this. But so malas to fix!

cranky.

2009-06-25T18:25:00.002+08:00

I feel lousy. Tired. Pissy.

Its Thursday, so in a way this is not out of the ordinary. But instead of the usual 'I'm-so-effed-off-I-want-to-strangle-someone' kinda pissy, it's more of a 'I-don't-wanna-be-here-I-want-to-just-lie-down-and-not-think' kinda pissy. It's weird. I don't usually have this.

Maybe is the lack of sleep - we came back from Cineleisure at 3am, and went to bed 15 minutes later.

It was a good outing though. Good movie too; I enjoyed it tremendously. But I don't know if I'll enjoy it as much if I was to watch it a second time. I did that for the first movie, and that 'whoa' feeling just wasn't there anymore. But I have a soft spot for Bumblebee and Optimus Prime. That always pull me back in.

Anyways.

You know what I hate? I know Soul covered this in her blog a while back, but its worth to be said again: people asking me if I am pregnant. Well okay, that I can actually handle. But for some messed up reason, when I tell them that I am not (in the calmest voice that my burning-with-hate throat would allow), most would just assume that I don't want to be pregnant. That I am 'planning' as to when I want to have a child.

How FUCKING insensitive is that? What if a woman is having difficulties conceiving because of hormonal or health problems? Don't you think that your sudden need to lecture her about how a child is God's gift would only make her sad?

I hate having to explain to people that I am not pregnant because rezeki belum ada. Every time I do it, it makes me feel like I owe them the explanation. And it adds to the stress. Which is ironic, because I'm supposed to be stress-free in order to have a better chance of getting pregnant, but all this accusations about the reason as to why I am not pregnant is stressing the hell out of me.

Well this is not helping my whole pissy, lousy feeling.

late nights, the blisskat way

2009-06-24T09:41:00.003+08:00

Went home around 1.30am last night to catch False Opus' reunion performance at urbanattic.

It was good. Their songs are great, and I especially love the two Malay songs.

Thanks baby for the great date ;)

And another late night tonight. We're catching Transformers' 11.45pm show at Cineleisure along with my Sayang's friends. Bad move to agree to the movie actually; tomorrow is Thursday, after all.

I'm so going to have a hard time waking up tomorrow morning. Wish me luck.

apologies.

2009-06-14T10:52:00.002+08:00

Sorry guys. I did something stupid that caused the blog to be placed on private for a few days.

Its back on now... So jangan marah okay?

A lot of things are happening nowadays; with family, work, my hubby. Things are hectic. I welcome some of the chaos, some... not as much. Oh well, such is life.

I'm looking forward to the day I join Subway. As of this moment, I'm unsure yet when my final day at the office will be, but we're planning for a trip in mid July so Insya Allah before then. So by August, I should be able to complain a lot less about the little time I have to do anything. haha.

In the midst of it all, a way of keeping my sanity intact, I've been reading. I re-read To Kill A Mockingbird, which is one of the most awesome book ever. There's not a lot of books out there that tells a story from a nine-year old's point of view, that reveals so much about life and humanity. The book is a classic, and rightfully so.

And I'm reading the Twilight saga back-to-back. I'm only starting in my third book today, and by the looks of it I should be able to finish the final and fourth book by the weekend. The story is pretty good, considering the fact that it is targeted at a mostly young adult audience (ie 18 year olds). I'm a sucker for love stories with a twist, and for brooding vampires.

Okay, admittedly I began reading the books after watching the movie. But not because the movie was good... it's because the movie lacks something, and I need to know what it was. I was right; for instance, there's so much more to the main character Bella in the first book than there was in the movie. And it depicts the vampires with much more depth.

And of course, there was Robert Pattinson. I feel silly right now, crushing on him like I did with Leonardo DiCaprio when I was a teenager (before Titanic, mind you). But not as bad lah. And its not just Robert Pattinson... Its Robert Pattinson as Edward Cullen. Gila drool sial. If there are vampires in the world, I bet Robert Pattinson is the head of the Volturi.

And so, this post ends.

Job opening!

2009-06-09T10:30:00.004+08:00

The company I am working for is looking for a writer for our weekly publication, Islamic Finance news.

If you're interested or know someone who might be, please email mirafreaka at yahoo dot com for more information.

And people, please, NO SPAM. Only genuine interest will be entertained.

By the way, that person will be taking over my job.

:)

2009-05-30T11:31:00.006+08:00

Pictures are uploaded on Facebook, but here's a preview:

Broadway, baby :)

Saying hello to Lincoln

Feeding my seafood addiction

Photos from the US trip will be up soon! I promise!

2009-05-29T17:05:00.002+08:00

But in the mean time...

It's time for Friday Fill-ins! (yes, I know the idea is to do it every Friday, but excuse me for not having the time! :P)

1. It's cold and that's no big surprise, considering the fact that the office is actually a freezer in disguise.

2. I have a thing for sun-dried tomatoes.

3. My favorite health and beauty product is a daily dose of Vitamin C.

4. Oh how I wish the tiring flight to the States, and the trip back to Malaysia, was a nice long ride.

5. Well, first of all my inability to be mean may make me seem timid, but mind you, hell has no fury like a woman scorned.

6. The Lincoln Memorial, Broadway and Atlantic City; those were the cast of characters in a recent dream and it was actually not a dream, but seemed like it coz I never thought I'd be going to those places in a million years.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to dinner with my Sayang and Lyana, tomorrow my plans include watching my Hubby get shot with balls of paint and Sunday, I want to hug Ikin till she can't breathe (but I will try and spare her little dango)!

to the end.

2009-05-22T05:46:00.002+08:00

Hello all~

Just so you know, 5 hours is not enough time to spend in New York.

Yup, went to the Big Apple on the fourth day of our trip. Managed to only walk around in Times Square, Broadway and the Rockafeller Center, before heading back to Penn Station. I wanted to go to Central Park and the Empire State Building as well (along with countless others landmark places in NY), but 5 hours was all we had.

If I had the money and time to spare, I would love to spend at least four days there. But its okay. I still had the time of my life.

Later that day, we went to pick up Mommy's sis, Ucu, who lives in California from the airport. She came with us (and kindly drove!) to Washington DC for a night's stay. It was a long drive... about 5 hours and 30 minutes, me thinks.

And what do you know... the same thing happened. There was just not enough time. We did go to the White House and the Washington, Lincoln, World War II and Korean War monuments, but only got to see Jefferson's from afar, as well as Capitol Hill. Walked around the Smithsonians for a bit as well, and we only managed to get inside the American History Museum to get some souvenirs.

Anyways, we were supposed to go to Niagara Falls on Wednesday, but I think everyone was still tired from the DC trip that we decided against it. So we went to a little town called Shamong in New Jersey instead to get my Baby's paintball gears, which was about an hour's drive away. And on a (almost) whim, we went to Atlantic City.

The place was okay, I guess. I might sing a different tune if I had money to burn. And there's a lot of elderly people there... I wonder why?

I like the seaside and the beach though. It was beautiful. And cold.

And today, we went and did some last minute shopping at Costco and Target. The little money I had left from previous shopping trips and souvenirs hunting prevented me from spending too much, thus keeping my sanity intact.

2 more days. Ucu will be leaving tomorrow evening, and our flight is not until Saturday night. I'm dreading the 22-hour journey, but I do miss my family, my cat, the weather (when its sunny and warm), the feeling of being at home.

By the way, sorry for the lack of pictures. Will try to do something about that when I get back.

the graduate.

2009-05-16T12:44:00.002+08:00

Alhamdullilah, Fen's graduation went well.

It was a very intimate dinner. Everyone knew each other, and the faculty members were very nice. There were several highlights, but the fact that bro-in-law graduated is the best of all. Mommy was beaming with absolute pride... you can see it from a thousand miles away.

And to watch my hubby went on fanboy mode at the sight of Adam and Andy Kubert is another memorable moment as well~

Now I sleep.

The beginning

2009-05-15T07:35:00.002+08:00

Hello everyone!

If you think that I am extra cheery today, that's because I am. No... not because I am in the US, but because I finally got off a 21 hour flight and I got to sleep on a proper, comfy bed!

Anyways, I arrived safely (with a little turbulence on the way to Newark) at 1oam. Got to the hotel about 2 hours later, and slept to wake up at 7pm! hahahahah~

The weather is gloomy when we arrived.

Ok nak gi makan. Lapar.

Thank God It's Friday

2009-05-08T13:02:00.003+08:00

1. Apples are to oranges as cheesecakes are to petai.

2. Assume makes an ass out of u and me and that's all I have to say about that.

3. I think I hear voices.

4. I don't need a flag.

5. Do what you want to do, but hell, leave me out of it.

6. Across the road, there stood a mime and behind him was a Radio Flyer wagon; in the wagon was a bucket filled with fish.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to watch a movie with my Babe, tomorrow my plans include wishing Najeeb a happy birthday and a doa selamat for my hubby's cousin, and Sunday, I want to start packing for my US trip!

Too random for you? Check out Friday Fill-Ins.

The Three

2009-05-08T02:24:00.003+08:00

Note to Najeeb: I'll do the memes you tagged me once I have more time k?

Three Names I go by
1. Elmira
2. El
3. Mira

Three Jobs I have had in my life
1. Body Shop's product advisor
2. Admin Asst at UPM's graduate school
3. Writer

Three Places I have lived
1. Serdang
2. Bandar Tun Razak
3. Shah Alam

Three TV Shows that I watch [well, let's make it Three TV Shows that I would watch if time permits!]
1. Project Runway
2. Greys Anatomy
3. Pushing Daisies

Three Favorite Places I have been
1. Bali, Indonesia
2. Langkawi, Malaysia la duh
3. Kedai buku

People that e-mail me regularly
1. My bosses
2. Colleagues
3. Facebook haha.

Three of my favorite foods
1. Fish
2. Chocolate
3. Crab and Prawn

Three things I would like to do
1. Cook more
2. Watch TV
3. Bring peace to the world with a flick of my fingers

Things I am looking forward to
1. US trip. Wednesday, come soon!
2. July.
3. Make babies haha

Three people that would respond to this and do it
1. Nana
2. My babes
3. Najeeb + Soul
(Okay more than three but what the hell.)

----

A lot of these answers reminds me of what little time I have to do the little things, like spending time in a bookstore, or watch TV. Simple pleasures in life that we take for granted.

I'm sleepy. And yet I'm blogging, and I'm on Facebook. Hubby is probably snoring away in the room. hmm. Time to join him, I guess.

oh my.

2009-04-23T21:13:00.005+08:00

I wish the one of the embassy interviewer would read my loathe post.

So what if a guy has never stepped outside of Malaysia? Not everyone has the privilege, the money to spend, the time to spare. I should know.

And how is he 'went straight hitting for the gold' just because his first time on an airplane is to go to the States? He was going to visit his girlfriend, for heaven's sake. Its not like he just woke up one day, decided to go to the US, because the country is so irresistible that he just have to 'hit for the gold'!

I know for sure that not all Americans working in the embassy are like that. My interviewer, for one thing, was one of the nicest man in a government office I've ever met. He didn't feel the necessity to drag my interview down and ask unnecessary questions, request to see trivial documents. He just went straight to the point.

But this other guy... such arrogance! I could not help but roll my eyes when he said what he said.

But maybe he was just having a bad day. Maybe he did not do that intentionally... you know, presenting himself as someone who is too proud of being American and thinks that everyone else in this whole wide world dreams and sighs dreamily of the US. Plus, the interviewee did not really help the situation either. Taking up a loan to visit his girlfriend? Are you kidding me?!

*deep breaths*

Anyways, my interview went extremely well. The waiting part took most of time; otherwise the interview itself took roughly five minutes. It helped that Mommy and Hubby got their visas three years ago, and that I am already working, and we've made firm plans for our May trip. So Alhamdullilah, it was easy breezy.

And I'm really looking forward to the trip. 12 days off work, 12 days with my Sayang. And his mom, his brother and Insya Allah his aunt, but it all adds up to the fun. And it has been a long while since I traveled anywhere, the last one being Bali in 2006, so I'm definitely making the most of my holiday.

Three more weeks. whee~!

61

2009-04-14T15:58:00.002+08:00

That's how old my late mother would be today if she is still alive.

Happy Birthday, Mama.

loathe.

2009-04-09T19:15:00.003+08:00

With all my might, I hate those who are:

Ignorant: These kind of people, I meet, either in real life or virtually, every day. Mostly online, though. For instance: You guys know that I work in an Islamic finance publication, right? So sometimes, the news that I get through my Google Alerts are on Islam but not necessarily on finance. More often than I would've liked, I receive alerts on blog posts that people all over the world put up, dissing Islam up to the brim, like they know so much about the religion to be talking about it in the first place.

What the hell is up with that?! I mean, regardless of the subject matter, you should only speak up when you know what you are talking about. You don't have to be an expert on it, but at least make educated opinions statements. I know I'm no expert in Islam although I am Muslim, that's why I usually steer away from making religiously-driven postings. But you, the only Muslim you know is Osama bin Laden, and suddenly you know everything? bleurgh!

Arrogant: Why do you talk and type like you are the best human being in the world? As if the rest of humanity is beneath you, and none of our opinions matter? You refuse to accept when someone refutes your brick-hard stand on an issue, even when you probably know the other party is right.

It irks me when people use sarcasm to belittle others. Its funny when it is, but when its not... God help me. Don't your parents ever tell you not to look down on other people? Its rude!

Judgmental: Different people have different ways at living their life, at looking at their life. People have different goals and expectations, dreams and fears, wants and needs. So why do you, pray tell, scoff at those who feel and think differently than you?

So what if the newly-married couple is staying at their in-laws? Does it hurt you in any way? And what is it to you if they don't want to have any children yet due to financial reasons? Are you willing to offer them your savings to help them? Just because your family taught you that the females does not belong in the office, and that the men are not suppose to be in the kitchen EVER, that doesn't mean that the complete opposite won't work for other people!

Unless you know these people personally that you may be in a better position to comment on their life (to them in person, not via blogs, twitter, facebook, surat layang), reserve your opinion to yourself. Drop that holier-than-thou attitude la please. It annoys others, and it won't do you much good in the long run.

---

Excuse me. I'm ranting. I just don't get these people sometimes.

And mind you, these are only some of the types of personality I hate.

red flats is <3

2009-03-27T18:53:00.003+08:00

It's very very hard to concentrate when you're hungry. *pats tummy*

... See? I don't even remember the next line I wanted to type out after the first one above, and I was just thinking about it like a minute ago!

Anyways, got a new pair of flats that a colleague ordered for me from Indonesia. Yup, I occasionally shop online. Well, I only buy from the Indonesian shoe shop and a local plus-size online boutique. Tried both shops just for the heck of it, and I'm glad the good turned out great.

But no, that does not mean that I'll start shopping online religiously. There's something about going to a store, trying things out for myself, imagining what occasions you can wear the top/dress/pants/shoes to, and then only taking out my wallet to pay for the item.

Wah and suddenly my concentration level risen up.

Hidayah... aku laparrrr!

trippin' on smoothie

2009-03-20T12:33:00.003+08:00

Still no Internet at home.

Been a while since I was able to log on to Facebook, to find that the look has changed. And MSN Messenger too!

Have yet to really explore it to decide whether I love it or loathe it. I will soon, I hope.

till later~

The first one live from Shah Alam

2009-03-08T01:47:00.004+08:00

I am now getting online from a mamak in Seksyen 11, Shah Alam, which I think is kind of like a formal officiation of our residency in the city.

Didn't really get the chance to tell everyone, but we've moved in my in-laws' new house since Tuesday. The house is very much ready, but there are boxes still left unpacked in our bedrooms. No real rush to unpack everything as yet I suppose, as my Sayang and I haven't bought our bookshelf yet, and we still need a coffee table.

But Alhamdullilah, our bedroom is bigger now, and no more single bed yeay!

We still don't have a telephone line or Astro though, which is why I'm here at the mamak. Kusa wants to watch the Man U - Fulham game, and I need my Facebook fix. And YM. And I want to blog.

Moving on.

My hubby and I went to see Jason Mraz on Wednesday with Zura and her friend Akmar, Hadi and Lyana, and we HAD A BLAST! Seriously, I regretted not getting the standing tickets... I want the Polaroid pic he took of himself!

And Mraz sounds so much better live, and he looked so damn awesome, to the extent that I think Hadi has a crush on him! haha~ But I'm glad that I went with some of my greatest friends... you guys are the bomb! <3

Hmm so what else?

ooooh. I've been making more effort to read lately, and I'm reading my second book in a week now. Its chick-lit, Falling Out of Fashin by Karen Yampolsky, not something that I usually read. But Zura is right; it does make a good read after a long day of work, when you want something easy to read. I Googled the book online, and apparently it was inspired by real life events. Go look it up, if you are interested :)

I have 4 more book in my collection that I've yet to read, but already I am planning to buy more hahahaha.

On the downside, I got a scare earlier today when my sister told me that my dad is having difficulty to move around because of a sudden pain at the waist area. Got really worried, so Kusa and I rushed to Serdang. He's not feeling any much better even after a reflexology treatment, but at least he can joke around. So we're glad. If things doesn't get any better tomorrow, we're planning to take him to the hospital. Do pray for him yea?

Anyways, The Matta Travel Fair is on next weekend, and I'm planning to go scout for cheap deals for our anniversary in July. We're aiming for something local, and probably somewhere by the beach. Any suggestions?

So how's this as a first post from our new neighborhood?

I was tagged part deux

2009-02-28T11:58:00.003+08:00

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
I don't think so.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
Yesterday. Seven Pounds made me cry like a little girl.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
haha no!

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAL?
Good food. haha. It depends, really.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Yes. Her name is Zoe. She's fat, and she's gray. And yes, she's a cat.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Yup! I'd probably tell me to get serious about losing weight tho.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
No lah I use soap.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
haha not really, no.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Honey gold and Quakers' wheat squares thingy.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
I don't wear shoes with strings in the first place.

12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
At the moment, its chocolate and mint.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Their eyes.

15. RED OR PINK?
Red ftw!

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORlTE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
My lack of will to get on the treadmill.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
Mama.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
Its up to them really.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
No shoes, pink and white stripey pants. Yes I'm in my pajamas.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The Brilliant Green - Angel Song

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE
Red la duh.

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Estee Lauder's Pleasures and Pure White Linen Breeze, Annick Goutal's Petite Cherie, fresh lilies. And any rose scents, either fresh or perfume; reminds me of my mother and The Body Shop's Tea Rose perfume she used to wear.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Kak Fara, last night.

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Several people tagged me, and I like them all very much! <3

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
Football when with hubby, and paintball when hubby is playing.

27. HAIR COLOR?
Dark brown.

28. EYE COLOR?
Dark brown.

DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No. I don't have to :D

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Malay, Chinese, Indian, Italian, Japanese, Mexican. I love food la basically. But am currently craving for Las Carretas' jalapeno poppers.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Happy endings! I'm a sucker like that.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Seven Pounds with Azzura :)

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Salmon haha.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Both!

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs AND kisses.

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND to this note?
The people of Sup Cendawan Anjung.

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND to this note?
uhm. My husband.

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Khaled Hosseini's A Thousand Splendid Suns.

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Mouse la duh.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
Bourne Ultimatum.

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S).
Kusa's snore (when its gentle and not too loud that I can't sleep)

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Both?

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Europe baby!

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I can move my ears :)

46 WHERE WERE U BORN?
KL.

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
Everyone's!

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
IRC. Yup it started out as an internet relationship. Yanti introduced us. Thanks Yanti! (Or is it "Dang it, Yanti, look what you got me into!" ;) hahaha. Just kidding!)

I was tagged

2009-02-27T09:20:00.002+08:00

Rules: It's harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag twenty people.

Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real, nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.

1. What is your name : Mira

2. A four Letter Word : More

3. A boy's Name : Michael

4. A girl's Name : Marissa

5. An occupation : Marskman

6. A colour : Maroon

7. Something you'll wear : Maxi skirt

9. A food : Mee Maggi

10. Something found in the bathroom: Mirror

11. A place : Museum

12. A reason for being late: Makan! haha.

13. Something you'd shout : Mangkuk ayun! (a tribute to Najeeb :P)

14. A movie title : Memoirs of a Geisha

15. Something you drink : Milkshake

16. A musical group : My Chemical Romance

17. An animal : Mink

18. A street name : Maharajalela, Jalan

19. A type of car : Mitsubishi

20. The title of a song : Mary had a Little Lamb haha.

V Day shortie.

2009-02-15T00:53:00.002+08:00

I want to write, but am too tired.

Noran's nikah was on Friday, and she had her reception yesterday. was beautiful, and as weddings usually are, extremely chaotic.

But I love her. And we had a blast.

Dina's birthday was on Friday as well. After Noran's wedding, the Syed Nor Azlan clan had a birthday celebration for her.

Adorable cupcakes and little cream puffs are yum~

Feet is killing me.

Will write more on both events when I have the chance.

Toodles~

I'm supposed to be resting.

2009-02-06T17:33:00.004+08:00

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I am from the Jamalullail clan of the Syed lineage. My second name, Elmira, when combined with the clan name, means 'princess of the beautiful night'.

2. Also on my name, I used to carry two ICs around before MyKad was introduced. One is the regular one with only my name, the other one with my full name [inclusive of my dad's name]. In case you're wondering, its Syarifah Elmira Afzan binti Syed Nor Azlan. A mouthful, eh? haha. I love my name!

3. I love love love spicy food. Although I have to take em with jugs full of water.

4. I had this weird thing that kinda stopped, where whatever cookies, candies of chocolate pieces I eat must be in even numbers. It only applied to countable food items like the ones I mention... not rice or noodles.

5. I studied Performing Arts in a UiTM for a year. Was the pioneering batch. Something screwed up, and then I didn't pursue it. Oh well.

6. Chocolate and lemon tastes weird together. But separately, they're heaven-sent.

7. My babe and I couldn't pinpoint an exact date when we got together. We didn't exactly do the whole "Will you be my girl/boy?" routine. We just decided one day - over the net, nonetheless - to go with the flow. The flow is still going.

8. Made some very close friends online, in IRC, in a little channel called #backroomkl. But most of them moved on to other things. One I married to. And one girl I'm still close to is in Japan.

9. Also on friends, some of my best friends are the ones from school. This either shows that I don't socialize much, or that I am very loyal that way.

10. I can't get angry for too long. Especially with friends and my sisters. So even when a friend screws up and then comes back, I'd accept her/him back without much questions.

11. I am currently swooning over a French toddler that goes by the name Capucine.

12. My late mother is my ultimate hero. She is wise, patient, calm, non-judgmental, and would even help those who dissed her in the past. I don't think I can be like her.

13. I'm not very funny. [Unlike Hadi, I am dead serious!]

14. I aspire to own a makeup artistry business by the time I'm 33.

15. I want to write a fiction novel. No deadline for that yet, though.

16. I wanted to be a radio DJ. I swear to God, I put that down in school whenever they ask students to write down our ambitions.

17. My husband is the only person who can get away with tickling me. He suffers in the process though. I am very ticklish, up to a point where I loathed being tickled at. I may laugh when I am tickled, but I cry inside. And sometimes, afterward. But Kusa is persistent. Its good though... its not like I want him to stop.

18. Alanis Morissette's Jagged Little Pill and No Doubt's Tragic Kingdom are the best albums of all time, in my list.

19. I forgive, but forgetting is harder. I won't say that I don't, but can't say that I do either. It depends. So save the trouble and don't mess with me k?

20. I am surrounded with graphically creative people: my husband, his brother, his best friend, my best friend. But I am not.

21. I have sensitive teeth due to the stupidity of a dentist.

22. I fidget. Its a habit that's hard to break.

23. I hate the kind of cherries that people put on a cake. But give me real ones anytime, baby. yum!

24. I am the tallest among my siblings. And I'm the youngest.

25. I am amazed how my Sayang can make me get over my sulking mode with just a single look or one line to make me laugh again. I may still be angry, but I laugh anyways. And on how he finds different ways to annoy me on a daily basis. Every day. Even after 7 years and six months. He is so annoying, its endearing. :)

By the way, I'm tagging EVERYONE.

woohoo! i'm blogging for the second day in a row!

2009-01-30T18:25:00.004+08:00

Two friends of mine and myself had a discussion during lunch about tudung-clad women and smoking.

It was brought up when one of them, Hidayah, saw a girl with tudung or headscarf smoke a cigarette at the mamak where we were having lunch, near the office. She was voicing out her disbelief to us, and said that she couldn't accept it. Juliana, the other girl, agreed.

I did not.

In a nutshell, their point of view was - putting religion and health reasons aside - that its not appropriate for women who are supposed to be the epitome of prim and proper [as most tudung-clad women are] to smoke in public.

While mine - of course, putting religion and health reasons aside - is that it should be okay for them to smoke, just as it is okay for men, or women not wearing tudung. Why should there be a double standard?

This no smoking rule for tudung-wearer, it seems to me, was imposed by society.

I'm not the smartest of person to be giving out expert opinions; my thoughts are mine, from what I observed and from what I have learned. I was not brought-up to believe that those wearing the headscarf should be held in a different pedestal than those who are not (except for the obvious fact that wearing the tudung is a must amongst Muslim women).

To me, I have a bigger problem with tudung-wearer who wears short-sleeved, tight fitting t-shirts. Kinda defeats the whole purpose, don't you think?

Being prim and proper or respectable to me its about how a woman, regardless of whether her hair shows or not, carries herself. The same how you would judge a man. Doesn't help that there already is an existing double standards between man and women, and now there's one between those donning the tudung or not pulak?

And hearing out their opinion, I do understand what they were trying to say. Juliana said that women and sometimes men in Korea smoked discreetly, because they were taught that it is not proper to do it in public.

But again my question: whose fault was that?

Talking to them about it did not change my mind. In the end, we just agreed to disagree.

What do you think?

28 at 4.10pm

2009-01-30T01:19:00.004+08:00

And so another 29th January has passed us by.

More significantly to me lah, of course, with my 28th birthday and all that.

Yeah. I'm 28 now. I thought the number would scare me, but its kind of liberating instead. I believe I am wiser now. Still so much to learn, and so many things I have yet to accomplish, but Insya Allah I'll get there.

Random thought: I wonder how true the saying that a true lady doesn't tell her age?

Anyways. I hope I didn't annoy too much with my birthday countdowns and what-not. I love celebrating my birthday, and I'm not ashamed to admit that. I love the fact that its in January, and that I can tell people "My birthday is on the 29th day of the year". So to those who are annoyed, I am sorry. Not like I'm going to stop doing it, but sorry anyways.

I had a pretty decent day. OK that's a lie. I was stressed, especially in the evening. Didn't help that today is a effing Thursday.

I'm actually considering imposing a 'no work on a birthday' policy on myself. and hubby baby. boleh tak?

Thank you everyone for the kind wishes (and the occasional get-baby-soon messages that somehow got tangled up in the birthday messages). I truly, honestly feel very appreciated and loved. :)

And so the birthday weekend begins. I have 4 celebrations roughly planned out, so here's to another busy weekend!

I owe it to you people

2009-01-25T23:42:00.005+08:00

OK lah, since a few people have been telling me that my previous blog title was misleading (not exactly in those words, though), here's a post on the band that I've been head-over-heels about.

Well, to be honest, there's not much to blog about. I didn't know Estrella existed until yesterday, when I was channel-surfing and suddenly decided to stop at hitz.tv. What caught me was this cute girl singing the lead (Liyana, I think her name is) and that the beginning of the song, titled 'Stay', sounds so much like 'Dan' by Sheila on 7, my ultimate Indonesian band.

The song is catchy, and fun. So I decided to look them up on YouTube. And I found this.

The title of this song is 'Ternyata'. I fell in love with it almost immediately. I love it so much, I even told Najeeb that he has to have the song during his reception!

So yeah. This is why I was swooning over them.

swooning over Estrella

2009-01-24T13:23:00.004+08:00

Hello everyone. Yes, I am blogging without waiting for someone to tell me to! woohoo!

Met up with Noran and Along this morning for breakfast/wedding briefing session. Didn't get to lepak too long as noran had to rush to Penang at noon. But it was nice, and meeting with Along after so effing long is great.

Remember Long... Ko tu yang kurus sangat, bukan aku yang gemuk, ok? hahaha.

Anyways, talking about weddings and the preparations makes me think about mine six months ago. Noran has hers pretty much covered, and by the looks of it, definitely better prepared that I was. There are some little details here and there that she overlooked, but to me, that happens to the best of us. So no need to worry babe, you'll be fine :)

But it is hard work. And some may even seem tedious and petty to those not directly involved in the wedding, or have never worked on one ever. Some people have it lucky; they can have anything they want however they want it to be without people telling them what to do. Some, like me, fight to have what they want. And sadly there are those whose weddings are controlled by so-called concerned aunties and uncles and grandma and grandpa and grandmom's step sister from her father's third marriage. No offense.

For those who might be interested, there are two things that I consider most important in planning a wedding: communication, and compromise. And these two were essential in making my wedding perfect, for me, my husband and I think for my family as well.

Communication is pretty much self-explanatory; you gotta let your thoughts be known for people to know what you want. And, you gotta listen to other people as well when they are voicing out their opinion. Especially if they have been planning weddings before. Some ideas may be kolot to you, but you gotta hear them out before making judgments.

Compromise is something that my dad and I only came to after months of crying and shouting. Contrary to popular belief, a wedding is not just about you and your husband/wife. That's just bullshit. Okay maybe not completely, but its half bullshit.

Of course, the couple is where the spotlight should be on, but remember that a wedding reception, especially a Malay one, is a family celebration. A father celebrates his happiness that his daughter has found the perfect match, a mother cries as her son is starting a new family. Or a sister rejoicing over the fact that she doesn't have to share the room or fight over the remote anymore. The wedding is not just your day; the wedding is about family.

I think I strayed a little.

Getting back on track. It can't be helped that opinions between the bride/groom and the parents, for instance, may differ about how the wedding should be planned. Arguments can just rise up out of thin air, for no apparent reason. It could be about the dais or pelamin, the goodie bag, the attire, the decorations at the house, some may even fight over something as seemingly trivial as the theme color! So the ability to compromise is gold at times like these. Ideally, both sides should be willing to. Parents have to remember that it is the son or daughter that is getting married, while the other party needs to remember that parents are celebrating a joyous occasion and want things to be perfect.

And if all else fails, follow this rule: whoever pays for it, gets to decide. The other party, deal with it.

Okay so that's not really a good advice. So use it only under EXTREMELY EXTREME situations.

There were hell when I planned for my wedding. There were things that I wasn't too pleased about. But I can say this with conviction: in the end, it does not matter. You may be a little grumpy that you did not get that RM700 three-tier wedding cake that you wanted, but I bet you me that you're not gonna sulk on your wedding day about it. You wouldn't want to.

And no, I didn't want a RM700 three-tier wedding cake.

Compromise is also important with yourself. If you're under a budget, don't fret too much over the fact that you can't afford that celebrity make-up artist, or that divine french lace for your baju nikah. Make the most of what you can have.

On the wedding day, remember not to sweat the little things. Some things may be a little bigger than small, so ask someone to look on it for you. But if they can't, or its not really a big deal, then live with it and enjoy your day.

By the way, please please please bear in mind that weddings last for a mere few days, but marriage is, insya Allah, forever. So whatever it is, keep your priorities straight, yeah?

And that's how I got my perfect wedding.

the first in '09

2009-01-17T20:11:00.003+08:00

It seems like not blogging for long periods of time has become a habit of mine. It's not because that I don't have any time at all to spend in front of the pc, typing away; I just don't have enough of it. I'm not the kind of person who would get online for the sake of blogging, hence I only update the blog only when I am truly free, and I don't have much to do, online or off.

Getting back on the time factor... its just insane. Like I said, not to the point that I don't have time for anything, but it takes a lot of in-advance planning just to have dinner or lunch with my babes, for instant. Its been a long while since my Sayang and I ever went on a proper date, and besides KLCC, I haven't been to malls for the longest time.

This is not acceptable when, Insya Allah, a baby comes our way.

Hopefully, things will improve once we move permanently to Shah Alam [and no, its not our own house but the in-laws']. And come April, once the finance class is over and done with, we'll have two extra evenings during the weekdays to play with. Maybe then I'll have time to do things I want to do, and to do things I know my Babe wants me to do more of...

It'll come through, I hope.

It will be the 18th day of January in a few moments. I've been meaning to do sort of like a lowdown of the significant happenings in 2008 to me and my Sayang. I haven't had the chance, and Ikin kind of did it a lil bit late into the month as well, so why the hell not?

A lot of things happened this year. On the very bright side, I am now a wife. I am surprised at how much being married does not shock me; I was prepared to go through some serious changes. But so far there has not been much difference in how I conduct my daily life. Except for the fact I see a lot more of my Boo. I guess it has a lot to do with how I am not able to do a lot of 'wifely' stuff. Insya Allah, when we get our own place, I will.

I also got a my first stable, real paying job this year. And roughly 9 months later, I got promoted. Its a big deal to me... I wasn't expecting any increament or promotion until at least a full one year. It means more work, of course, but at the same time more trust from my bosses. So yeay! And an achievement of mine that is work-related is.... that I made several reports on Islamic finance without any financial background whatsoever. haha. Not recommended, though.

Other highlights include our Langkawi and Penang trips, as well as the arrival of Fadlan Ilham.

The lows? I left a job in March 2008 which I kind of had high hopes for. On the outside, it sounded like the perfect job for me. I got to write, and I got to learn so much. But I was late to realize that some things did not feel right: there was no confirmation letter after my internship ended, my pay was in cash with no documentation, I had to do a job meant for two people, and the editor of the magazine has no experience in editorial. Publishing is NOT editorial! blergh.

Also, someone close to me was - and still is - suffering some complications due to an ailment the person had two years ago. It does not seem to get better, but am hoping for the best this year.

Can't seem to think of anything else to add to this list. But all-in-all, it has been a wonderful year for me, and was quite stressful for the first half mostly due to work and wedding preparations. The second half fared better, but the stress didn't exactly lessen. Such is life.

As for my resolutions, well, it has never really been my thing. But I tought, what the heck?, so this year, I resolve to:

Be fitter, and lose some weight in the process. Yes I know I say this often.
Find a sport that I enjoy doing.
Do more - bake, cook, write, theatre, movies, etc.

I'd add more to the list, but I'd like to keep this realistic.

So now I am off to bed.

And oh, by the way, its my birthday in roughly 11 days. ;)

mira, the red-nosed kat.

2008-12-28T20:55:00.005+08:00

I usually get the sniffles when most people are already recovering from the flu. I guess you can say that I'm a late bloomer during the season. Someone else always get sick first in the household, and I'd get it from that person.

But not this time around. The first day I honestly thought that it was just my sinus, something I get on and off, usually when there's a drastic change in the weather [from sunny to rainy in a matter of minutes, or staying in with the air conditioning on and go out under the hot sun the next very second]. But then the next day the runny nose didn't go away, plus I got myself a bonus - a damn annoying sore throat. That's pretty much the deal breaker for me; I knew I'll be attaching myself to a box of tissue for the next few days.

... Did I just type out two lengthy paragraphs on flu? blergh.

OK so let's focus on something more cheery. Like the Bukit Merah trip I took! woohoo! Honestly, the 'open mind, open heart' mantra I held on to like my life depended on it [yes I'm exaggerating] worked like a charm. It was actually a very decent trip.

We arrived on Christmas day at around 3pm, and had one of the lousiest laksa ever, at a supposed kopitiam near the apartment where we were staying. I say supposed coz it looked more like food court than a kopitiam. Waited for the rest of my family to arrive, settled down for a bit, and off we go to visit my auntie and her family at a small town nearby, in Bagan Serai.

The next day was tiring! Went to the Orang Utan Island in the morning, and that was actually... fun. Especially since that was the first time ever I saw orang utans! Went to the Ecopark next, and I had fun there as well, surprisingly. Of course, there's nothing to shout about really... it's just a zoo with many trails to follow, and an animal show every 30 minutes [which was entertaining!]. And I had a good walk as well. Walking back to the main area, which was about 15 minutes from the Ecopark, was an even better exercise as I was carrying Fadlan in my arms. Penat k? Whoever invented the baby stroller is a genius. But Lalan [as we sometimes call him] behaved really really well, so it was very very pleasant :)

We were really tired by the time we finished our lunch, so we decided to have a little fish spa experience instead. It was the first time for my sisters and my Sayang, and although it was the second time for me, IT STILL TICKLED LIKE HELL. My Babe liked it, so yeay! We can go to the one in Midvalley together woohoo!

And that night, we decided to go crazy and head to Penang island for dinner. We didn't know any good spot in the area, so we just thought since Abang Wan is familiar with Penang, we might as well try our luck. The traveling took a little longer than we expected, but the food at Padang Kota was pretty decent. Well, not for Abang Zul and Kak Syisya I guess. Other than that, it was a very nice, impromptu dinner outing.

So yeah. I had fun at Bukit Merah. But in all honesty, I wouldn't really recommend to people to go there. You really ought to have an open mind and an open heart in order to enjoy the place. Yes, I had fun at the island and the park, but I don't think they offer much more that what you can get at any zoos. The apartment itself was quite a disappointment. And the crowd.... well, I'm just not gonna go there.

But to enjoy/endure all that with the person you love most, and to share it with your family is priceless.

Pictures will be up soon. :D

Anyways, we came back yesterday, and reached home around 2.30pm. My sinus has graduated to full blown flu by this time, and my Babe and I almost decided to not go to Faezah's [Lyana's sister] wedding! But I don't want to risk being sorry for not attending the reception, or the wrath of Lyana, so we went anyways.

It was one of the most relaxed wedding I have ever been too. It was held in such a small scale, but lovely nevertheless. Faezah was radiant, and Lyana was equally gorgeous! Nawar, the groom, didn't look too bad himself. sigh. Too bad I forgot to bring my camera!

ugh my head's feeling a little heavy. I hope I'm not getting a fever.

i wish i can sleep and type at the same time.

2008-12-25T00:18:00.003+08:00

There's a huge zit a little on the left side of my forehead. Besides from being super huge, it is also super annoying and painful.

I'm currently taking a break from packing up things and clothes to bring to my family's Bukit Merah trip tomorrow. Well... not really a break la, more of a halt as I am effing sleepy and I'd rather continue in the morning with a much clearer mind.

I'm kinda excited about the trip, despite remembering that a few people I know told me that the place sucked. I googled the place, and found out that they mostly have nature-related activities. Now, to be honest, that's not really my thing. But who knows... It might be fun walking at the Ecopark.

Open mind, open heart. I'll probably have the time of my life.

I think my bed is calling out to me.

Merry Christmas, everyone :)

hahaha.

2008-12-19T17:23:00.002+08:00

I did a double-entry on the three things I love, related to the award. Oh well. Malas nak betulkan. :)

i wonder how long this post is going to be?

2008-12-19T15:37:00.005+08:00

haha I just realized that I was supposed to list three things that I love and nominate other bloggers I deemed worthy of the Kreativ Blogger award. My bad!

My list is as below:

a) I love the people I have around me; my great family, my best girls, my good friends, and my Baby Boo, definitely :)
b) I love cats (our Zoey Schmoey especially!)! I adore anything cat-related! Except for cat poo.
c) I love good food. Sometimes too much. heh :D

And for the award, I shall nominate:

a) Azzura - http://wickedrossored.blogspot.com/
b) Moqh - http://blog.mukhrizlatif.com/
c) Ili fm - uhh, what's your blog address?
d) Suffianr - And what's yours?

I'd name Najeeb, Kusa, Ikin and Saddiq as well, but they have all already been nominated at some point for the same award, so I don't want to be redundant.

Okay so let's move on.

You may realize from the date of my blog and the time, that I am blogging from the office right now, which is somewhat of a rarity. If you didn't, then you should already know since I just typed it out haha. The reason for this such rare, privileged occasion is...

THERE IS NO IFN NEWSLETTER FOR THE NEXT TWO WEEKS! woohoo~

There's no real reason to celebrate here, coz it's not like I won't have anything to do until January comes. But hell, I won't have to go back home late for the next two weeks, so I'm psyched about that. There's still reports to be written, and possibly people to interview, but I'd like to know how it feels to have a lil bit of a work-less Friday.

I hope my bosses won't kill me, if ever they found out :D

Especially since I'm kinda promoted, effective from January onwards :)

haha yup. No more Editorial Executive, hello Senior Writer! It's not really a promotion, coz we didn't have that position in IFN before (although there is a Senior Writer in IFA, another one of REDmoney's publication). Its more like a new position for me, with more work. And a bit more money.

Uhh. I think I just described a promotion. But anyways.

Azzura and I decided to meet up today for lunch to kind of celebrate my new appointment. And in a way to make it up to her for not being able to join the gurls yesterday, when they went shopping for bridesmaids' material for Noran's wedding. Azzura asked Noran, Animz and Along to come as well, but they're busy so nevermind. We'll have fun anyways.

Had a somewhat good lunch at Chakri Palace in KLCC; I say somewhat coz I had better Phad Thai in The Gardens. Bitched for a bit, walked and oogle over shoes and handbags and makeups for a while (while bitching duh), then settled at Starbucks for a bit for coffee (juice for Zura; no coffee! gila unlikely for her ok?!) and cake. And yes more bitching.

Of course, its great to hang out and just lepak with her, even for a couple of hours. Would love to lepak with her longer, but I still needed to drag my lazy bum to the office.

And oh, my office had the Xmas dinner on Tuesday, and my secret santa (Shashi, my copy editor. Gila terer hide it from me!) gave me A Thousand Splendid Suns! yeaayyyy~! I was the santa for Raphael, my editor, and I got him Philips' earphones. He told me he love them. Hopefully he told me the truth :P

And the dinner was great. It was held at The C Club in Pavilion, a jewelry boutique -cum-fine dining restaurant, owned by The Carat Club. The ambience was nice... We had the terrace all to ourselves! The food... well, it depends. Personally I find that there's nothing special about the mushroom soup, but the fish for main course was amazing. Took only a bite of the brownie ala mode, coz by then I was already too full.

And some of you may know how much I like watching people act silly... And I had a ball of a time that night! haha I dunno why, watching drunk people making little sense amuses me.

Okay I'm done. Only 45 minutes to go before I head to Kelana Jaya. Will be going out for a date with my Sayang later... We're having Bubba Gumps. :)

i crave for some meat.

2008-12-14T13:02:00.005+08:00

Its not too bad spending time alone at home on a Sunday. Well okay that's a lie; I'm kinda bored, but it's only for a few hours. I'm not exactly alone, actually... the girls [i.e the maids] are downstairs.

Why am I alone? My Babe and his bro, Chik, were invited to a friend's BBQ party. I didn't want to go coz I don't know anyone there, and I know there's a big chance that I'll just stick around my Sayang and socialize very minimally. So why not just let him do his own thing for a change and let them boys bond over a little game called WOW? That's how they know each other anyway.

Furthermore, I don't want to be like one of those people who insist on having their significant other do everything with them, and I feared that I was already becoming one. I know that weekends are our only real 'us' time together, but we'll get many more chances. :)

I got myself an award from Najeeb about two weeks ago. He thinks that I'm creative enough to be considered a Kreativ Blogger. Honestly, I don't know if I deserve to be called creative, coz to be honest, I don't have a single creative, artisitic bone in me! But I try to be in my writings, and Insya Allah I'll be able to channel it better in the future. So thanks Jeeb for thinking of me, and I am really really really happy! yeay! Its my first ever!

So anyways. The award.

As a rule, the recipient has to lis three things that he/she loves, and my list is as the following:

- I love my dad, my sisters and my little devils. I've said it before and I'll say it again; I am nothing without them. They have been with me through thick and thin, and they know for the person I am.
- I love my girls to tiny bits and pieces. Azzura, Animz, Noran, Along, Adik, Lyana and Ikin. You girls are my rock.
- My baby boo. My Sayang. My Husband. And Insya Allah, father of my child. wah gila babi corny haha~

Ikin also tagged me to post seven random things about myself. I'm pretty sure I did it before, but for the life of me I couldn't find it in my archive. I'm just gonna try find it one more time, and will do the tag if that doesn't work out as well.

Hmm. Almost 2pm. I think I'll watch a movie.

8.30pm on a Thursday night, and I'm doing nothing.

2008-12-04T19:36:00.002+08:00

I realize today that I've been doing most of my shopping alone lately. Its not much fun, especially during those crucial moments when I need to choose between two tops, or when I need a reasonable voice telling me that I have enough shoes as it is (which rarely gets through my head anyways haha).

Why? I don't know. My husband is not a mall person, I don't have much free time anyways on weekends, and so I resort to shopping on my home from work at KLCC.

However, solitary shopping does have its perks: I get some alone-time, and I find myself making good buys without other people influencing my decision.

But given the choice, I'd take shopping-cum-makan-cum-bitching session with my gurlies anytime, baby.

Talking about shopping, my company will be having a Christmas dinner in the middle of this month, before the bosses go for their holiday break (no bosses for 2 weeks! woohoo!). We're going to have a Secret Santa-thing that day; where you buy a gift for someone whose name you picked out randomly. I get to ask for something that I want in our wish list, and I know that I want a book. Question is: what book?

Any suggestions? I'm thinking of either A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini or Mark Haddon's The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time. What do you think?

4 cups of coffee made me a zombie.

2008-12-01T23:29:00.003+08:00

I know, I know... a proper update is due.

Been living a pretty much uneventful life as of late; things and shits do happen, but nothing big enough to blog about.

The big things that do occur are not my stories to tell, and so I keep mum.

The weekend was pretty much... slow. Didn't do much on Saturday, but had a blast hanging out with my sisters on Sunday. A drastic change from the busy-ness of the previous weekend.

And today was spent at Concorde for training. Went back relatively early, but had to go to town, and I just got back home like 15 minutes ago. So crazy tired, but I need my Internet fix.

I need to organize my life better. Things are not messed up, but it will be if I don't keep myself straight. There's this feeling that everything will just tumble down, or I will go crazy if I don't do something about the current state I am in.

I'm being vague, I know. I'm trying to figure out what I'm saying myself.

Or maybe I just need to sleep.

ps: Finished reading Love in the Time of Cholera. Awesome book. Everyone who knows how to read should read it. Also read Memories of My Melancholy Whore. Will start on A Hundred Years of Solitude soon.

just a short one.

2008-11-22T17:48:00.005+08:00

Thank you so much for the wishes and support some of you gave before my appraisal. It really means a lot to me.

It went well; it was still scary as feck, but no major screw-ups. All in all, I'm happy with them, they're happy with me, so for now we have a good relationship and hopefully it'll stay this way for a long time.

Alhamdullilah.

Can't type a long one, I'm determined to finish reading Love in the Time of Cholera this weekend. Has it already been two months since I bought it? Dang it, it usually takes me about 4 days to finish up a book!

Oh well. Wish me luck!

the nerve of me.

2008-11-17T21:42:00.002+08:00

I'm freaking out.

They tell me I have nothing to worry about; the appraisal is about getting my feedback on how I am in the company, how I feel, what I want to change, and what I want. That's what they say.

But there's this feeling. I'm anxious. Like I'm going to screw up somehow tomorrow.

Like they're going to realize that Elmira Azlan does not belong in the company.

*sigh*

I worry too much sometimes.

saturdays will no longer feel like saturdays for the next six months

2008-11-08T22:20:00.003+08:00

Went for my first non-managerial finance class today. Eight hours of accounting and shares was overwhelming, to say the least.

I hope I'll get something out of it. But if my cluelessness and sleepy state of being were any indication, I'm in for a rough ride.

Anyhoot. Here's one thing I miss the most about not living with my family anymore: the fact that I'm not living with them anymore.

Sure, we fight like cats and dogs [sometimes cats and cats], but making stupid jokes with them, being bullied by the little ones and gossiping with my sisters are always great. We're slightly dysfunctional, but we perform best that way.

Now that the class has begun, we're going to be making less visits to Serdang, but my Sayang and I are going to try. Like tomorrow. We're going out for breakfast at Raju in Jalan Gasing. It's like, millions of miles away from Serdang, but we thought it'll be nice to do something together since we don't have much chance to anymore.

Need to pack up some things. Gotta go!

a bad day, but a great night.

2008-11-01T10:02:00.005+08:00

If it wasn't for the date I had with the girls last night, I probably would have gone home and bang my head against the wall, screaming 'Why the fuck was I so stupid?!' over and over again. And I've been coughing like mad, so much that my chest hurts with every cough, so my day was definitely horrible. And that's an understatement.

I screwed up for the latest issue of the newsletter. Going into details would be lengthy, unnecessary and painful for me, and so I won't. And it's not something that I would want to remember either... though I know it's not something that I can easily forget. I'm pretty sure Melisa and Karen, two of my colleagues, as well as my boss are freaking stressed about it despite telling me to chill and not let it bother me too much; in the words my boss, 'shit happens'.

Suffice to say [in this blog at least], that it was the biggest fuck-up I ever did, and I'm surprised - but VERY thankful! - that I still have my job.

Moving on.

Azzura, Noran and I planned the outing since we met up at Zura's open house three weeks ago, so I wasn't going to let my depressed post-screw up state and my coughing stop me from having a great time. Anim joined in as well, although she just arrived from Perak.

We started off with dinner at Rak Thai in The Gardens. The food was, hmm... well, it depends on who you ask. If it's me and Zura, then we say its really good coz our dishes turned out really really yummy. Animz and Noran would say otherwise about theirs though.

Afterwards, off we go to Kenko to have the dead skin on our feet nibbled by little fishies. I didn't really have much reservations when we went there... I mean, I know it's gonna be ticklish, but how bad can it be? I seemed to have forgotten that I am EXTREMELY ticklish, until Noran and Azzura dipped their feet in first, and squirmed. When the three of them have completely soaked their feet in the water, mine was still a quarter way there, only dipping the cracked heels part of my feet.

I did manage to distract myself by taking photos, but I will probably need a book the next time around to completely divert my thoughts from the tickles.

The verdict? My cracked heels are really bad, so the 30 minutes was not enough for me to see any visible results. My feet did feel refreshed though, so it wasn't a complete waste. The girls said that they feel the results... I guess it works for those with not-too-serious cracked heels.

And we're definitely coming back again.

We've decided to make these little indulgence, such as this trip to Kenko, a permanent fixture in our monthly calendar. It's something that we have to do I guess, with our busy schedule not permitting us to meet up as much as we used to.

We finished off by having desserts at Secret Recipe. [by the way, its funny how I crave for ice-cream when I can't have any.] We talked and bitched; the perfect way to end the night, me thinks.

So thank you girls for brightening up my otherwise lousy day. Can't wait for the end of November for our next beauty trip. :)

the last Raya weekend this year...

2008-10-27T22:38:00.004+08:00

... Was spent by going to open houses. Today's Deepavali, so it's a public holiday, which meant an extra day off. But not really, considering that it was the last weekend of Syawal, so we made full use of it.

Went for two open houses on Saturday night; one at my Sayang's granduncle's place in PJ, and the other at Lyana's. Stayed on a tiny bit longer than we should have at her place, but I missed her, so I hope they didn't mind all that much. Didn't eat all that much since we already binged out at Tok Chik Rashid's, so it was more of lepak-with-Lyana kinda thing than it was a open house.

Sunday was spent in Ipoh, for my Wan Saha's [my dad's younger sister] open house cum doa selamat, as she is leaving for Mekah to perform the Haj early next month. Since we were already in the area, we decided to give Arnie a lil visit at her home in Kampar, and I finally tasted the finest Laksa Penang EVER. Seriously, if I didn't have too much too eat already, I would have asked for seconds!

And Monday was spent at home. Not leisurely, though. My Babe's parents invited my family over [excluding Abang Wan, there were 12 of them including the little ones!] for a little get together. It was noisy, the food was great, and there was a bit of drama as well - typical of most Syed Nor Azlan clan's get together.

And now I'm beat. But happy. And I blog about my weekend, which may be mediocre by some people's standard, as a way to say 'so long' to Syawal. And also because I don't have much to blog about haha~

So now, I shall dread for the things to come tomorrow: Work, and more work. *grumbles*

And because this is my blog, here is a photo:

With Fadlan and Dina. Comel terlampau.

13th July 2008

2008-10-21T01:06:00.010+08:00

And then, there was my Sayang's reception. At this point, I was done stressing out, and chose to just relax. We took our time to get ready, and I WAS SO GLAD I CHOSE KAK FIDA for this reception. She did a grand job, don't you think?

My Babe's parents took care of pretty much everything because... well, this is more for them than it was for us. And we understood that from the very beginning. You can say that we had the best of both worlds; a nice, simple, informal, modern-ish reception on my side, and a formal, grand, traditional event for his side. If you ask me to choose which one I like best, I honestly wouldn't be able to choose. Both were different in theme, in etiquette even.

My only qualm is that I did not get a family shot with my dad, siblings and little ones. Sucked as heck, but it was late by the time the reception ended, so we can't blame them.

I am vain. So sue me.

On the pelamin. Something we chose not to have on my reception. Kak Pa was my pengapit terjun haha!

Just Noran and Animz this time. Lyana, Along and Azzura couldn't make it.

The US Army. Nana, we look good!

Siblings-in-law and... siblings-in-law to be? Insya Allah :)

*Edited: By the way, having the best man sing a song for us after the reception simply ROCKS. haha. I just had to mention it.

12th July 2008

2008-10-21T00:07:00.011+08:00

The preparation was one of the most stressful experience I had ever endured; one with countless tears, sleepless nights, anxiety, and fear.

But the end result was one of the most beautiful, perfect time of my life; I was surrounded with (almost) all of the most important and treasured people in my existence, and I don't remember a time where I felt truly, truly blessed like I did on the 12th of July.

We wanted to keep it as simple as possible, and I think we managed to do so. There were hiccups, due to the lack of experience to managing/arranging something of that scale. The solemnization ceremony was especially stressful, especially when I found out that the mak andam forgot to about the banquet chairs for the bride and groom, when I was up on stage ready for the akad! And yes, my Sayang said the lafaz [just once! he rocks!] on stage. And then there was the one-hour interval, which was not enough considering that I had to change clothes, touch up on my make up, re-do my hair within that short period of time. (by the way, my hair and make up sucked. but in pictures, it didn't look too bad).

But the most memorable part ought to be that cheeky poem Fadhil [Kak Pa's friend] recited when we were eating. My Sayang even covered his face in... I don't know... what's the english word for segan? But yeah! It was the most random thing ever. But actually, I like that poem. Melayari bahtera. fuh!

The solemnization. When he said the lafaz, I thought he was rehearsing!

It was our day, so we'd be silly if we want to!

Alhamdullilah :)

My girls. What would I do without them? Even at the last minute, they pulled through for me.

My family. My rock.

To be honest, I fretted for a while, thinking about the things that I could have done to make the event better. And yes, I sighed ever so often, hitting myself mentally about how stupid I was to choose the mak andam. But then I looked at these photos, and I really couldn't ask for more.

It was more than enough. It was... yes, perfect.

:D

2008-10-13T23:11:00.003+08:00

So much for one lengthy post over the weekend. blergh.

The weekend wasn't too busy, but between catching up with my sleep, hanging out at my dad's with the most precious but naughty Dina, lepaking with Lyana and furniture shopping, I didn't really have the time to update my blog.

Hence a serious update is postponed, yet again.

I'll make it worthwhile, and that is a promise I can safely make.

But for now, its sleepy time~ haha. Seems like I do nothing but sleep, huh?

pledge.

2008-10-10T02:09:00.004+08:00

So many things to say, but alas sleepiness takes precedence.

This weekend. I'll blog this weekend. About my wedding [I know, almost three months overdue], my honeymoon, and tanjung mental. Right now, I'm sleepy. And tired.

By the way, for the first time since I began working with REDmoney, I felt like running off and just leave things be. And not care.

But of course, I didn't. And I do care. haih.

So this weekend. At least one lengthy post, I promise.

reminisce.

2008-10-03T01:13:00.003+08:00

I never realized that eating can be tiring.

But still, samprits and makmurs call out to me every time, at every houses I go to.

But Alhamdullilah. For the food, my family, and those I'm newly related to now that I am married to my Babe.

I miss the Raya I had when I was younger. The trip back to Ulu Kinta, playing bunga api to my heart's content [not mercun though, I'm such a coward], my late grandma's dodol, the image of my mom as she prepared the casing for the ketupat. All that hoopla.

I gradually grew up, but Raya was still an event I look forward to. We stopped making a priority to balik kampung a few days before the first of Syawal, but we try to go back when we can.

Then Mama passed away, and Raya became incomplete.

It's probably a stretch to say that the meaning of Raya has returned now that I am married. I won't lie. But things have definitely improved when compared to last Raya, for instance. Hopefully, things will further improve with each passing Syawal.

But one thing is for sure. I want my children [Insya Allah] to have great Raya celebrations. With bunga api, home-made ketupat, running around and making nuisance with the cousins, and so on. Yes, all that hoopla.

Who knows. Maybe by then Raya will have a new, better meaning.

Salam Aidilfitri!

2008-10-01T16:33:00.004+08:00

Just a quick one, to say:

Selamat Hari Raya everyone! If I ever crossed you, made you upset, say things or do things that might hurt you, I am sorry. I hope you are having a blessed and wonderful Eid with your family and loved ones. If you eat kuih samprit, ingatlah daku. That's my favorite kuih raya EVER!

Now. I think I go lie down. The only solution to four different servings of raya treats that I know of is sleep.

By the way, first Raya as a wife ROCKS. Well to be honest it really is no different than spending Raya with your family, but being together with your soulmate on the first day of Eid is just... splendid.

Ok. I go now.

no, i didn't lose any weight this Ramadhan.

2008-09-28T02:49:00.005+08:00

For as much as I love the idea, albeit a false one, of losing weight during Ramadhan, and having berbuka with my in-laws, my family, my friends and my Sayang, I honestly can't wait for the month to be over with. I don't mean it in a disrespectful way; I am simply glad that I will be able to get my normal sleeping hours back in three days' time. And I am looking forward to not being sleepy at 12 noon. Oh, especially that.

This week has been somewhat eventful. Had berbuka with the rest of the REDmoney people on Tuesday at Traders Hotel [which was really good], met up with Zara, Kak Dalin and her boyfriend on Wednesday, baked honey cornflakes cookies on Friday night [my first attempt, and a successful one at that!], and today at noon, I made some chocolate chip cookies [another successful first time!]. Okay, so it wasn't all that, but all these little things made me happy, so its something :P

Next week, I expect more happy happenings. It's Eid on Wednesday, whee~! It'll probably feel a little weird not waking up to my sister's screams and nags to get up early on the first day of raya, and then the little 'arguments' we have about who gets to use the bathroom first. We usually go to arwah Mama's kubur by noon, and that's something I'm going to have to do in the evening next Wednesday, with my Sayang instead of one big family in three separate cars. Before going to the kubur is the ritualistic salam session, but I'll get to do that with a different - and new - set of family this year.

Insya Allah, everything will turn out well.

Other things happening next week will be the return of Ikin and Bad from Japan for Raya, as well as the double-honeymoon we're having on this coming weekend. Will elaborate on that after Eid.

Uhhhh I have more things to say, but dang I need to sleep.

haih.

2008-09-20T13:25:00.003+08:00

Just ended a phone call with Ili. She's leaving for Liverpool tonight, pursuing her Masters degree in Music Management. [Music Management, I kid you not. To echo the words of a mutual friend, Wirda, Ili's going to be the only friend we know to actually marry a rock star.]

I couldn't send her off due to some other obligations, as well as the lack of transportation, so I thought I'd give her a call just to let her know. It was just a simple 'sorry I can't make it, good luck' etc kind of conversation. But i iz still sad :(

We have never been tight-knit-bound-together-for-life kind of friends. Not in a normal sense anyways. But we've always been in touch. And I've known her, as well as Azzura, since our primary school days. To say that we go way back is an understatement.

So the sudden tear and sniff that came after [well, during] the phone call, was a bit, how to say... out of the blue. But at the same, it didn't surprise me at all.

To Ili, we may have taken the years after high school for granted, meeting up only when it is convenient or for really important occasions. But you know that I got your back, and I'll miss you a hell lot in the next one year.

xoxo.

a quickie.

2008-09-17T11:45:00.003+08:00

Went out with Azzura, Animz and Noran to KLCC yesterday on a supposed shoes and handbag shopping trip. Had berbuka first at Signatures before pursuing our mission to spend money. Zura and I end up not buying anything, though Animz did get a pair of shoes and Noran got herself a sleek new MNG bag for work. Went to Starbucks afterwards to re-fuel, and most importantly, to gossip.

As usual, going out with these girls are fun, crazy, and loud. Gelak tak ingat. It usually gets even louder if Along is around.

But I seriously need a pair of heels to wear with baju kurung, dang it. But no, I don't think I'll ever get desperate enough to look for shoes in Vincci during sale. Not ever again.

i should catch up with my sleep, not updating my blog!

2008-09-13T05:30:00.005+08:00

Thank God it's Saturday.

It has been crazy at work this week. I guess in the end of the day, it was not something that I couldn't handle, but I wanted to do nothing but just pull out my hair at times. But I had two reasons not to:

1- It's not worth it, and
2- I love my locks!

To be fair, there were other things outside work that added up to the stress as well, but I don't want to indulge. Safe to say, you just can't change some things and some people, so it's best that you live with it the best that you can. At the of the day these things that annoy the crap out of you are just small things, and you just have to learn to see the bigger picture.

The stress will still be there, but you live better when you stop sweating the little stuff.

I am currently in page 44 of 'Love in the Time of Cholera'. Slow, I know, but I don't have much free time to read as I I liked to... not in Ramadhan at least. My sleeping pattern is way off - by the time I get home from work it's already time to break fast, afterwards is usually quality time with my Babe, then I have to sleep to wake up at 4.30am for sahur. The most I read in one sitting was yesterday at the office for 30 minutes I think, only because the network was down and I couldn't get any work done.

But I love it so far. It's a possible entry into my List of Favorite Books of All Time.

On another note, my dad has pneumonia. But minor I suppose, he wasn't admitted to the hospital, but he did get two different types of inhaler for his asthma. He's very stubborn, my dad; my sisters had to go through persuasive measures to get him to agree to go. He was still vacuuming the home! Not that he didn't want to, but he just has his own way of doing things. Plus he's degil. Of course, we didn't know it was pneumonia until they went to the hospital.

Alhamdulillah, it wasn't anything more serious. But the thought that it could be sure is scary.

And I just realize that, in this post at least, i start off a new topic with a lengthy paragraph, then finish it with a one- or two-liner.

I wonder if this is a pattern that I usually use. Hmm.

Anyways, I look forward to a semi-long weekend. Will be going to Ikano in the morning to do some errands for Mommy dearest, and possibly window-shopping for furniture for our new room in Shah Alam. Am likely to shop a little as well, but temptations need to be fought full-on. That is what Ramadhan is about, kan?

And ooh, buka puasa with the girls on Sunday! whee~

heaven is on earth.

2008-09-07T18:05:00.002+08:00

Just came back from a little shopping trip with Lyana. I needed a pair of flat work shoes pretty badly, but since the ones I really like are expensive, I decided to buy something cheap just to get by while I save money for the real deal. Also bought another pair of reasonably-priced flats to be worn for leisure, which I like even better than the first pair. Oh well.

But the best purchase I made today were three - and I really mean three - books by Gabriel García Márquez for RM69: One Hundred Years of Solitude, Love in the Time of Cholera and Memories of My Melancholy Whore.

Seriously, it was almost like the books were calling out to me. I mean, I've been wanting to read the first two books and was prepared to pay more than RM100 for them, but to pay RM69 and get another book by Márquez is a freaking, definite plus.

I'm on cloud nine.

six days.

2008-09-06T05:16:00.002+08:00

Ah... finally, Saturday is here. I plan to do nothing (well, not much anyways) for the weekend. I'm just looking forward to making up for the lack of sleep I've had these past week.

I'm seriously considering not having anymore rice for sahur. Or maybe not having sahur at all. Of course, the second one is not really an option. My stomach would growl in hunger by 2 pm. I never thought I'd say this, but there is such a thing as too much rice, after all. Today is the second day that I woke up without much of an appetite, but I ate anyways coz there was no bread and no cereal.

Oh well. So there is one thing for me to do this weekend. Grocery shopping.

Besides that, puasa has been kind to me this year. And surprisingly, I don't have the urge to splurge on food and buy unnecessarily for berbuka, so far, unlike previously. And taking some supplements during sahur helps a lot. My Sayang says I lost some inches. I don't know, but that sure sounds good.

Zoey just walked up on my lap... she wants to sleep I guess. A manja Zoey is rare, so I'm taking full advantage.

Till later!

update - on the event of a break-in

2008-09-01T14:17:00.002+08:00

He was released last night around 11pm after spending two nights in the lock-up. My Sayang and Padel decided not to press charges; his wife has returned the laptop and the money, so it didn't seem necessary. The bag's fate, however, is yet to be known.

Some people are not happy with his decision, I'm sure. And the what ifs did run through my head for a while: What if we're not the last of his victims? What if he's not remorseful? What if the wife is just as bad, but the fact that she was pregnant made us feel sorry?

But I respected my Sayang's decision. And I believe that this is wise of him. The wife deserves the benefit of a doubt. And we're hoping that maybe he will learn from this. We retrieved back most of what he took, and that was the agreement to have him released anyways.

[But the human that I am was annoyed when the wife kept on sms-ing my Sayang, creating sad sap stories to have him released and to settle things soon so that her husband can return home. For a while yesterday, I did feel like telling my Sayang to just pursue the case, but at the same time I thought, "Wouldn't I be doing the same if it was my husband?" But of course, if it was Kusa, I would've smacked his head hard first and warned him of the hell he'd get at home before doing all I can to have him released.]

It was noble of my Sayang to have made that decision. Judging from some people's reactions when I told them that the guy was released, I can honestly say that there's not many people who can do what my Sayang did.

I am proud of him.

Merdeka Day, Eve of the 1st of Ramadhan.

2008-08-31T16:33:00.004+08:00

Its the 51st year of independence for Malaysia. I wanted to write a short paragraph of how I feel about the country and all, but the I read Najeeb's entry and he pretty much sums up what I wanted to say.

Nevertheless, Happy Independence Day to Malaysia and all its citizens.

And tomorrow is the first day of Ramadhan. I'm very excited about it; with this being the first time with my Sayang as husband and wife. But I do feel a bit scared though, because when most wives are busy preparing food for their families, I will most probably be stuck in an LRT to get myself home. And a bit bummed possibly, because I won't get to berbuka with Baba and my sisters on a much much lesser frequency now.

I'll look forward to the weekends though, when I hope I will be able to at least cook up something simple for my Baby, and I plan to make one or two kuih raya as well. And maybe we can sneak in a day or two for berbuka with Baba. And maybe, just maybe... this year, Aidilfitri will feel like how Aidilfitri was when I was smaller, with more things to look forward to.

I hope everyone will have a wonderful Ramadhan, and may the blessings of the Almighty gives you strength in this holy month.

on the event of a break-in

2008-08-28T22:54:00.007+08:00

Some of you may have already know that someone broke into my Sayang's Subway store on Wednesday night. The culprit? A relatively new staff who hasn't been showing up to work since Saturday. His modus operandi makes me believe that he has been planning for this for quite some time, or worse, he did this before to a previous workplace.

He came in about 10 minutes after the night-shift staff closed down for the evening. He wore his Subway t-shirt, so that people around the area wouldn't get suspicious. We believe that he made a copy of the padlock keys using another staff's keys under the pretense of borrowing his bike [the staff had all his keys bunched up together]. He knew where to go and what to take; we lost some cash from the register, the small-change bureau [well that's what i call it], and of course, Padel's brand new laptop. He even took my Sayang's Braun Buffel bag to put the laptop in. He broke the grill at the back of the store to make it look like an outside job. Pretty smart huh? But at one point, he must've suddenly remembered that the store has CCTV cameras installed almost everywhere, and I bet he got scared. So he took a container, fill it up with water, and 'showered' the monitor with it.

And I mean just the monitor. He did absolutely nothing to the CPU which holds all the information. And that is seriously the dumbest thing.

Padel went the police station before my Sayang arrived at the store; at this point, we didn't know that the CCTV was not affected, and we didn't have a suspect. When Kusa arrived, he took the CCTV's CPU, borrowed a neighbor's monitor and plug it in, basically just trying if it would work. And then we saw him, and what he did.

Later on that day, the ever-so-smart husband of mine decided to try something to lure the fucker to the shop next day. He called the man's number, knowing that his wife would pick up, and asked the wife to tell him to collect his pay tomorrow and bring the Subway t-shirt along as to terminate his employment. It was a chance my Sayang took, and at this point we didn't know if it would work.

But it did. Boy, did it work.

I don't know what made him come to the shop this morning. Maybe it's sheer stupidity, maybe he really thought that we would never find out. From what my Sayang told me [from what his staff told him], when he came in, a couple of my Babe's staff were already waiting, one with a stick in his hand just in case he tries to run away. And, according to my husband, the fucker already had a resolved look on his face. When my Sayang finally got to the shop, two plain-clothed policemen were already there. When they showed the CCTV footage, he didn't even try to deny.

Maybe its the spirit of Ramadhan that has gotten into my Sayang and I, or maybe we truly are nice people [chewah], but the first thing we thought of is how difficult life is going to be for the wife, as she is four months' pregnant. We feel sorry. But at the same time a lesson must be taught. Nevermind that my Sayang said that the wife didn't look to shocked, and her reaction was too calm. Life is never easy when your significant other is behind bars. The police said that its too late to drop charges now as a case has been filed, so we need to pursue. We're meeting the sergeant today, so I'll update you on the progress.

For now, we are grateful that the laptop is safe [its with the police now], but there is no sign of the bag yet, and we're not too hopeful about the money. And Alhamdullilah, he's caught.

What a way to start Ramadhan, eh?

not-so-instant dinner

2008-08-26T23:39:00.002+08:00

Alhamdullilah.

I was supposed to have dinner with Noran and Azzura (and Animz too, I guess) to have a belated 'welcome to the age of 27' get-together for Zura, but I cancelled in the 11th hour as I thought I had to stay back at the office. But that didn't work out, and to sms them and say "eh let's have that dinner anyways" would be beyond rude on my part. Left with a few extra hours on my hand, and what did I do?

I made dinner for my Sayang.

Refering to the title of my post, I made him instant dinner that didn't exactly turn out to be so quick after all. The Betty Crocker tuna fettuccine alfredo I made him did save me time; and it didn't really taste that bad, considering that cream-sauced pasta is not on my favorite food list. But I wanted to give him a bit more than just out-of-the-box dinner, so I tried my hands on mug cake - basically moist chocolate cake in a mug.

It took a while longer than I expected to prepare it, probably because I was too worried about messing it up. Or maybe I was just slow. haha. The baking part was really easy and fast; only 3 minutes for each mug [I made two]. But it didn't turn out to be moist [so in the end I did sort of messed up], but it was really fluffy, and filling. And YUM! It wasn't too sweet, but 11.30pm is not really the best time to be eating cake, no?

My Babe and I ended up sharing 1 mug of cake. The other one is left alone in the kitchen, waiting to be eaten. Kesian.

It's a quarter after midnight. I should sleep.

Lo and behold! Its the new blisskat!

2008-08-23T12:39:00.004+08:00

After much procrastination [which is not new], I finally came around to actually start looking for a new layout for the blog. But I'm the least bit creative, and I really don't know much about using templates from other sources except blogger's.

After hearing my plight [more like after I whine like a schoolgirl], Ikin took it upon her to do something about it, and kind of surprised me by doing the new layout herself, and placing it together and make it look like what it is now.

I WUBB U IKIN!

It has ALL THE THINGS THAT I LOVE. And I didn't even request for any of these details from Ikin! Shows how much she knows me. And that we really don't have much friends hahaha.

First of all, there the colors... combination of pink and brown, and red. There are books, which I totally love, and a cat! And the jewelries are pretty much spot-on; the wedding ring, the necklace arwah Mama gave me, the earrings! The Mary Janes' shoes... they may be out of style, but I love them still! And I always put my hair up like that [when I actually have time to do things to my hair]. Ikin even got my mata buntang right! You rock, babe!

My Sayang said that it's cleaner now, and not so heavy anymore. So that's a definite plus.

I'm gonna go and do more 'oohs' and 'aah' over the blog.

Yeay!

a day before production deadline

2008-08-13T18:38:00.002+08:00

... and miraculously I managed to find time to do some memes. haha. Procrastinator at work!

1. Your nicknames given by loved ones:
- Mama Mia
- Merah
- busuk (but I will never acknowledge!)

2. You are a person who...
- wishes that she can run around wearing heels.

3. That someone special. Describe what makes him/her your special someone:
- He is the only person who can make me laugh even when I'm totally annoyed/pissed at him.

4. Your favorite food:
- Neng's cooking (she took care of me when I was a baby till I was 18)
- Baba's sambal tempoyak ikan bilis
- Chicken anything

5. Favorite color
- RED
- combination of pink and brown
- midnight blue

6. All-time favorite songs:
- There's a whole bunch of it, but Accidentally in Love by the Counting Crows is our official song.

7. A person's attitude or behavior that irks/annoys you:
- People who act like they know everything. No one does ok?
- People who act like they like they're the only two person in love in this whole wide effing world. Yes, I'm referring to one specific couple.
- Pushy people.

8. 3 "must-have" things in your handbags:
In this particular order
- Mobile phone
- Wallet
- Make-up bag

9. When was the last time you cried your heart out... and why?
A couple of months back, when I was preparing for my wedding. My dad and I see things differently. So we argued, we shouted, I cried.

10. Tag 5 of your friends:
- Freaks!

rollercoaster.

2008-07-30T20:30:00.003+08:00

I went back to work last Monday with a heavy heart. Seriously. It was so hard getting ready for work, and it had nothing to do with being sleepy! But the 2-week break did feel like it was longer... When I came in to work, I felt like I left my desk for far too long than a fortnight. But it was good to come back to something that I'm [pretty] good at. And despite all the dramas and stress, REDmoney is a good place.

But one of my sisters called me that night, and told me that my grandmother on my dad's side passed away. To be honest, despite being really frail and old, Pah U's passing was a huge shock. I was not particularly close to her, and she was not my biological grandmother; she was my dad's stepmom. But she was always kind, and a wonderful cook. Her small, slim frame can somehow light up the whole room with her presence. She always had nice things to say about everyone.

And on Saturday night, I found out that my granduncle on my mom's side passed away. Tok Halim's wife is my late mom's auntie. My second sister, Hani, is close to their daughter, Kak Dzuha. I call her Kak, or sis, as she is only a few years older than I am. His death must've been hard on the family. But he too was sick, but I have faith in what the Almighty has planned for us.

These news kind of gave me a reality check. There I was, a newly wed with a good job, good people surrounding her, and enough happiness to share with 100,000 people. And suddenly two members of my extended family passed away, and left us filled with tears and sorrow.

But then again, there is never a perfect timing when it comes to death.

And, I am reminded of what it was like when my mother left. Though I still have memories of her in me, admittedly I've been thinking of her on a much lesser frequency now. But whenever I remember that fateful Monday night in June three years ago, my heart gets tied up in such a knot that I have to tell myself to breathe. People go through so much shit and hardship in their life, but I can't think of anything worse than losing the person you love, depend on, and look up to leave before you are ready to let go.

Post-wedding FAQs

2008-07-30T20:04:00.004+08:00

I think I should make printouts and distribute them when people ask me any of these questions:

Question: How's life now that you're married?
Answer: It's pretty much the same, except that I get to see Kusa/Along/Hafiez more often.

When are you going for your honeymoon? or Where is your honeymoon?
We haven't made any firm plans for a honeymoon yet, but we had a 'mini-moon' in Melaka a few days after the wedding.

Where are you guys staying at?
At his parents' place.

Are you guys planning to live on your own?
Yes we do. But there are things to consider before we move out. So we're waiting for the right time. And money.

When are you starting a family?
Once we have our financials straightened out. Not so much about having money to burn, just enough to live comfortably. There's no point in having a baby if we're not sure how to pay for the baby's expenses as she/he is growing up!

i am married. omg.

2008-07-14T16:47:00.004+08:00

Alhamdullilah, everything turned out well. There were a lot of hiccups during my reception especially, but everything fell into its place eventually. I was surrounded by the people who were my pillars of strength during the months of the ordeal commonly known as 'wedding preaparation'.

There was my dad, with whom I had numerous arguments with during the whole process. We don't have the normal typical father-daughter relationship, but when he said during the merenjis ceremony that he wanted to kiss my cheeks, I had to fight the urge to cry and bawl there and then.

There were my sisters as well, without them I wouldn't be able to hold my reception. They joke that they provided the money for my majlis, but without them I honestly wouldn't know what to do. Kak Syisya and Kak Diana helped pointed out the mistakes I did and the mistakes that would have happened if certain things weren't addressed, and Kak Hani were in the picture quite late in the process, but she was there nonetheless. Kak Azfa was my replacement pengapit, since Azzura, who was supposed to be the maid of honor during the reception in KL was down with a terrible flu.

There were my niece and nephews, who despite their naughtiness, are the most adorable kids I know.

And finally, but never the least, there were my friends. The people who I depended on a lot during the whole planning process. I don't want to be biased, but Azzura was the go-to girl when I had to do things last minute. But that does not mean that Lyana, Hanim, Along and Noran did not help a lot! They did, and for that I am forever grateful.

The ceremonies were beautiful. The nikah was the event with the most hiccup, but it all went well. My Sayang said the lafaz in one breath, and took only one take! Funny thing is, I thought he was rehearsing! But he did very well. For that, I am very proud. Woohoo~

My reception afterwards was simple and intimate. There was not a lot of hoopla about it, but the turnout was pretty good. My Sayang's family reception, on the other hand, was in a much bigger scale, and very nicely done. It was grand. And honestly, I love my make up on Sunday much much more than the make up on the reception the day before. Thank you Kak Fida for making me feel like a queen!

Pictures will be up soon, insya Allah.

A new chapter has begun (chewah). But for now, let me just get used to the idea of calling my Sayang as Husband, and my in-law as Ayah and Mommy. It'll be fine insya Allah. I have five clearing days to register it all in.

i want cupcakes.

2008-06-23T20:07:00.003+08:00

So much to do, so little time.

Seriously, if it was up to me [like, really up to me and I don't have to consider how others feel but I know I have to coz I respect my dad and I'm nice that way sometimes], I'd forgo the reception and have a nice, intimate akad nikah and lunch/dinner instead. None of this worrying about things that may screw up, or about arguments that will probably happen.

None of this worrying about not having enough money to pay off things.

Let's hope that after the wedding, I'll be able to recall my wedding preparations and remember the good parts of it instead of the negative ones. Amin.

Less than three weeks away till the big day. I think Time finally discovered wings and decides to fly and leave me behind. But you know, I can't wait for the things to come after three weeks. Of course, it means that I don't have to deal with this stress anymore, but it also means that I get to be Mrs. Ezham Hafiez.

[I am right now trying to stop to say something silly to refute the romantic-ness of the above line. Kusa does that all the time; say something sweet and then ruin it by saying something like 'fuh ayat power'. I will NOT be like him! I will prove to him that we can be corny if we want to! Admittedly, this is hard. sigh.]

By the way, I've given up on trying to lose weight for my wedding haha. There's just so much stress going on, that I need my sugar and fatty food! :P

Work-wise, I am finally confirmed at my new workplace yeay! My two bosses, AM and AT [they're both Andrews so we sometimes refer to them by their initials] literally sang me praises in the confirmation letters. Not to brag, but I did improve a lot, and I'm hoping to improve a lot more so I can talk to them about more pay sometime soon. haha. And I love love love writing. Although admittedly, I find it hard to fall in love with the subject matter. [Islamic finance? Me? Srsly?]

I'm prompted to do the little meme that Ikin did on her blog. But alas, time my not permit me. Future in-laws are meeting my dad tonight.

Wish us luck!

shh. i'm blogging from the office. don't tell anyone.

2008-06-05T23:39:00.002+08:00

I wish there's a device that lets me blog just by thinking about them. If there is such a device, then I wouldn't have gone into a month-long [well, almost] hiatus.

It's 11:42 pm, and I'm still at the office. This is so far the most late I've stayed back at the office. My work was done by 10pm, which is still quite late, but I have to keep a colleague company.

Oh damn. Just when I want to blog, my friend decides to go home! haha.

Well. Lets hope this weekend will fare better, for the sake of my sanity.

Ciao~

a bridezilla in the making

2008-05-11T23:05:00.004+08:00

Okay. Enough relaxing after finishing up the report. From this week onwards, it's full-on wedding planning, baby.

Two months. Two short months.

You know how crazy these few months had been? I was so busy and tied up with stuff, I didn't even realize until about 4 days ago that my anniversary is coming at the end of the month. And that 2 weeks ago (27th April to be exact) was supposed to be me and my Sayang's own version of Valentine's. I never forget details like these. Never.

Oh well. I'll have a lifetime to remember. And a lifetime to keep on reminding him and hit him on his arm if he doesn't.

relieved!

2008-05-03T21:31:00.002+08:00

I have so much to tell, but at the same time I'm so tired I don't know if I can go for a long post this time. But here goes:

Alhamdullilah, my internship report has already been sent this evening. It's a whole load of burden off my chest, and my back, the whole of me. This means that I can concentrate on my wedding plans right now, and I have more 'me' time. And hopefully, I'll get to see Lyana after sooooo many times of pulling out at the last minute; either by herself or me.

Some of you may know, some may not; my former employer has given me my pay last week. Alhamdullilah! Met up with him yesterday to get his signature on my report, but some shit happened but at the end of the day, I'm glad that I don't have to ever deal with him again. Seriously.

And to celebrate the good week that I've had, I decided to cut my hair whee~

I'll take pictures [insya Allah] and show it to the world. It's basically shorter, the shortest since the past couple of years kot. No drastic change here; I'd save radical haircuts until after my wedding, thank you very much!

Ooh. I also had a celebratory dinner as well. I treated my Sayang [and myself, duh~] to some Fatty Crab! Ohmygod it's the best ever! My Sayang said that my method of cracking open the crabs is 'brutal', but dang it, that's how you enjoy your crab, kan? I had SOOOO much, that I think I've had my quota for at least a few months. I woke up this morning glowing from a good dinner. haha. My Baby would believe me; he knew how much I wanted to eat crabs for the past week or so.

Hmm. So what else yea? Oh, I've shifted to a new office. I'm with the same company, but since the old building will be demolished to make way for some new development, REDmoney has been shifted to Menara KUB, in Jalan Yap Kwan Seng. It's more spacious, and there's a lot of places to eat... but the convenience shops suck big time. There's two, and they're both small. It's nothing like the one we're used to in Angkasa Raya. Back at the old building, Kenda [that's the name of the shop] has TONS of things we can buy. International magazines, a selection of sandwiches including turkey ham, fruit tarts, crystal bracelets, good meehon goreng, and the best yet, collectors' old currency notes. I'm hitting myself for not getting that ancient 10 sen [or was it 50 sen] bill for Baba. I don't know from what year it's from, but Baba would have loved it.

But anyways. Some may assume that by the thing's I've listed, Kenda must be a sort of chic convenience shop. But I tell you it's not. It's seriously similar to one of those Kedai Runcit Ah Chong, only cleaner and more organized. I haven't been there that long to miss the building, but I sure will miss uncle Kenda.

Okay. I gotta go find the answer for life's biggest and most difficult question: What to have for dinner tonight?

Ciao all~

new baby makes 5!

2008-04-24T23:30:00.005+08:00

After spending 12 hours of my day in front of the PC in the office, I decided to spend more time in front of another PC, but this time to blog.

And it's all because I love you, dear readers. All 5 of you.

Work is good, and tiring. My pay from my old job I still have yet to receive. Wedding plans are moving, albeit very slowly. So basically, I've nothing new to tell. Well I do. But it's not about me.

My sister Diana gave birth yesterday to one of the cutest baby boy I've ever seen in my life! They haven't decided on the name yet, but I'll keep you posted. They're torn between Zaidan or Aidan Ilham. I personally like Aidan, but Zaidan has a nice ring to it. Furthermore Zaidan in Arabic means growth/bountiful [me thinks], but we can't seem to find what Aidan means.

I can't wait to hold him!

So other than work, wedding plans, internship report, and gushing at a newborn baby, what have I been up to?

I read. It's a way for me to catch up on my readings while at the same time kill time whenever I get on the train to or from work. I'm currently re-reading The Cider House Rules. Up until a few days ago, I was reading The Time Traveler's Wife. And that book is now officially my all time favorite novel.

It is about a time traveler who meets a woman at the library where he works at one day, and was told that the future him have visited her in the past since she was six. The movie progresses from there; how their relationship develops, the impact of his frequent MIAs, how they both deal with it. It was a complex, yet simple love story. It is one of the most beautiful stories I have ever read.

I love books, and close friends will know which makes to my lost of all-time favorites. But I have never feel so strongly about any other books, like the way I feel about this one by Audrey Niffenegger. I love the book so much, that I googled the author! Seriously! I NEVER google a writer before! And I keep the book by my bed, for times when I feel like I want to read on a chapter or excerpts that I like.

And there isn't many books where I actually imagined how it will look like on the silver screen. I imagine watching beautiful things, but then again, movies based on novels hardly ever work out great, don't you think? [Apparently the movie rights was bought by New Line Cinema and Plan B, owned by a particular Mr. Pitt and his ex-wife Ms. Aniston. Will we ever see the movie out? Hmm. maybe it's not meant to be.]

GO READ THE BOOK. Seriously. Requests to borrow mine will be entertained, eventually. haha. What does that mean? I don't know :P

Gotta go get showered. Ciao all~

i'm not gonna write you a love song

2008-04-06T21:35:00.002+08:00

And a week has since passed.

Hello all! The week has been ultra busy for me. Starting from next week onwards, work will be piling up as I'll be given more responsibilities, such as writing reports, and a journalism duty on Tuesday which gets me excited, but oh my God I'm so afraid I'll screw things up! So wish me luck, people!~

Got myself a new pair of Levi's today after uhm... 4 years? I've always seen the brand as one of the must-haves in my wardrobe, but the price does put me off a little bit. But thanks to my Sayang, a new pair is now mine! Yeay! haha.

Wedding plans are okay. Its going on, but at a slower rate. Things happen that makes me wanna settle for a nice little solemnization ceremony instead, without all these planning for a reception. Seriously. Coz in the end, its the marriage that matters, right? Furthermore, I'd prefer a small, intimate ceremony that's perfect, rather than planning for a reception that in the end I can't call my own.

But I've made peace with the demons in my head. Whatever will be, will be. I should focus my energy on bigger things that I can control.

Like my internship report. ugh. It's on a standstill right now. I know I should be finishing them up real SOON, and I will. At least I hope so!

I'll be meeting up with my ex-boss tomorrow. He has to give me my internship evaluation, and possibly the one month and a half pay that he owes me. Wish me luck people, and do send in a few doa my way!

Okay. Gotta do some work now. A little for the office, and a bit for my internship report. Off to dinner with my Baby after that, then home and straight to bed.

Later people. Have a great week! Ciao~

duit merah.

2008-03-28T23:49:00.003+08:00

Hello people~

It's been a while since my last post. My new job with the Islamic finance events/publishing company is terribly hectic, I can only spare a few quick messages through Gtalk to keep me in touch with Ikin or Azzura and whoever was online. I don't check my blog, my facebook, and my other emails other than Gmail.

It's hard to say if I love my job. I do like it coz it involves writing word play. But sitting in front of the pc for a minimum of 7 hours everyday, and doing the same thing for the whole time... it gets really mundane. Especially when you don't really know what some of the terms mean. For instance, subprime mortgage. What the...?

But I LOVE the environment. The office is not that big, but it does seat around 20 people comfortably. There's a proper feel of an office attached to it... I have a table with ample space, my own telephone, and I've received my first pay although I've been at the place for only one week. We have our own pantry and, and today - well this is lame, but still exciting - I get my own stationaries; pens, ruler, stapler, the whole works. I even have my own access card! COOL!

haha.

But of course, there's also a bit of a office 'he says, she says'. Basically some people don't like some other people. and the other people feels the same way towards the first group of people. It's not too much that I can't handle, but being a person who tries not to get involved [though I'm sure at one time I'll probably will], I hope they will just sort out their differences.

But then again, you can't really escape these things no matter where you work. If it's not one thing, it's another, right? And this isn't too bad... It's still normal. Nothing too bad.

Dang it. Why am I talking about my jon when I should be relaxing for the weekend anyways? [Yeah, like I'll relax... there's still the wedding planning and the damned internship report! blergh!]

Alia made cupcakes today. Well, she prepared the cupcakes in advance and we did the icing together a few hours ago. It's so obvious we're newbies at it, but I don't think it turned out too bad.

Oh goodness. I'm tired. Maybe I shouldn't have started talking about my job first. Sigh.

Oh well. Till the next time [most probably next weekend]... Ciao~

staying strong is hard to do.

2008-03-17T14:35:00.002+08:00

It was easy for me to vent out my anger and frustration. About my job, about the wedding, and till last year about college.

An on-going correspondence with a friend through facebook kind of set my feet on the ground again. I am not saying that what I'm going through is easy, or to say "ohmygod I have it soooo good, I shouldn't be fretting!" We all have different priorities in life, although some are more serious than others. And as time go by, as we get older, and things evolve around us, our priorities will shift. Mine are important for me, as it is to each and everyone of us.

But when I whine and vent, and thinking that my life sucks, I somehow pushed the thought that there are other bigger things in life, that other people need to let it out and cry as well. And yes, I am still venting, but I need to listen to others too, especially when it is as serious as what my friend is going through.

Her situation is tough. I empathize with her with a few of the issues she is going through, though on a few others... I can only imagine how she manage.

My prayers go out to you, Sha, and I have faith that you will persevere amidst all the madness.